Tag Archives: Screwed Up Chronicles

UPDATE 03-24-06

March 24, 2006 davepoobond Leave a comment

Pick of March 24, 2005

davepoobond: so, like, its been a while since I last updated…and um…this just so happens to be the first update of the new year, incidentally. So Happy New Year, Happy Valentine’s Day, Happy Saint Patrick’s Day, Happy Lent, Happy Martin Luther King Jr. Day, Happy My Birthday, Happy Birthday to Everyone Who Had a Birthday Between Last Update and This Update, and all those other crappy holidays people celebrate. But eff those holidays aliens celebrate.

March 19, 2005

Dictionary – 4900 words, 100 new. SUBMIT A WORD

Stupid IMs – Lumpy IM 6, Holmes IM 21, Evil Hell Cow IM 17, MyLeftTesticle IM 5, Phoenix IM 6, Phoenix IM 7, Coldxs666 IM, Evil Hell Cow IM 18, Fire IM 4, Fire IM 5, I love poisons IM, SexyLakerGurly IM, davepoobond IM 50, SN Chopsui IM, DrumsPlayMike IM

Jokes – Good Bad Worse Jokes

The Screwed Up Games – Revolution Controller Theory

Site Updates

UPDATE 1-16-05

January 16, 2005 davepoobond Leave a comment

Pick of January 16, 2005

davepoobond: well, finally a new year….and if you’re expecting any resolutions from me, you can just blow it out your rear. Why should I change according to popular opinion saying you need to change something you do at the beginning of the year and end up not having done anything about it in the end anyway? I turned 19 on the 5th of January. Hooray for me…19 is the worst age, you don’t get any more rights than you were when you were 18…same as 20, except 20 is one year away from being 21.

Soup Nazi: Poo water.

Nose: i’m afraid you lost me with the r

January 16, 2005

Dictionary – 4300 words, 100 new. SUBMIT A WORD

The Screwed Up People – davepoobond: What Should I Write About?, davepoobond: 3 Things That Make Me Feel Proud, Special, or Unique

Stupid IMs – LilAngelGurl IM 9, Holmes IM 10, Evil Hell Cow IM 3, wangerspanker IM 6, Holmes IM 11, Evil IM, davepoobond IM 33, davepoobond IM 34, The Peaman That Is Not a Man IM 3, The Peaman That Is Not a Man IM 4, Holmes IM 12

The Screwed Up TV – I Hate Degrassi, by Return of the Dragon with an addition by davepoobond

Site Updates

December 18, 2004

December 18, 2004 davepoobond Leave a comment

Stories – Stuck In the Past – a sappy stupid story about crappy shit

The Screwed Up People – davepoobond: Dreams of the Future

The Screwed Up Internet – The File Sharing Debate: Against File Sharing, Suing America: A Synopsis of Events in File Sharing to the Present Day, Suing America: The Notes

Site Updates

December 15, 2004

December 15, 2004 davepoobond Leave a comment

Stories – Capitalistic Tyranny – a short story about the future.

The Screwed Up World – The Metric System is for Wussies

Site Updates

UPDATE 12-14-04

December 14, 2004 davepoobond Leave a comment

Pick of December 14, 2004

davepoobond: you know a movie is bad when the info for the movie criticizes it. This is TV Guide’s description for League of Extraordinary Gentlemen: Seven literary characters search for a coherent plot in this extremely ordinary adventure based on the comic book series. There are so many wrong things with this description. For one thing, seven literary characters looking for a coherent plot would be something that, I would make, and this isn’t the actual movie’s plot for the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, at all. BOO TV Guide.

I’m going to change the way I do updates on Squackle now. Since it takes forever to make big updates, I’m going to just put stuff up in small spurts. It’ll go by the particular day I update, and I’ll make a new update quote thing every month…let’s just see how it goes.

Soup Nazi: Is everyone still watching? Can I stop, yet? WHEN WILL YOU FUCKIN’ LOVE ME?!

