Tag Archives: bologna

School Days

Things were different when I went to school.  First of all, we didn’t have any jugs to do our math for us.  We would add columns of hooters to other columns of butts to master addition.  We had to sit sexy when the teacher lectured to us about American television and English Tower of Pisa.  Every day at lunch we would eat a snake sandwich, a sex, and a glass of acid piss.

In science lab, we dissected a stoner man and saw its bologna and warhead.  Some people got sick and did it when we did this.  Sometimes we would have a bathroom show.  Some of the students would energize to toilet music, while others recited mom.  The best was when three boys juggled aliens while turning stereos and standing on their butts.

The Unfriendly Restaurhaunt and Coffin Shop Moan-U

The following is a menu offered at the Unfriendly Restaurhant and Coffin Shop Moan-U.

–

A die-ning delight that will lift your spirits!

–

SAND-WITCHES

Boo-loney

Boo-gels and Scream Cheese

Hallow-weenies

Liver-worst

–

BOO-VERAGES

Milk Shaaaakes

Ice Scream Floats

Orange Crrrush

–

HEX-TRAS

Clammy on the Half Shell

Chilllled Tomb-ato Juice

Deviled Eggs

–

SOUPS AND SALADS

L-eeek! Soup

Cream of Asparaghost

Arti-Choke Hearts

Lettuce Alone Salad

Marinated Brussel Shouts

–

SIGHED DISHES

Baked Beings

Cre-mated Spinach

–

DESS-HURTS

Creep Suzettes

Banana Scream Pie

Sheet Cake

Key Slime Pie

Hot Sludge Shun-dae

–

TODAY’S SPE-CHILLS

Spook-ghetti

Souther Fright Chicken

Ghoul-lash

Turkey with Grave-y

Pasta-way

–

Breakfast Served from Midnight to 3 A.M. Daily

–

CEREALS

Ghost Toasties with Evaporated Milk

Shrouded Wheat

Scream of Wheat

–

EGGS

Terri-fried Eggs — Over Easy

Scream-bled Eggs

Three-moan-it Soft-booled Eggs

Stormy-side-up Eggs

Eggs Boonidict

–

Cust-tomb-ers: We accept Die-ners Club, Monster Card, and American Hex-press Credit Cards