When you’re thirsty, you get a drink.
When you gotta pee, you go to the bathroom.
When you vote for assemblies commisioner, vote for
DAVEPOOBOND
Now go wash your hands.
Category Archives: (C) Funny Poem
Little Old Lady
Little old lady
Who lived in a shoe
She had so many kids
Her uterus fell out.
Roses are Red…
Roses are Red,
Violets are Blue,
Some poems rhyme,
This one doesn’t you wanker
The Flying Poop Poem
The night was dark,
The sky was blue,
Around the corner
The poop wagon flew,
A shot was fired,
A gun was heard,
And a man was killed
By a flying turd.
Pickle? Pickle!
There once was a man from Mantucket.
But he didn’t like Mantucket
So he went to Disney World
He then road all day and all night
To catch the masked porno stealer!
Die porno stealer he said
And he bashed the porno stealers nuts in with a shovel!
The porno man died
So Mr. Guy went back to Mantucket
And killed everyone cause he hated poor people.
Mantucket is the ghetto! God dam ghettoians!
The Two Monkeys
A song a about two monkeys,
sitting on a branch,
picking each others backs
and making weied monkey sounds all day..
and slit the other ones throat
and made its fur into a fur coat
and sold it onto Ebay
Wonder Bra
Old men,
with baggy saggy tits,
are stupid,
and Alchololics..
They need a Wonderbra,
to fully suppoort
their moldy nasty
old nipples..
Lily Had a Bell
Lily Lily had a Bell,
Lilly lilly rung it,
Lily Lily went to hell
=P
I Made Myself a Snowball
I made myself a snowball,
as perfect as could be,
I thought I’d keep it as a pet,
and let it sleep with me.
I made it some pajamas,
and a pillow for its head,
Then last night it ran away,
but first it wet the bed.
A Cool Nursery Rhyme
Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet
eating her curds and whey
Along came a spider
who sat down beside her
And said, “Plenty of cholesterol, I’d say.”
An Updated Poem
Roses are red,
Violets are blue.
Sugar is sweet,
and expensive too.
School Classmates
You can tell a freshman,
by his slap-happy look.
You tell a sophomore,
because he carries a comic book.
You can tell a junior,
by his debonair and such.
You tell a senior,
but you can’t tell him much.
Short Poem Time
Hickory dickory dock,
The elephant ran up the clock.
The clock is being repaired.
Valentine To Teach
Dear Teach,
Roses are red,
Violets aren’t gray,
I gave you this card,
Now give me an A.
With love,
Your favorite student.
Valentine To Jill
Dear Jill,
Roses are red,
Tulips are pink,
If you’d don’t go out with me,
You’re a big fink!
With all my affection,
Bill