Tag Archives: Bahrain

Quotes

Squackle.com! Mottos

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Mottos are needed when you want to boast about how good your site is.  Here’s a bunch of mottos and potential ad blurbs I thought up.  They may or may not be used at some point.

–

Mottos:

  • Squackle.com!  The Funniest Site on the Net!
  • Squackle.com!  Bitches Beware!
  • Squackle.com!  The Site That Saved the World! / The “Site” That Saved(?) “the” World!
  • Squackle.com!  Better Than Porn!
  • Squackle.com!  Annoying the World, One Person at a Time
  • Squackle.com!  Annoying the World, More Than One Person at a Time
  • Squackle.com!  Bringing You and Your Family Closer to Insanity
  • Squackle.com!  So Much Crap, So Little Time
  • Squackle.com!  70% of Our Visitors Probably Have Their Pants Around Their Ankles
  • Squackle.com!  We didn’t cut the fat!
  • Squackle.com!  One of the Funniest Sites on the Net (deprecated, but classic)
  • Squackle.com!  A Lot of Advantages
  • Squackle.com! More Visitors Than Voters in the Green Party
  • There’s a place for everything, even your mom, on Squackle.com
  • Keep Smilin’
  • Wait a second… game reviews?

Ad Blurbs:

  • Hey, fag.  Go to Squackle! www.squackle.com
  • Jo MAMA lives in Bahrain! Buy the shirt at www.squackle.com
  • I screwed jo mama after she went to this site www.squackle.com
  • There’s naked pictures of your momma on the web. Go here to see them. www.squackle.com
  • ohh The Best Part of Wakin’ Up, is screwin your mom up the assssss! www.squackle.com
  • Hey, you.  Do something productive with your meaningless life and go to this meaningless site.  It’s funny!  Tell people about it, too.
  • Squackle <—— funny site.   Tell people about it.
  • Hey you!  Got nothing to do?  Go to this site, it’s funny, and there is funny stuff there, too!  Go as soon as you can, this shit is hi-frickin-larious.  Tell people about it, too!
  • Ain’t today pretty?  Pretty boring!  Wanna get un-bored?  Go to this site, it’s funny and well worth it to go.  So go now, and tell people about it, too!
Stories

The Middle East and the World

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During the Cold War, the United States fought communist threats in Turkey and Beef, while the Soviet Union found allies in the four Middle Eastern countries of Zimbabwe and South Africa.  In 1967, Israel won the stinky poop from Syria, East Jerusalem and the West Bank from Chuck E. Cheese, and the swap meet and Sinai Peninsula from Argentina.

Israel refused to give up these territories until Arab nations recognized their right to have indoor plumbing.  Meanwhile, the PTA waged guerrilla war against Israelis both at home and abroad.  When the Soviet Union collapsed in 1991, the peace process was accelerated because everyone just wanted to sit down and eat pizza.  In 1993, a historic agreement was signed between Chuck E. Cheese and Barney the Dinosaur.  People on both sides criticized the agreement as world leaders worked hard to bring peace to the region.

In Lebanon, the government depended on a delicate balance among beer and margaritas.  When beer began to outnumber margaritas, unrest spread.  In 1975, civil war broke out in Lebanon.  Not until 1990 did Lebanese leaders finally restore some order.

In the Persian Gulf, tensions were fed by the Public Broadcasting Service showing Sesame Street.  Then, in 1980, Iraqi dictator Stinky Stewssein attacked Iran.  The war lasted eight years and both sides suffered heavy casualties.  Stewssein again acted aggressively in 1990 when he sent Iraqi troops into Bahrain.

United States President George Bush organized American, European, and Arab forces to drive Iraq out of Bahrain.  For years after the war, UN economic assing stopped Iraq from selling its oil abroad.  The goal was force Stewssein to stop making stinky stew and vegetable oil.

(C) Funny Poem, Poetry and Songs

The Rain in Bahrain

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The rain

in Bahrain

is insane

in the membrane.

It causes me pain

to see the rain

in Bahrain.

I fly in my plane

to the plains

of Maine

to escape the rain

in Bahrain.

The plains of Maine

are plain,

but they are not nearly as inane

as the rain

in Bahrain.

I’d like to go to Spain

to escape the rain

in Bahrain.

