The Klu Klux Clan doesn’t fool me…it’s actually an evil alien from the planet Canada that were dropped here because a pregnant alien mother went to take a shit in a space and by accident let the baby fly out of her ass. Thats why the KKK hates the color black because there brothers were a big piece of shit. The baby fell onto an unknown island called “Australia” and were transferred, underwater by humpback whales and blowfish. They landed in a place only known to them as Trailer Town and thrived there until they became sheet-headed retards. Now they plot to take over the earth and eat beans forever!
All posts by Holmes
Canada: The Hippi and The Canadian Border Hopper’s Theory
Hippi’s that live in your garbage with the Canadian Border hoppers that look into your garbage finding stuff about you and then making you smoke weed and buy evil maple syrup which turns your mind into a toilet, it’s true!
The Bus Driver Theory
hmm…damn bus drivers, think they can drive in and try to take over the damn world, it’s a consipracy, see: they start out as bus drivers making people 1 minute late for school, then they move onto 2 minutes, then 3 then next thing you know it’s an hour late. So that bus drivers around the world can make people so late that the world will just collapse because the president will be late and people running electricity companys will be late so the whole worlld won’t have electricity and then, they move in, they call there special Barney Fan Special forces which destroys the minds of people…
Squackle: Insanity Is Only The Beginning
davepoobond vs. blowthetoad 2
Pictures made by stimpyismyname.
#7652: Bklynzballer -> Holmes
This took place on July 25, 2001.
–
Bklynzballer: why are you suck a d*ck
Bklynzballer: tracy said she wants ure mom….IN BED!……
Holmes: i want your mom
Holmes: in bed
Holmes: shes hot
Bklynzballer: sure…
Bklynzballer: anytime..
Holmes: we’ll trade tommorow
Holmes: k?
Holmes: ben is going to kick your ass
Bklynzballer: sure he is..
Holmes: so is james
Bklynzballer: i fucked ihis ass all night
Holmes: hey: It’s adam and eve not adam and steve
Bklynzballer: thats right
Holmes: your nasty i bet you screwed a dog before too
Bklynzballer: thats right
Bklynzballer: and bens ass
Holmes: how about a half cat and half dog
Bklynzballer: yup
Bklynzballer: catdog
Holmes: which end did you screw
Bklynzballer: i made them staight
Holmes: did you screw the dog or did you screw the cat
Bklynzballer: both
Holmes: which one was first
Holmes: you man whore! i just found out your a nymphomaniac
Holmes: ha you don’t even know what that word means do you
Bklynzballer: thats rite
Holmes: it means your GAY, you hear me? G-A-Y
Holmes: YOUR MOTHER COULDN”T EVEN LOVE YOU, thats how gay you are
#7650: Bklynzballer -> Holmes
This took place on July 20, 2001.
–
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Holmes: keep sending it
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Holmes: once more
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Holmes: come on do it faster
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Holmes: FASTER
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Holmes: slow poke
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Holmes: ugh my granny can type faster then you can
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Bklynzballer: ure grannys dead
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Holmes: yeah how embarrasing is that for you
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Holmes: she’s dead and she can type faster then you
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Holmes: zzzz i’m falling asleep between im’s
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Holmes: oh sorry are you still talking?
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
Bklynzballer: cuz u are a fucking fag
(Bklynzballer got booted for IMing too fast)
schools out
OnlineHost: *** You are in “schools out”. ***
Holmes: sup
HeLLrAzOr: i just laughed at yours and daniels jokes
Bklynzballer: sure sure..
Bklynzballer: u sed he was a fag
Holmes: O.o i’m tellin daniel
Redfoxkid: i neva heard mike make fun of him it was u felix
Holmes: daniel’s my boy
Holmes: my dawg
Bklynzballer: william u protecting him
Bklynzballer: hahahahaha
HeLLrAzOr: no cuz its true u da lyer
Holmes: daniel will whoop your ass to grass and make you fall on your ass
Bklynzballer: man …me aron and tommy hav sum thing to do hehehehe
HeLLrAzOr: eh…
Bklynzballer: aron and tommy are ova.
Bklynzballer: mr. “HELL RAZOR” nice profile
Redfoxkid: who da hell is Holmes
Holmes: no way i heard aron biatch slapped tommy and tommy cried
Holmes: stfu don’t talk in that tone
HeLLrAzOr: i dont have 1 u lya
Bklynzballer: yes u do
Bklynzballer: it says location….
