And the Lord said unto John, “Come forth and you will receive eternal life.”
But John came fifth, and won a toaster.
Category Archives: Jokes
The whole Joke archive. Tons of jokes!
Joke #24427
Two cows are standing in a field.
Cow 1: Did you hear about the outbreak of mad cow disease?
Cow 2: Good thing I’m a helicopter.
Joke #24426
Knock knock
Who’s there?
Europe
Europe who?
No ur a poo hahaha
Joke #24425
Q: What was a more important invention than the first telephone?
A: The second one.
Joke #24424
A farmer in the field with his cows counted 196 of them, but when he rounded them up he had 200.
Joke #24423
Q: Where did Mary go after the explosion?
A: Everywhere.
Joke #24422
Q: What’s clear and smells like red paint?
A: Chloroform. Shhhhh.
Joke #24421
My grandfather had the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the New York City zoo.
Joke #24420
Two mice chewing on a film roll. One of them goes:
“I think the book was better.”
Joke #24419
A toothless termite walked into a pub and asked:
“Is the bar tender here?”
Joke #24418
Q: What kind of bagel can fly?
A: A plain bagel.
Joke #24417
Q: What’s the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with breast implants?
A: One’s a crusty bus station and the other is a busty crustacean
Joke #24416
How long is a Chinese name
Joke #24415
Q: What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eye patch?
A: Names
Joke #24414
Q: What’s the stupidest animal in the jungle?
A: The polar bear.