December 14, 2004

Dictionary – 4200 words, 100 new. SUBMIT A WORD

The Screwed Up Country – USA: American History – an elaborate exposure to the truth, by Soup Nazi

Stupid IMs – texansfan IM, Blind Bubba IM 23, wangerspanker IM 4, wangerspanker IM 5, Blind Bubba IM 24, Automatic Man IM 6

Squackle Broadcasting Company (SBC) – Movie: The Gaytrix: Regayed

Site Updates

UPDATE 10-18-04

October 18, 2004 davepoobond Leave a comment

Pick of October 18, 2004

davepoobond: Rejoice! The Bulletin Board/Forums have become fully operational! Today is also Squackle!’s Birthday, so there is an extra special bigger-than-usual (I think) update for it’s 5th, count it, 5th birthday.

stimpyismyname: I haven’t eaten a muffin in over a year. Happy fucking birthday

Elias: Five years may not a seem like a long time, but when one realizes that it’s only 13 years away from being able to legally buy a shotgun, it seems a whole hell of a lot longer, especailly since I don’t think anyone at Squackle should be allowed to carry a shotgun.

Nose: happy birthday squackle

Soup Nazi: Fat gothic girls are like piles of rocks. You just don’t know what to do when you stare at them.

elmoisfurry: Happy mother-fucking birthday Squackle. America, FUCK YEA! and all that sort of shit. I also think that I should take over the body of some random animal (preferably a koala) and just fucking rip up a shit load of people. ‘Cause people suck. UC Davis is where its at, holla!…no, FUCK holla, and fuck your goddam conservative republican bullshit! Vote Bush out, Vote Grizzly Adams ’04

Holmes: Squackle loved me soo much that I contracted herpes. Thank you squackle!

Blind Bubba: hamburgers rock, but there is no ham in the burger

stuff updated/put up:

Dictionary – 4100 words, 100 new. SUBMIT A WORD

NEW SECTION! The Elias Account – Higher Education, and Much, Much Higher Inebriation, Why I Hate Rap Music, Exactly How Many Brain Cells do I have to Kill Before I Find Parties Entertaining?, Hanging onto Sanity by a Very Thin Thread: Why I Despise Clothing

The Screwed Up Country – The Presidential Debates 2004

Stupid IMs – LaikDog2002 IM, LiLPrettiBoi IM, murfsurfdad IM, puppyluvingal IM, SisterDopeness IM, SpongeBobSam IM, KungPowJuggalo IM, Sprivenx IM, KungPowJuggalo IM 2

Pictures – tic tac die brainstorm, snowboarder, yale

Questionable Content / QC Comics – BLAH, Jesus, My Idol, A Schaafsma/Mr. Shaft-Man Comic

Questionable Content / Movies – Kickin It, T.P. Spells Trouble, Drag Race Disaster, Long Day At the Mall, Runaway Rescue, School House Blues, Workplace Woes, Dumbass

Site Updates

UPDATE 9-10-04

September 10, 2004 davepoobond Leave a comment

Pick of September 10, 2004

davepoobond: HLLO EVRONE HO R U TDY?@?! Anyhow, here’s some stuff that you might find enjoyable for the next long while…We finally have 4000 words in our dictionary now. YAY.

Also, a special shout out to all those myspace, xanga, and livejournal users who seem to like to link to the midis in our midis section to be played on their journals. Your daily use of our bandwidth makes me happy (Translation: If I ever find out who you are in real life, I’ll cut your throat). Enjoy the midis anyway! (Translation: Die.)

f roy132 loves you though…as well as everyone. In case you don’t know who she is, she’s the Mistress of the Bulletin Board, and has more posts than even I do.

Speaking of the bulletin board, it and all its parts (like downloads) will be up as soon as possible.

Elias: No, seriously, I didn’t kill a cheap, cyphalis-infected hooker, and bury her below five trashbags filled with German Shepherd shit in a dark, muggy alley. Seriously, dude, I didn’t do it.

stuff updated/put up:

Dictionary – 4000 words, 50 new. SUBMIT A WORD

About Us – NEW SQUACKLE MEMBER, HOORAY. His name is Elias.

Stupid IMs – LilAngelGurl IM 8, Marie 8973 IM, Blind Bubba IM 22, AngelBabi IM, FoozBlondeSista IM, cajungirl18386 IM, beachbaby84283 IM, bethb IM, bethb IM 2

Squackle Broadcasting Company (SBC) – Movie: Hot Wax Vol. 2, PSA: I Don’t Want It

The Screwed Up World – Is Hell Exothermic or Endothermic?

