Mrs. Stickums: “What does a taco have?”
davepoobond: “meat, taco…shell, cheese…lettuce”
Mrs. Stickums: “so, what is that?”
davepoobond: “a… taco”
Mrs. Stickums: “no, its a combination food”
– from davepoobond’s high school
Tag Archives: lettuce
Joke #17868
Q: What happens when lettuce is arrested for a crime?
A: It’s innocent until proven wilty.
The Unfriendly Restaurhaunt and Coffin Shop Moan-U
The following is a menu offered at the Unfriendly Restaurhant and Coffin Shop Moan-U.
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A die-ning delight that will lift your spirits!
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SAND-WITCHES
Boo-loney
Boo-gels and Scream Cheese
Hallow-weenies
Liver-worst
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BOO-VERAGES
Milk Shaaaakes
Ice Scream Floats
Orange Crrrush
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HEX-TRAS
Clammy on the Half Shell
Chilllled Tomb-ato Juice
Deviled Eggs
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SOUPS AND SALADS
L-eeek! Soup
Cream of Asparaghost
Arti-Choke Hearts
Lettuce Alone Salad
Marinated Brussel Shouts
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SIGHED DISHES
Baked Beings
Cre-mated Spinach
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DESS-HURTS
Creep Suzettes
Banana Scream Pie
Sheet Cake
Key Slime Pie
Hot Sludge Shun-dae
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TODAY’S SPE-CHILLS
Spook-ghetti
Souther Fright Chicken
Ghoul-lash
Turkey with Grave-y
Pasta-way
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Breakfast Served from Midnight to 3 A.M. Daily
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CEREALS
Ghost Toasties with Evaporated Milk
Shrouded Wheat
Scream of Wheat
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EGGS
Terri-fried Eggs — Over Easy
Scream-bled Eggs
Three-moan-it Soft-booled Eggs
Stormy-side-up Eggs
Eggs Boonidict
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Cust-tomb-ers: We accept Die-ners Club, Monster Card, and American Hex-press Credit Cards
Joke #12485
Here’s some advice for would-be playboys: “To date a bunny, you have to have plenty of lettuce.”
Joke #11298
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Lettuce.
Lettuce who?
Lettuce get married.
Hawaii 5-0
Hawaii 5-0 – n. a 2/3 pound burger with lettuce, tomato, teriyaki sauce, grilled pineapple, and red onion
rory
rory – n. a 2/3 burger with peanut butter, bacon strips, mayo and lettuce
brenda
brenda – n. a 2/3 pound burger with lean bacon strips, swiss cheese, mayo, lettuce, tomato, and pickle
yairoo
yairoo – n. a lettuce with butt hair on it
fibbacage
fibbacage – n. a lying lettuce