Bklynzballer: ……
Holmes: i will whoop you
HeLLrAzOr: so………
Bklynzballer: ::cough:: gay::cough::
Bklynzballer: tommy rote that
HeLLrAzOr: cough:: u fag::
Redfoxkid: who is Holmes
Holmes: hey tommy you got a cough
Holmes: SHUT UP
HeLLrAzOr: tommy is at your house?
Bklynzballer: so is aron..
Holmes: really
Bklynzballer: we all came wer goin to wendys now
HeLLrAzOr: good f u
Redfoxkid: bull shit
Bklynzballer: willy…shutup
Holmes: yeah will how many times do i have to tell you
Bklynzballer: how much u wanna bet..
HeLLrAzOr: u r a user
Bklynzballer: i used u mike for wut?
Redfoxkid: u jus wanna make people jealous
Bklynzballer: ure just mad wer not ure friend
Holmes: thats not cool
Bklynzballer: cuz u couldnt take daniels joke
HeLLrAzOr: no u used me 4 ma games and to hav friendz or u get da shit beatin out of u like in your old
Bklynzballer: i dont get it …daniel is the one who made up mikerreese..
HeLLrAzOr: skool
Bklynzballer: yea rite…who told u that..mike mineo??
HeLLrAzOr: no
Redfoxkid: u think ur better dan every one
Bklynzballer: hahahahahaha…
HeLLrAzOr: him and his cuz
Holmes: mikerreese..what a cool name i’m naming my kid that
HeLLrAzOr: u made dat up
Bklynzballer: dont worry…u kno
Holmes: yeah red i do
Bklynzballer: everyone in the older grades got the song that makes fun of you
Redfoxkid: u kno wat
Bklynzballer: so…
Bklynzballer: ahhaha
Holmes: shut up thats wat
Holmes: frickin punk
Holmes: i’m going to hunt you down
Redfoxkid: ha ha ha ha
HeLLrAzOr: holmes r u rory
Holmes: yeah
Holmes: why
HeLLrAzOr: is it true dat all da grades hav a song bout me?
Holmes: sorry can’t say shit like that
Holmes: secret
HeLLrAzOr: dan u do
Holmes: whatever
Holmes: will SHUT UP
Holmes: i’m outta this joint
HeLLrAzOr: i m sick of dis fuckin kid
Holmes: bye
#7647: Bklynzballer -> Holmes
This took place on July 12, 2001.
–
Bklynzballer: did u see me in school>?
Holmes: yes
Bklynzballer: i started a riot
Bklynzballer: mike…i think your hott…
Holmes: o
Bklynzballer: <—tracy
Bklynzballer: u have a tight butt
Bklynzballer: hows my butt?
Holmes: no comment
Bklynzballer: this is tracy not mike
Bklynzballer: im at miikes house
Holmes: oh
Holmes: i see
Bklynzballer: i know what u sed about me
Holmes: i thought you were talking to mike
Bklynzballer: u said i have a ass like a mule
Bklynzballer: even though mike thinks too
Holmes: yea
Bklynzballer: want a blow job>?
Bklynzballer: MIKE DOESNT CARE
Bklynzballer: hes in the bathroom now
Holmes: umm
Holmes: my moms right behind me
Holmes: thanks alot
Bklynzballer: no prob..
Bklynzballer: so u want or not?
Holmes: yeah come over my house
Holmes: NOW
Holmes: NOW
Bklynzballer: i want you to pork me like a dogg
Bklynzballer: woof woof.
Bklynzballer: mikes taking a shit
Holmes: did you pork him
Holmes: up the butt?
Bklynzballer: yup
Bklynzballer: he gott my butt
Bklynzballer: but keep it between me and you
Bklynzballer: he has a small dick
Bklynzballer: 6 inches
Bklynzballer: i hope u have bettr
Holmes: 15 inches
Bklynzballer: k..much better
Bklynzballer: mike was scared to f*** me
Holmes: ha
Holmes: jmikes such a pussy
Holmes: he’s so fucking gay
Bklynzballer: i told him i dont like rubber
Bklynzballer: hes like well i dunt want a baby
Holmes: i heard his dad raped him when he was young
Bklynzballer: yea ,,,its true.