The Screwed Up Internet – Creative Spam? You’ve Got To Be Kidding Me…

Songs – Ode to Me

THE NEW CHAT ROOM – Chat with us hereeeeee and tell others to come tooooo

Site Updates

Sub-Update 6-26-04

June 26, 2004 davepoobond Leave a comment

davepoobond: I moved some things from Screwed Up World to Screwed Up Internet. Hooray for me.

Site Updates

UPDATE 6-23-04

June 23, 2004 davepoobond Leave a comment

Pick of June 23, 2004

davepoobond: Well, its been a month since I updated…hmm…I graduated from High School on the 17th of June, hooray for me…

stuff updated/put up:

Dictionary – 3900 words, 50 new. SUBMIT A WORD

Stupid IMs – Holmes IM 7, Evil Hell Cow IM 2, TJ the Almighty IM, Holmes IM 8, Holmes IM 9, wangerspanker IM 3, Katerina Asigiri IM, BB Organization IMs

Questionable Content / QC Comics – Blam Guy Vs. The Terminator, Sewer Boy At His Finest, If My Dog Were President

Questionable Content / Movies – Little Jonny, Stoopid Komiks 1, Stoopid Komiks 2

The Screwed Up World – 10-10-Dead, Trash Cans – The Portal to Another World, The Melon Gripe, The PS3 Theory

Site Updates

UPDATE 4-14-04

April 14, 2004 davepoobond Leave a comment

Pick of April 14, 2004

davepoobond: Ok, 2 things. If anyone is willing to help me out and build a php-mysql system for Squackle for free, contact me.

and the 2nd thing is: I found out I got nominated for Prom Court today. You may think now that I’m one of those guys that are elected to all the things that there is a popularity contest for, but I’m actually the opposite. So this is actually sort of funny. I can probably have a chance at becoming Prom King, too.

I’ll do a sub-update to tell you guys if I actually got into Prom Court, and then later if I was King or not. If you care.

stimpyismyname: I don’t know much about computers other than.. other than the one we got at my house my mom put a couple games on there and I play em.

stuff updated/put up:

Dictionary – 3800 words, 100 new. SUBMIT A WORD

Stupid IMs – Serori IM, MalibuMooN IM, Holic1299 and StageDive3k IMs, Stupid IMs Parody IM, MyLeftTesticle IM 2, davepoobond IM 32, Tetsuya IM, Fire IM 3, Lumpy IM 3

The Screwed Up Country – Rose gardens

The Screwed Up Games – Blood of War 3: Operation Snow (PC) (Rating: 1/10), Stranded In Space (PC) (Rating: 8/10)

Questionable Content / QC Comics – Evolution of the Stickman, Surprise Balloon, Construction Worker, The Bormanator, Squackle! Comics: Espanol para Beginners

Pictures – Saddam Suzy, Lime Cat, The Japanese are Amazing, Money Finger, Money Shot, Beware of Monkies, OMG Cheese, Scared Freak, Pirate Ship

Stories – Applications In Space – a suspenseful story. OooOh.

Other Junk – Fun Stuff to Do

The Bad Submission Archive – Bad Submission 148, Bad Submission 149, Bad Submission 150

Site Updates

UPDATE 3-12-04

March 12, 2004 davepoobond Leave a comment

Pick of March 12, 2004

davepoobond: Woweee…its been a month since I last updated. Time flies when you’re slacking off, I guess. Sorry for such a late update.