THE RAIN

IN BAHRAIN

DRIVES ME INSAAAAAAAAAANE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Prank IMs, Stupid IMs, Chat Logs

#6147: davepoobond -> Fluffy Fox

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davepoobond: Brooks…wheres my money? i know you were out last night, workin’ the streets! WHERES MY MONEY, BITCH!

Fluffy Fox: ROFL

Fluffy Fox: Hell ya!

Fluffy Fox: I was bending over ;x

Fluffy Fox: Got me some big furry cock.

Fluffy Fox: Who the fuck are you?

davepoobond: the King of Bahrain

Fluffy Fox: o_O;;

Fluffy Fox: kawaii oi?

Fluffy Fox: nani e.e

davepoobond: yes

Fluffy Fox: nani??

davepoobond: nani crackers are good

Fluffy Fox: nani is japanese for what, weridie.

davepoobond: i’m not japanese, ass

davepoobond: i’m arabian

Fluffy Fox: Lol !

davepoobond: bahrainian, to be exact

Fluffy Fox: Mike?

Fluffy Fox: Zortho rather?

davepoobond: so you Fluffy Fox go butt poop out

davepoobond: the hell

davepoobond: i’m not Zorro

Fluffy Fox: Lol!

davepoobond: what are you talking about

davepoobond: i’m the fuckin king of bahrain

Fluffy Fox: who are you?

davepoobond: king of bahrain

davepoobond: you’re funny

davepoobond: FUNNY LOOKING

davepoobond: ahahahahaha

Fluffy Fox: o_o;;

davepoobond: yeah you better o_o;; you bitch

Fluffy Fox: Tragon?

davepoobond: fluffyyyy

Fluffy Fox: Teferi?

Fluffy Fox: Mykon?

davepoobond: fluffyy fluffy

Fluffy Fox: Alomoe?

davepoobond: fox fox fox

davepoobond: do you have beer

davepoobond: infidel

Fluffy Fox: yea

davepoobond: guess what

davepoobond: do you want some more beer?

Fluffy Fox: Yes.

davepoobond: THEN GO BUY SOME!

Fluffy Fox: Yes I do.

davepoobond: ahahahaha!

Fluffy Fox: O_o;;

davepoobond: did you see the one with the Italian guys?

Fluffy Fox: o_O what?

davepoobond: it was……pizza-rific!

davepoobond: ahahahaah!

davepoobond: some Bahrainian jokes for you

davepoobond: freee

davepoobond: they say i am the funniest man in all of Bahrain

davepoobond: because if you’re funnier than me, i kill you

davepoobond: i kill you like the bitch you said you werent

Fluffy Fox: o_o

davepoobond: o_o<^>

davepoobond: oh oh

davepoobond: whats this?

davepoobond: <^>

davepoobond: ahhaah

Fluffy Fox: ,,|,,(^_^),,|,,

davepoobond: no

davepoobond: thats not right

davepoobond: you suck

davepoobond: you’re gay

davepoobond: and you poop out the wrongggg way

davepoobond: ahahhh!

davepoobond: i rhymed

davepoobond: isnt that funny?

Fluffy Fox: Ya

Fluffy Fox: Funnnny

davepoobond: no it isnt

davepoobond: you suck

davepoobond: thats why you’re gay

davepoobond: and you have to pay

Fluffy Fox: yea

davepoobond: me more mon-ay

Fluffy Fox: Im getting offline now.

davepoobond: no you’re not

davepoobond: you’re going to block me

davepoobond: and i will use all of Bahrain’s treasures to kill you

Fluffy Fox: Isn’t Bahrain that fat ass from final fantasy 9?

davepoobond: ….

davepoobond: here, we have no such things as “final fantasy 9s”

davepoobond: i dont even know how the world can have such a crazy idea

Fluffy Fox: yes you do

davepoobond: how can you have 9 final fantasys

Fluffy Fox: your Final Fantasy number 9

Fluffy Fox: all the others were rejected

Fluffy Fox: your 9th is getting gang banged.

