“Tired of spending like 3 minutes or more on a typical heroic dungeon boss? Sick of seeing baddie dps doing less damage than the healer? Queue with a 402 ilvl dps! 100g/each normal or heroic dungeon. PST for invite!”
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Kissandkillu: is that a guild invigte?
davepoobond: a what now
Kissandkillu: what?
Kissandkillu: do you wish for a g iviite
davepoobond: i have a sick
Kissandkillu: ??
Kissandkillu: lol do I know you
davepoobond: yes
Kissandkillu: then I wish you love and tons of happniess
We have a guest this week! It’s Daniel, the guy that went to the strawberry festival last week. We put him on the grill and insult his decision for going to the strawberry festival along with his weird two-headed friend, Lucy the Two-Headed Goosey.
Get off my computer, Jamie Oliver. You’re not a chemist. You’re just an asshole.
Silly Jaime Oliver, we shouldn’t be throwing away perfectly edible food. We should at least ship it off to Africa!
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McDonalds used to be a value. Now they try to sell you everything in bulk so that there is the same perceived value as what was once known as the Dollar Menu.
The newer Dawn of the Dead introduced running zombies. Is it really that much weirder than the idea of zombies in the first place?
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[Rec] was a “demonic infestation” sort of zombie thing rather than a virus or reanimated corpses due to magic/radiation. By the way, that was a spoiler.
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Want to hire screamers with 13 dB yells or higher to make movies seem more scary than they are. Apply at the offices of William Castle.
This week we watched Chernobyl Diaries, a movie about a bunch of college kids going to Russia to dick around and take Instagrams of ruined buildings and put them in meaningless filters so that they can show off to their friends. They also bring their crazy knife-wielding soccer coach along for the lulz.
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Chernobyl Diaries has an old zombie lady masturbating in a closet in an attic of one of the buildings. Gross!
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Too much Carrie Underwood and Colbie Caillat in Chernobyl Diaries for my taste. It’s almost like a boring wedding video.
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This is the knife that the soccer coach had.
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Why does Will Smith like making sequels to movies 10 years after the fact? It’s not like he was doing anything that important in the mean time between movies. If he’s going to make a shitty movie, he might as well make it while it is still relevant.
Hologram Tupac takes the forefront in Men In Black III, don’t be fooled by the trailers. They’re pulling a Metal Gear Solid 2 on us.
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Ali 2 will be Will Smith walking around with Parkinson’s until he either cures it or dies from it, made in 2018.
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Independence Day 2 or even 3? Welcome to URF again in 10 years!
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Jeff Goldblum and Will Smith shitting on their White House and blowing up alien landmarks. How do you like that, mother fuckers!? Aliens getting shit on all the time!
Street Fighter and The Legend of Chun-Li had it right — only have a story about one character, not 35 million characters at the same time. That’s about the only thing they did right, and the rest of it was so wrong it was right.
George Lucas would probably go back into the Star Wars movies and remove Ewan MacGregor’s beauty marks just so that it is consistent through all of the movies.
Kind of something like this:
Ewan MacGregor After George Lucas Had His Way With Him
Everything is going to be made from the blood of trees now.
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The Middle East is just a big fucking desert, who cares what happens to the environment there. No one freakin lives there anyway. So let’s toss all of our unused plastic bags into it.
