Q: Why did so few blacks vote for Jesse Jackson?
A: He promised them jobs.
Q: Why did so few blacks vote for Jesse Jackson?
A: He promised them jobs.
Q: How do you blind an Asian?
A: You put a windshield in front of him.
Q: What do you call a gay guy in a wheelchair?
A: Roll-AIDS.
Q: How does Santa Claus know he’s at a Jewish house?
A: There is a parking meter on the roof.
Q: What do you call 10 black guys in a steam room?
A: Gorillas In The Mist.
A priest and a rabbi were walking down the side walk.
On the other side of the street they see a 12 year old boy.
The priest says “Lets go fuck him.”
The rabbi looks for a minute and then says “Out of what?”
After his wife had a baby, Michael Jackson asked the doctor when it would be OK to have sex again.
The doctor told him he should wait until the kid was at least 12 or 13 years old.
Q: Who does Michael Jackson consider to be a Perfect “10”?
A: Two 5 year olds.
Q: Why was Michael Jackson spotted at K-Mart?
A: He heard boys’ pants were half-off.
Q: What do you call a black guy drinking out of the toilet?
A: Pushing his luck.
Stop Dissing Poor Popeye
He’s an innocent Sailor Man
His Spinach Maybe Marijuana
But He’s Popeye The Nice Sailorman
Q: Why didn’t hydrogen and oxygen make water?
A: Because water has two hydrogens!! HA HA HA HA HA GET IT TWO HYDROGENS HA ISN’T THAT FUNNY!!!
kevmeister01: i like 2 POOP
kevmeister01: it keeps u regular
xoSuPa CaNdYox: o reely
kevmeister01: yes
kevmeister01: its a fact
xoSuPa CaNdYox: mmhmmm
WhiteBoi3313: =p
kevmeister01: yes
kevmeister01: quite
kevmeister01: indeed
WhiteBoi3313: lol
xoSuPa CaNdYox: yah im shur lol
xoSuPa CaNdYox: >.<
kevmeister01: peeing is pretty good 2 but its better when u pee in a bush
xoSuPa CaNdYox: no toilitz bettr
xoSuPa CaNdYox: cuz u cn whip ur ass on toilit paper
WhiteBoi3313: lol
kevmeister01: no cuz if u pee in a bush u might hit a homeless person
xoSuPa CaNdYox: soO when u pee in a toilit u pee on fishez
WhiteBoi3313: ya but pissin while drun if fun 2 caz u pee on ppl
kevmeister01: ya
xoSuPa CaNdYox: n besidez mr.toilit man luvz doodoo n peepee
kevmeister01: i like 2 pee on drunk ppl
xoSuPa CaNdYox: datz not fair cuz i cnt pee on no1
WhiteBoi3313: lol
WhiteBoi3313: brb
kevmeister01: ya u can
xoSuPa CaNdYox: no i cnt
kevmeister01: u just need 2 work on ur aim i can help
xoSuPa CaNdYox: lol wth
WhiteBoi3313: lol
xoSuPa CaNdYox: u jus wna play w/ me
xoSuPa CaNdYox: lol
WhiteBoi3313: no u squat on
WhiteBoi3313: their foot
kevmeister01: ya
WhiteBoi3313: =p
WhiteBoi3313: or leg
kevmeister01: or their face
xoSuPa CaNdYox: lol
WhiteBoi3313: ya thtl be funny with their tounge out befo they lik u u take a piss
kevmeister01: i go for the mouth all the time every time
WhiteBoi3313: lol
WhiteBoi3313: me cat is stupid
kevmeister01: thats good
WhiteBoi3313: i moving me hand around and its following it wiht it head its funny
kevmeister01: … quite
kevmeister01: indeed
WhiteBoi3313: lol
kevmeister01: yes
davepoobond: you poke so hard
Wendv: =____= that sounds wrong
davepoobond: huahuahuah
Wendv: lol
The computer is a resource that is used in everyday operation as a customer service representative. We say it is to help customers and to manage day-to-day operations of the cashier department, however we know that is only 25% of its use. Keeping up to date on fashion trends and celebrity gossip is tantamount to doing any actual “work” on the vestige known as the computer at the customer service desk.
How to Avoid Helping Customers
Furiously typing away at a computer makes it seem like you are very very very busy when in fact you’re not. Just don’t make eye contact and they’ll probably move on to the next register.
How to Avoid Helping Underlings
There are several folders on the desktop at your disposal to get those pesky cashiers off your back. It’s not your fault that they used the last copy of the availability form that had a big “ORIGINAL” written across it — oh no. But it certainly becomes your problem when cashiers are biting at your ankles and looking at you with dumb stares with their hand half-way inside of an empty folder wondering how to get what they need.
Just tell them “I’ll get it later.” Then never get it. That way someone else can do it and you don’t have to worry about shit. If it is important enough they’ll figure out a way to get it.
How to Deflect E-mail
If you feel so inclined to check the E-mail inbox, there are a number of things you could do. You could help each customer, but why would you do that when you could have someone else do it for you? Simply forward it all to the applicable managers and they can sort it out. Or why even do that? Forward it all to your supervisor and have him deal with it. You don’t get paid enough to deal with stupid bull shit.
Hell, just delete it all while you’re at it. No one needs the stupid bullshit customers spout in their stupid e-mails, after all.
How to Hide What You Are Doing
Sometimes it may not be inconspicuous when one of those assholes from the corporation come by and walk through the store and wonder why there are people in line at a register or why a cashier is standing around doing nothing (there’s never a happy medium with these guys). Always keep a blank, open tab and switch to it whenever you see someone that may get you into trouble walk by.