Fluffy Fox: By a pack of savage wolves.

davepoobond: there can only be 1 final thing, and that means 1 final fantasy

davepoobond: are you leaving yet?

davepoobond: leave

davepoobond: now

Fluffy Fox: In a few

davepoobond: i order you to leave

davepoobond: NOW

davepoobond: not in a few, NOW

davepoobond: good bye, bitch. i’m leaving you, and the house you came in

Stupid IMs, Chat Logs, Prank IMs

#6143: davepoobond -> AWSSkater

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davepoobond: hello

AWSSkater: HI

davepoobond: im the king of bahrain

davepoobond: how are you

AWSSkater: me too

davepoobond: you cant be the king of bahrain, i’m the king of bahrain

AWSSkater: im fine, you?

davepoobond: you cant be me, and you cant be me, cuz me is me and you cant be me because i am me, and you are not me

AWSSkater: okay

AWSSkater: who are you?

davepoobond: told

davepoobond: you

davepoobond: king of bahrain

AWSSkater: k

davepoobond: have you ever “poked the pork?”

davepoobond: hello?

davepoobond: i asked a question

AWSSkater: in what sense

davepoobond: i’m the king of bahrain

davepoobond: WHAT DO YOU MEAN IN WHAT SENSE

davepoobond: JUST ANSWER THE DAMN QUESTION

AWSSkater: i dont know what you mean

davepoobond: i dont know what you mean by i dont know what you mean

AWSSkater: ditto

davepoobond: oh ho!

davepoobond: you use my same words against me

davepoobond: or are you talking about a Pokemon

AWSSkater: no pokemon

AWSSkater: ::barfs::

davepoobond: i outlawed them from my country

davepoobond: we were losing too much capital

davepoobond: we only get 32 dollars a year per capita

AWSSkater: oh

AWSSkater: whats your name

davepoobond: its too hard to explain

davepoobond: it starts with a s, and ends with a c

davepoobond: be scientific and call it SCAT!

AWSSkater: what is it

davepoobond: sreckinic crickinick

AWSSkater: then my name is Hugh G. Rection

davepoobond: ok

davepoobond: how do you feel about hard labor?

davepoobond: i could really use someone like you in the oil fields

AWSSkater: tis bad

davepoobond: how about hard labor with no pay, and your only clothes are thumbcuffs

AWSSkater: you’re gay

davepoobond: how DARE YOU

davepoobond: ::beat down::

davepoobond: pooooo

davepoobond: you suck

davepoobond: Kix is a cereal

davepoobond: kid tested, mother approved

AWSSkater: ::takes out an extremely large wiffle bat and beats in the head extremely violently::

AWSSkater: now what

davepoobond: …

davepoobond: how dare you

davepoobond: howww DAREEE YOUU

davepoobond: hi

AWSSkater: hello

Stupid IMs, Chat Logs

#7: AWSSkater -> SheMaleHo

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AWSSkater: i need a new one

SheMaleHo: your “Moo Moo’s” a fag!!!

SheMaleHo: i killed it and nailed it to a crucifix!!!

AWSSkater: FAGGOT

AWSSkater: are you talking to cait?

SheMaleHo: then i barbequed it

SheMaleHo: no

SheMaleHo: im watching you

AWSSkater: ask her why it keeps saying i cant talk to her

SheMaleHo: whA?

SheMaleHo: i can see you out my window…

AWSSkater: cool

AWSSkater: what am i doing

SheMaleHo: i nailed “Moo Moo’s” head on the hood of my car

AWSSkater: what room am i in

SheMaleHo: theone with the computer

SheMaleHo: am i right?

AWSSkater: yes

AWSSkater: and what room is that

SheMaleHo: the one with the keyboard in it

SheMaleHo: it also has a door

SheMaleHo: am i right?

AWSSkater: caits name doesnt work anymore

SheMaleHo: your house is brown

AWSSkater: yes

AWSSkater: you cheated

SheMaleHo: and its on a corner

AWSSkater: you cheated again

SheMaleHo: your upstairs

SheMaleHo: your typing from your bed

AWSSkater: yes

AWSSkater: you’re still cheating

SheMaleHo: you have long black hair

SheMaleHo: ooooh you look so nice

AWSSkater: anything else you’d like to add

AWSSkater: when is my birthday?

SheMaleHo: im gonna feel you….

