I know a doctor who’s so cheap, every time he goes home for Christmas he charges his parents for a house call.
Tag Archives: Christmas
Joke #13183
My older sister is a real dog. Last Christmas Santa left a flea collar in her stocking.
Joke #12862
I heard a story about a husband whose wife was never pleased with any present he bought her. So one Christmas he decided to give her cash as a gift. Naturally, she exchanged it for something else.
Joke #12736
I finally found a way to get back at my postman for slow service. I mailed him his Christmas gift.
Joke #12625
A mother gave her children’s school bus driver an ideal Christmas present — a pair of ear plugs.
Joke #12554
Inflation has reduced my household to a two-party system: a New Year’s Eve Party and a Christmas Party.
Joke #12541
OVERHEARD: “Last Christmas I gave her something worth 25 dollars — a fifty-dollar bill.”
Joke #12522
The prices they get for toys these days are outrageous. Last Christmas in order to buy my daughter a dollhouse, I had to take out a mortgage on it.
Joke #12443
Everyone in the world is feeling the money crunch. This year at the North Pole, Santa Claus showed up at the unemployment office the day after Christmas.
Joke #11965
What a childhood I had! One Christmas, Santa left me a bag to wear over my head.
Joke #11457
Q: What do you call Santa’s helpers?
A: Subordinate clauses.
Joke #11444
Sister: What are you giving Mom and Dad for Christmas?
Brother: A list of everything I want!
Joke #11428
Sister: Well, how are you doing with that electronic drum set that you got for Christmas?
Brother: Great. It’s the most wonderful present I ever got.
Sister: Why’s that?
Brother: Dad pays me two dollars a week not to play it.
Joke #11426
Frank: I wish you’d only sing Christmas carols.
Megan: Why?
Frank: Because then you’d only have to sing once a year!
Joke #10748
Did you hear about the farmer who planted the metal Christmas tree farm that didn’t work out?
Now he’s out looking for the salesman who sold him 5,000 aluminum acorns.