The father told his son, “I won’t waste money on pet food. If you want a pet, get one that will eat table scraps.”
The next day the son brought home a termite farm.
Tag Archives: son
Joke #12644
SON: “When you were in school, Dad, did you participate in any sports?”
FATHER: “Track was my best sport. I’ll never forget the day I ran the hundred-yard dash in only seven seconds. And if I ever catch the guy who put those bees in my shorts, I’ll kill him!”
Joke #12598
MAN: “My son is sure learning a lot at business school.”
FRIEND: “Like what?”
MAN: “Well, he never writes home asking for money anymore. He just bills us for a loan.”
Joke #12582
DAD: “Son, I want you to have something I never had in school.”
SON: “What’s that? Passing grades?”
Joke #12396
A father knows his kids are growing up when his daughter starts applying lipstick and his son starts wiping it off.
Joke #12159
GAS ATTENDANT: “That’s a neat car you have, mister. How many miles do you get to a gallon?”
CUSTOMER: “I only get about three miles to a gallon. My teen-aged son gets the other twenty.”
Joke #12078
A soldier was back home after spending nine months in the Army. His mother asked, “How is the food in the Army?”
Her son replied, “Real bad, Mom. Why some times I could only go back for seconds.”
Joke #12052
SON: “Hey, Dad, what did you do in the war?”
DAD: “I was a pilot. I shot down 24 planes. Some of them were the enemies’.”
Joke #12049
FATHER: “Is it true the navy has a submarine that can stay underwater for months?”
SAILOR SON: “Yes, we have one that now only comes up so the men can vote in a presidential election.”
Joke #12046
A twelve-year-old boy came home from the movies and his mother asked him how the picture was.
The lad said, “A real bomb! I could hardly sit through it the second time.”
Joke #12045
A father was reading the newspaper one night and he commented, “It says here an old woman died and police found 50,000 dollars hidden in her bustle.”
His teenage son replied, “Wow! That’s a lot of money to leave behind.”
Joke #12040
When the man of the house returned from work, his son said, “Dad there was a man here to see you this morning.”
The father asked, “Did the man have a bill?”
The kid answered, “No, he had a nose like yours.”
Joke #12037
FATHER: “Son, when I was your age, I had never kissed a girl. Now, will you be able to tell your son the same thing?”
SON: “Yes, Dad, but not with a straight face.”
Joke #12028
Last week my son in college had a very painful amputation. I cut off his allowance.
Joke #12027
When my little girl got married, I didn’t lose a daughter, I gained a son. He moved in with us.