miembroap – n. a 30-year tax credit
“I am talking for both you ladies, I could be talking about paying my taxes or taking a bath, I’m not talking about Jeopardy for my enjoyment”
– Mrs. Stickums
Inflation must be hurting everybody. Last week I cashed my income tax refund and the check bounced.
To a father, a new baby is an addition to his family and a deduction on his income tax.
I’m in bad shape financially. I just second mortgaged my house to pay the loan I took out to pay my income tax.
Cloning isn’t a new process. For years, every time I filled out my income tax, I doubled my dependents.
I.R.S. AGENT: “Mr. Smith, you’ve been claiming your mother as a tax exemption for five years, and she’s been deceased for five years. What is your explanation?”
SMITH: “Well, you see, sir, my mother is still very much alive in my heart.”
Now I’m sure the I.R.S. is robbing taxpayers blind… Yesterday I saw a poster of Uncle Sam and he was carrying a pistol and wearing a mask.
As far as I’m concerned, members of the I.R.S. are just pickpockets with friends in high places.
In Dallas, the local I.R.S. agents have come up with a new nickname. They’ve dubbed themselves “The Taxes Rangers.”
Inflation has even affected our police operations. Now the cops only look for missing persons who owe back taxes.
If the meek inherit the earth, a bold I.R.S. agent will find a way to make them pay inheritance tax.
Help combat inheritance tax. Die broke!
cahx – v. to pay tax on illegal drug sales
A visitor from The Netherlands was chatting with his American friend and was jokingly explaining about the red, white and blue in the Netherlands flag.
“Our flag symbolizes our taxes,” he said. “We get red when we talk about them, white when we get our tax bill, and blue after we pay them.”
“That’s the same with us,” the American said, “only we see stars, too.”