Bklynzballer: i fucked his dad
Holmes: and his dad made him bend over while he spanked him
Bklynzballer: lol…seriously…
Bklynzballer: dont tell his mom..
Bklynzballer: im gunna fuck u like a hot dog
Bklynzballer: ask ure mom if she wants sumz?
Holmes: umm
Holmes: ok
Holmes: i’ll ask her
Bklynzballer: ok
Holmes: she said yes
Bklynzballer: sure my pleasure
Holmes: your a whore
Bklynzballer: exactly
Holmes: can i pay you 20 bucks to screw a shrew
Bklynzballer: sure
Holmes: ok
Holmes: screw one
Holmes: take pictures and send them to me
Holmes: well?
Holmes: any pictures yet?
Holmes: well?
Holmes: COME ON
Holmes: SCREW THAT SHREW GOOD
#7642: Bklynzballer -> Holmes
This took place on July 8, 2001
–
Bklynzballer: wer u in school?
Holmes: no
Holmes: i smoked up
Holmes: shot up
Holmes: drank up
Holmes: and sniffed up
Holmes: oh man
Holmes: i’m wasted
Holmes: uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
Holmes: gghhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Holmes: why is the sky spinning
Holmes: whos talking!
Holmes: WHAT THE HECK IS THE ELEPHANT DOING IN MY PANTS
Holmes: OMG it’s the milkman coming back to haunt me!
Holmes: THE BOOGIE MAN WANTS MY BRAINS
#7639: Bklynzballer -> Holmes
This took place on July 8, 2001.
–
Bklynzballer: so wer not friends
Holmes: yeah we are that wa smy friend before
Bklynzballer: oo
Bklynzballer: i didnt see u today
Holmes: yeah
Holmes: you know how it is
Holmes: ,marijuana and drugs get to your head
Holmes: so you skip school
Bklynzballer: yup
Bklynzballer: son…tracy gave me head this morning
Holmes: and do the macarena without pants in your living room listening to ricky martin and blasting it on loud making wierd funny noises, you know what i mean?
Holmes: she did? wow
Bklynzballer: really
Bklynzballer: then i dumped her
Holmes: wow
Holmes: that sucks
Bklynzballer: ben is getting jumped
Holmes: O.o
Holmes: cooool
Holmes: thats so col
Holmes: cool*
Bklynzballer: im gunna kick his fucking asss
Holmes: ouch
Bklynzballer: arent u his friend?
Holmes: yeah but friends beat up friends
Bklynzballer: right….like how i beat u up
Holmes: haven’t you heard the circle of friends rules?
Holmes: no
Bklynzballer: im the strongest in our class.
Holmes: uh huh
Bklynzballer: am i black?
Bklynzballer: u hav a pic of me?
Holmes: no
Bklynzballer: am i white?
Holmes: your blackinese
Bklynzballer: no im not
Bklynzballer:
Holmes: fine your really half colombian, half australian and half estupido
Bklynzballer: seriously…
Holmes: estupido is a southern russian town where few people come from
Holmes: i[‘m serious
#7630: Bklynzballer -> Holmes
This took place on July 7, 2001
–
Bklynzballer: yo mike….wutup?
Holmes: nothin much what up with you?
Bklynzballer: nuttin….me and tracy went to the bathroom
Holmes: wow bounce wit me dawg!
Bklynzballer: lol….we worked with rubber…hehehehe
Bklynzballer: u speak to her?
Holmes: nah sick today
Bklynzballer: THATS WHY I DIDNT SEE YOU
Holmes: yeah no shit
Bklynzballer: ashley wants to date you
Holmes: eww tell that bicth to bounce
Bklynzballer: lol
Bklynzballer: i told her you would come over today …with …..RUBBER
Holmes: what’d that biatch say
Bklynzballer: she said for real in a real geaky tone ..i said no shit
Holmes: shes a man-whore
Bklynzballer: my little friend cALLED you yesterday
Bklynzballer: did you hear a little kid saying is holmes there lol?
Holmes: yup
Bklynzballer: thatz zack…neighbor
Bklynzballer: wut you say?
Holmes: nothin
Bklynzballer: oo
Holmes: SCARED THE CRAP OUTTA ME THOUGHT IT WAS A PRANK CALLER
Bklynzballer: he said your answer machine was gay…..
