“Did you hear about the moron who couldn’t get his stocking to hang over the fireplace on Christmas Eve?”
“No. What did he do?”
“He finally took it off his foot.”
Category Archives: (F) Conversational Joke
Joke #13267
NICKY: “Are you fishing in the river?”
MICKEY: “No! I”m standing here washing worms.”
Joke #13266
JACK: “I hate playing tennis with a sore loser.”
JIM: “Well, I’d rather play tennis with a sore loser than a good winner.”
Joke #13264
MAN: “Do you know what a target range is used for?”
MORON: “Sure. To cook targets.”
Joke #13262
HOBO WOLF TO RICH LAMB: “I’m broke. Can I put the bite on you for dinner?”
Joke #13261
FATHER: “Where are the Appalachians?”
SON: “I think they’re in the refrigerator, Dad.”
Joke #13260
HUSBAND #1: “Is your wife having any success learning to drive?”
HUSBAND #2: “Some. Now the road is beginning to turn at the same time she decides to.”
Joke #13259
HUSBAND #1: “How long did it take you to teach your wife how to drive?”
HUSBAND #2: “Oh, about three and a half cars.”
Joke #13253
#1082: “What are you in for?”
#1081: “For feeding the pigeons in the park.”
#1082: “Just for feeding the pigeons?”
#1081: “Yep! The cops caught me feeding the pigeons to the lions in the zoo.”
Joke #13251
JUDGE: “Mr. Nerpo, you have been acquitted on the charge of bigamy. You can go home now.”
MR. NERPO: “Thanks! But which home?”
Joke #13249
JUDGE: “Who was driving when you ran into the truck?”
PRISONER: “No one was, Your Honor. We were all in the back seat singing!”
Joke #13247
JUDGE: “Why do you rob banks?”
CROOK: “Well, Your Honor, that’s where the money is.”
Joke #13243
A crook walked up to a man and pointed a gun at him. “Stick ’em up,” he yelled.
“Stick what up?” the victim asked.
“Look, don’t mix me up,” the crook replied. “This is my first job.”
Joke #13242
PLAINTIFF: “Your Honor, the defendant drove down my street in his car, hit me and knocked me into some bushes twenty feet away. He’s guilty of reckless driving.”
DEFENDANT: “Maybe I am, Your Honor, but he’s guilty of leaving the scene of an accident.”
Joke #13241
GANGSTER: “I wouldn’t say Sharkey writes rubber checks, but I would tell you this. You can dribble his checkbook.”