Q: What’s the difference between an eleven-year-old girl and a fifteen-year-old girl?
A: A five-dollar difference in your phone bill.
Category Archives: Jokes
The whole Joke archive. Tons of jokes!
Joke #12477
A word to the wise: People with the last name of Train should never nickname any of their children “Choo Choo.”
Joke #12476
Of course you’ve heard of the Hollywood starlet who’s had so much plastic surgery that if she gets too close to an open flame she melts.
Joke #12475
After having long hair and a beard and mustache for several years, a hippie shaved his face clean and got a crewcut. When asked why he did it, the hippie replied, “I forgot what I looked like and wanted to refresh my memory.”
Joke #12474
Just once, I’d like to meet an honest man who responds to a question about his marital status by saying, “I’ve been an unhappily married man for ten years.”
Joke #12473
PAPER BOY: “There’s a guy on my route who has sixty-two different daily newspaper delivered to his place every day.”
GIRL: “Wow. He must be a well-read intellectual.”
PAPER BOY: “Nope. He owns a pet store.”
Joke #12472
Ban government-operated dry cleaning shops. Let Americans have freedom of the press!
Joke #12471
Now I’m sure the I.R.S. is robbing taxpayers blind… Yesterday I saw a poster of Uncle Sam and he was carrying a pistol and wearing a mask.
Joke #12470
The United States Mint just issued a statement saying they’d like to replace one-dollar bills with two-dollar bills. Heck! Inflation did that a long time ago.
Joke #12469
The price of milk is so high, it’s almost cheaper to buy ice cream and melt it down.
Joke #12468
I don’t think that the economy is recovering… I’m convinced that it’s terminally ill.
Joke #12467
As far as I’m concerned, members of the I.R.S. are just pickpockets with friends in high places.
Joke #12466
POLITICIAN: “I ask you to vote for me. I’m a man who never stole anything in my life. And all I want is a chance.”
Joke #12465
Biologists claim there isn’t a perfect man on the entire globe… Apparently they haven’t read any presidential campaign literature lately.
Joke #12464
Scientists are now predicting that Martians will visit the United States in the near future to establish diplomatic relations. Economists are predicting that the Martians will apply for foreign aid and get it.