Holmes: sorry for caps
Bklynzballer: lol
Holmes: yeah it’s gay
Holmes: i deleted the message
Holmes: i’ll get your playboys tommorow
Holmes: almost forogt about em
Bklynzballer: i got chyna
Holmes: wtf is chyna
Bklynzballer: wwf superstar chyna
Holmes: o her
Bklynzballer: yup….she looks like ashley
Bklynzballer: lol….man im gettin my money back
Bklynzballer: unless you want it
Holmes: nah
Bklynzballer: k
Bklynzballer: me and tracy are going to hit it off
Holmes: dawg that is so cooool…you gettin that ass on ur dick
Holmes: ?
Bklynzballer: yup…dam rite
Bklynzballer: comeova man
Holmes: dayammmmmmmmn bounce wit me
Bklynzballer: tracys ova
Holmes: she just came
Bklynzballer: yea…….shes gunna blow me…yo i swear
Bklynzballer: no one home
Holmes: holy shit
Holmes: and you want my ass there?
Bklynzballer: your gunna film it
Holmes: lol my video cameras busted, remeber that shit? lol i never seen you flip so much
Bklynzballer: i kno
Holmes: you owe me a new one, wanna-be-johnny-knoxville
Bklynzballer: whos ure best friend in school?
Holmes: Ben, that kid that sits in your math class, you guys haven’t chilled together though, you should
Bklynzballer: mine is tracys ass…which im feeling now….
Holmes: damn! put it on your dick and bounce wit it
Bklynzballer: ben acts queer
Bklynzballer: no fence to u….i just dont like him
Holmes: o well
Holmes: not the end of the world
Bklynzballer: i kno
Holmes: whats tracy doin now
Bklynzballer: werrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr fucking
Bklynzballer: dude ……i owe u so many things
Bklynzballer: im not a virgin im not a virgin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Holmes: no shit, like that noteboook you busted up by smashing it on your head
Holmes: great goin, genius
Bklynzballer: jeez…i cant remeber all this shit wut else
Holmes: man the noteboook must have knocked your brain out!
Bklynzballer: son…this sex buissness hurts..
Holmes: take it like a man
Bklynzballer: wut else did i fuck up
Holmes: your head
Bklynzballer: lol…u ever have sex?
Holmes: DUH! of course
Bklynzballer: wit who
Holmes: your mom lol
Holmes: just playin with you dude
Bklynzballer: grrrrrrrrrrrr…………
Bklynzballer: lol
Holmes: a girl named stephany back in 9th grade
Bklynzballer: dude…..9th grade?
Bklynzballer: shit
Holmes: yea
Holmes: bounce wit me
Bklynzballer: wut else did i break of yours?
Holmes: my eminem cd
Holmes: you almost broke my fan
Bklynzballer: o yea….eminem sucks anyways….good thing i broke it
Holmes: biatch that ain’t the point! it was my cd
Bklynzballer: lol hehehe
Bklynzballer: crap how i can brake things…owell…
Bklynzballer: didnt i almost brake your cd player?
Holmes: ALMOST!
Holmes: HA
Holmes: you did!
Holmes: broke the fast forward button
Bklynzballer: wow….next on my hitlist is ……ps2
Holmes: you bust my ps2 and i’ll bust a cap
Bklynzballer: hehehehe
Bklynzballer: son…i can bust you up
Bklynzballer: dam….dude…zacks here
Holmes: who the hell is zack
Bklynzballer: hey mike..zack here
Bklynzballer: the kid you wer talking to yesterday
Holmes: oh
Bklynzballer: how many lines you have?
Holmes: lines?
Bklynzballer: phone lines
Holmes: 2
Bklynzballer: zacks gunna call you now….lol hehehe
Bklynzballer: k?
Bklynzballer: i have to go bye
#7629: Bklynzballer -> Holmes
Note: Holmes doesnt know how Bklynzballer got his sn. This took place on July 6, 2001.
This guy Bklynzballer was really a screwed up fella. We had a lot of stuff from him that was just IMs and chat rooms stuff. Starting from this post, you’ll go through each day as the things happened. We don’t know how, but he got Holmes’s sn first..this is everything we have about him. We don’t know if he thought we were actual people he knew or if he was bullshitting us the whole time…
–
Bklynzballer: want a pic of my char?
Holmes: why
Bklynzballer: this is mike from school
Holmes: seriously
Holmes: ?