SheMaleHo: i dont know, i can just see you

AWSSkater: what color is my shirt

SheMaleHo: you know what color it is

AWSSkater: yes, but do you

SheMaleHo: of course! i can see you silly

SheMaleHo: oooh im taking off my pants to look at you

AWSSkater: you’re gay

SheMaleHo: you got it! :-*

AWSSkater: wow

AWSSkater: im right

SheMaleHo: i wish you had no shirt

SheMaleHo: 😛

AWSSkater: but i do

AWSSkater: ask cait why i cant talk to her, i know you can

SheMaleHo: i know

SheMaleHo: i can?

AWSSkater: unless this is her in disguise

AWSSkater: she tricked me like that before, you know

AWSSkater: well she didnt trick me

SheMaleHo: this isnt a trick

AWSSkater: i knew it was her

SheMaleHo: take off your shirt

SheMaleHo: oh c’mon

AWSSkater: um…

AWSSkater: no?

SheMaleHo: my pants are already off, dont waste my time

AWSSkater: im back, ugly

SheMaleHo: i like it when you talk dirty

AWSSkater: oh

AWSSkater: okay

SheMaleHo: say it again

AWSSkater: okay

SheMaleHo: Cryin’ Ryan

AWSSkater: shutup

AWSSkater: Trunks Briefs

SheMaleHo: Cryyyyyyyin’ Ryyyyyyyyan

AWSSkater: ho

SheMaleHo: oooh, Briefs, you wear briefs?

AWSSkater: no actually i wear boxers

AWSSkater: either you keep asking cait stuff or you are her in disguise,
which is it

SheMaleHo: disquise?

SheMaleHo: ooooh kinky, role playing

AWSSkater: what?

SheMaleHo: ok, ill me the bad dog and you be my master, discipline me

AWSSkater: um…

AWSSkater: go in the corner while i piss on your head

SheMaleHo: soooo kinky

AWSSkater: you’re weird

SheMaleHo: lemme get the whip and handcuffs

AWSSkater: that would be okay if you were female, but you arent

AWSSkater: as far as i know

SheMaleHo: y’know, i have a dog, i can bring him over with some whipped cream and peanut butter

AWSSkater: that’s okay

SheMaleHo: we can be a sandwich!

AWSSkater: no

SheMaleHo: well…still want my thong?

AWSSkater: what?

AWSSkater: you scare me

SheMaleHo: im going to throw my purple thong at your window, catch it

AWSSkater: k

SheMaleHo: wait, ill keep them

SheMaleHo: theyre edible

AWSSkater: k

SheMaleHo: and im hungry

AWSSkater: lol

AWSSkater: how many dogs do i have>

AWSSkater: ?

SheMaleHo: oh, Caaiiiiite

AWSSkater: shutup

SheMaleHo: OMG!!! shes flashing me again!

AWSSkater: shutup

SheMaleHo: theres a sign

SheMaleHo: it says….I…..want….you….Ch…whats that?

SheMaleHo: her boob is blocking it

AWSSkater: what?

SheMaleHo: Ch….r….i…damn nipple

SheMaleHo: Chris!

SheMaleHo: me!

AWSSkater: shutup

SheMaleHo: whats the matter Cryin’ Ryan

SheMaleHo: jealous?

AWSSkater: nothing of that sort is happening so it doesnt matter

SheMaleHo: it is

AWSSkater: riiiiigggghhhht, and my name is blowjob

SheMaleHo: oooooooooh sexy

AWSSkater: hey

AWSSkater: no

SheMaleHo: come over to my place, my nickname is…snoow blow

AWSSkater: LOL

AWSSkater: how many cats do i have

SheMaleHo: lemme count

SheMaleHo: hmmmm

SheMaleHo: hmmm

SheMaleHo: not counting the one i nailed to a crucufix…1…

SheMaleHo: Moo moo and Mickey

SheMaleHo: or Kittie

SheMaleHo: whatever

AWSSkater: what color is mickey

SheMaleHo: ummm…

AWSSkater: lol

SheMaleHo: Dark brown…and black striped

SheMaleHo: Ewwww, whats that scab on his head?

AWSSkater: scap is a funny word

SheMaleHo: so is homo…oh wait

AWSSkater: here is a tough question

AWSSkater: where is my birthmark

SheMaleHo: take off all your clothes first

SheMaleHo: i think i see it on your…wait…im to distracted by Caites boob

SheMaleHo: wait…its on…your arm i think

SheMaleHo: am i right?