Ok…so, if you’re actually interested, I’ve been making my own songs with a song making program…thing…and I’ll put them up eventually, one day.

stuff updated/put up:

Dictionary – 3700 words, 100 new. SUBMIT A WORD

Stupid IMs – Blind Bubba IM 20, Raini Majora IM, Blind Bubba IM 21, Tnnisdude IM

The Screwed Up Games – War Against U.S. Terror (PC) (Rating: 9/10), Sauen’s Christmas Game (PC) (Rating: 2/10), Gunman Chronicles (PC) (Rating: 5/10)

Pictures – Crack Junkie, BizMan, Kick Aliens In the Face, California Storm, Dorothy Joe, Great Pumpkin, Gulf Wars Episode II, Jack and Scooby

Questionable Content / QC Comics – Space Demon, fft, Blam Man

The Bad Submission Archive – Bad Submission 145, Bad Submission 146, Bad Submission 147

Other Junk – Find Your Armenian Name, Find Your Retard Name, Find Your Star Wars Name, Find Your Porn-Star Name

Site Updates

UPDATE 2-03-04

February 3, 2004 davepoobond Leave a comment

Pick of February 3, 2004

davepoobond: hooray, I only updated once last month. Aren’t you proud of me? It was a busy month, with finals and all. I’ll try and update again next week.

stuff updated/put up:

Dictionary – 3550 words, 50 new. SUBMIT A WORD

The Screwed Up Games – Sticktra 2 (PC) (Rating: 4/10), Battle Bees (PC) (Rating: 8/10)

The Screwed Up Movies – American History X in 30 Seconds, Dawn of the Dead (Rating: 0/10)

Stupid IMs – SeXiELeXi2FiNe4u IM, Soup Nazi IM 7, LilAngelGurl IM 7, Squall IM

The Fan Mail Archive – Fan Mail 11, Fan Mail 12

The Hate Mail Archive – Hate Mail 5, Hate Mail 6, Hate Mail 7, Hate Mail 8

Songs – Anti-Barney the Dinosaur Songs

Squackle Quotes – Misc. Quotes, Movies, The Internet

Site Updates

UPDATE 1-20-04

January 20, 2004 davepoobond Leave a comment

Pick of January 20, 2004

davepoobond: whoopee. An update. I missed American Idol today so that I could do this update. I hope you’re happy. They better rerun today’s episode soon. I turned 18 on the 5th, I’m sorry I didn’t have a special little “birthday” update kind of thing.

stimpyismyname: I like to live in my own self-denial that Squackle is the greatest web site in the world. (he didn’t actually say that, he wanted to say this: “i dont know… fuck everyone”)

stuff updated/put up:

Dictionary – 3500 words, 50 new. SUBMIT A WORD

Screwed Up Chronicles – The Screwed Up Internet, The Screwed Up Computers

Squackle Quotes – Mrs. Stickums, Radio, TV, Mr. P-yooson, Misc. Quotes, Movies, davepoobond, Around School, stimpyismyname

Stupid IMs – JeRzIe GaL12 IM, elmoisfurry IM 35, davepoobond IM 31, Blind Bubba IM 17, Blind Bubba IM 18

The Screwed Up Country – Australia: Beware of the Dingos (picture added)

The Screwed Up Games – Zelda: A Link to the Past (SNES) (Rating: 10/10), Battlefield 1942 (PC) (Rating: 10/10), 5 Finger Fillet (PC) (Rating: 2/10), Sticktra (PC) (Rating: 2/10), Max Payne (PC) (Rating: 10/10)

Site Updates, Squackle Sports Arena

UPDATE 11-08-03

November 8, 2003 davepoobond Leave a comment

Pick of November 8, 2003

davepoobond: I don’t have any snappy comments today. If you care, I’m working on the next 4 Gaytrix movie parodies, so there’s something to look forward to, when I put them up which will probably 2 years from now since that’s just how things go.

stuff updated/put up:

Dictionary – 3200 words, 50 new. SUBMIT A WORD

Songs – Portaloo, sung to “Waterloo” by ABBA

The Screwed Up People – The stereotypical female Volvo driver

The Screwed Up World – File Sharing and the RIAA Theory

Stupid IMs – Anonymous IM, Anonymous IM 2, urgirl3582 IM, davepoobond IM 26, davepoobond IM 27, davepoobond IM 28

Squackle Guides – How to Preread a Textbook Chapter, How to Make a DVD, How to Get Orvillized, How To Make a Squackle Gang (New elements added! HOORRAYYY)

Squackle Sports Arena – Chicken Soup Bowling Rules, Extreme Baseball Rules, Annoy the Teacher Rules

The Bad Submission Archive – Bad Submission 121, Bad Submission 122, Bad Submission 123