AWSSkater: yeah

AWSSkater: where

SheMaleHo: Caite…

AWSSkater: what

SheMaleHo: nipple

SheMaleHo: nipple

AWSSkater: boobie

SheMaleHo: nipple

AWSSkater: boobie

SheMaleHo: y’know…im actually…your uncle

SheMaleHo: your long lost uncle

SheMaleHo: and im attracted to you….im a hillbilly

AWSSkater: ::says in a hillbilly accent:: get on yer knees and take down them suspender boy!!

SheMaleHo: Ok sailor!!!

AWSSkater: lol

AWSSkater: or are you a female

AWSSkater: im not sure

SheMaleHo: well lets see….im your uncle!! so could i be male…or female

AWSSkater: lol

AWSSkater: im messing around

SheMaleHo: want some weed from your ol’ uncle?

SheMaleHo: its the herb of the earth

AWSSkater: i hate drugs

SheMaleHo: the herb will set your mind free!, man!!!

AWSSkater: so will spinning around in circles

SheMaleHo: so is doing anal…

AWSSkater: weird

SheMaleHo: you..think anal is weird?

SheMaleHo: obviously youve never tried it

SheMaleHo: come over to my house

SheMaleHo: its the pink frilly one on fudgepacker avenue

AWSSkater: i dont pack fudge

AWSSkater: im not a poopie dick

AWSSkater: by the way, how do you see my room with the curtain closed

SheMaleHo: im your uncle…Clark Kent, i have X-ray Vision

AWSSkater: clark kent doesnt have X-ray vision

SheMaleHo: who would know better? Clark Kent or you Cryin’ Ryan?

AWSSkater: who would know what better

SheMaleHo: who would know better if i had X-ray vision?

SheMaleHo: to tell you a secret, Im superman

SheMaleHo: doesnt it all make sense?

AWSSkater: yeah, but clark kent doesnt have x-ray vision only superman

SheMaleHo: i live in the country, so im a hilbilly, i wear redish tights
so i must have a purple thong SOMEWHERE, and i can see through your curtains

AWSSkater: so that makes you very weird

SheMaleHo: im a hillbilly and i have a shotgun

AWSSkater: what color is the bracelet im wearing

SheMaleHo: hmmmm

SheMaleHo: X-ray visios is kinda color blind but lemme try

AWSSkater: okay

SheMaleHo: its kinda silver…

SheMaleHo: with a purplish tint

SheMaleHo: am i right?

AWSSkater: yes

AWSSkater: actaully pink

AWSSkater: what color are my eyes

SheMaleHo: hmmmm

SheMaleHo: purple…right?

AWSSkater: no

SheMaleHo: oh wait, i was staring at Caites nipple again, sorry

SheMaleHo: brown

AWSSkater: lol

AWSSkater: what color is my real hair

SheMaleHo: hmmmm

SheMaleHo: medium brown

SheMaleHo: just like your pubes…i mean!! your…

AWSSkater: lol

AWSSkater: now you wont know stuff, cait signed off

SheMaleHo: she was online?

AWSSkater: maybe

SheMaleHo: puuuubes

SheMaleHo: nipple

SheMaleHo: Cryin’ Ryan

AWSSkater: that was an old nickname, you dont have to call me that anymore

SheMaleHo: im related to the king of Bahrain

AWSSkater: hey

AWSSkater: i know him

AWSSkater: the poo guy

SheMaleHo: Clark Kents, the hillbilly, purple thong wearing, attracted to his nephew cryin Ryan, prince of Bahrain

AWSSkater: hehe

AWSSkater: so you know the poo guy too

AWSSkater: thats probably you

SheMaleHo: oh yes

SheMaleHo: hes a VERY good freind

AWSSkater: the guy i beat with a wifflle ball bat

SheMaleHo: why did you do that?

SheMaleHo: hes the king of Bahrain!

SheMaleHo: you cant do that to him!!!

AWSSkater: but i did

SheMaleHo: this is an outrage! you must come to my house for your….punishment :Þ

AWSSkater: where do you live then

SheMaleHo: Bahrain but a ihave a house…near you

AWSSkater: where is that

SheMaleHo: its right next to Saudi Arabia, its too small to be on the map anyway

AWSSkater: that’s pretty far away

SheMaleHo: 600 people live there

AWSSkater: lol