Bklynzballer: yea
Holmes: howd you get the sn
Bklynzballer: i just found you in my buddyslist
Bklynzballer: so…you going to school tommorrow
Holmes: oh
Holmes: yeah
Holmes: so i’ll see you 5th period?
Holmes: ?
Bklynzballer: yea
Bklynzballer: so who do you like
Bklynzballer: like girls in school
Holmes: i like tracy
Holmes: shes got an ass like a mule
Bklynzballer: ewwww
Bklynzballer: sick f***
Bklynzballer: i like ashley
Bklynzballer: she has tits like a dog….
Holmes: EW that bitch has a beard of pimples
Bklynzballer: lol…just kidding
Holmes: i was about to say
Bklynzballer: i dont know why but tracy asked me out
Holmes: really? what’d you say?
Bklynzballer: i said k
Bklynzballer: were going out friday
Holmes: damn try to save some for me
Bklynzballer: im going to get the ass on my dick
Holmes: during spanish she passed a note saying “tengo un regallo para tu”, i dunno what that means…
Holmes: you go boy-eeee!
Bklynzballer: hehehe
Holmes: makes me wish i hadn’t slept in spanish class
Bklynzballer: it means she has something for you
Holmes: oh
Holmes: well good to know
Bklynzballer: man…well im going grab that ass all night
Bklynzballer: bounce wit me
Holmes: ouch shes going to be hurtin
Bklynzballer: i knoe
Bklynzballer: shes coming over friday too!
Bklynzballer: she said she wants to see my room
Holmes: wow! i’ll bet you’ll show her something more won’t you…like your closet
Bklynzballer: she wants me bad
Bklynzballer: tell tracy tommorrow if she is ready for our date
Holmes: man i wish i hadn’t said she was a bitch by accident infront of her friends
Holmes: alright
Bklynzballer: tell…im hard
Bklynzballer: yo…im bringing a condum to school
Holmes: show it to me duroing lunch
Bklynzballer: kk
Bklynzballer: im going to tell her for me and her to go to the bathroom
Holmes: do you want your playboys on friday too?
Holmes: ok will do
Bklynzballer: yup
Holmes: i got 3 extra just for you
Bklynzballer: giv me a pic of her so i can jerk off
Holmes: wow jeeze some things shouldn’t be told to friends
Bklynzballer: lol
Bklynzballer: send me pic of her now!
Bklynzballer: ol.
Bklynzballer: i wanna get my freak on
Holmes: damn you know my scanners busted
Bklynzballer: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!grrrrrrrr
Holmes: yeah i know, i’m about to bust it open
Bklynzballer: fuck….come to my house
Holmes: nah i’m playin playstation 2 and lookin at some porno
Bklynzballer: dam…
Holmes: nothing like a vibrating controler on your lap
Bklynzballer: i just got a new game for ps2
Bklynzballer: winter sport x-games
Holmes: lol i thought you didn’t have ps2
Bklynzballer: i just got it
Bklynzballer: duh
Holmes: oh
Holmes: lucky bastard
Holmes: i had to wait for 3 months
Holmes: since i reserved it
Bklynzballer: yo holmes….whats tracys #
Bklynzballer: dam…she wants to go out but no # grrrr
Holmes: damn that bitch hates me why would i have her number
Holmes: ask her tommorow
Bklynzballer: shes my next g/f dick
Holmes: tel her i said hi
Holmes: sorry but she can be a bitch
Bklynzballer: yes i will do
Bklynzballer: im gonna get her like a animal
Holmes: good
Bklynzballer: what grade are we again?
Bklynzballer: lol
Holmes: lol you were always an idiot, 11th DUmbass
Bklynzballer: i slept everytime in school.
Bklynzballer: o ya
Bklynzballer: hehehe
Holmes: no shit you stayed back once in 5th grade
Bklynzballer: dont remind please…
Bklynzballer: lol
Bklynzballer: i got myself a car
Holmes: quit bullshiting
Bklynzballer: nah…but im getting one
Bklynzballer: im thinking about buying a mercedes benz
Holmes: suuuure what is it? a BMW?
Holmes: HA
Holmes: lets see if your broke ass could afford that
Bklynzballer: yo…dont diss how broke i am
Bklynzballer: im richer than you dick
Holmes: well you got tracy
Bklynzballer: i know….hehe
Holmes: crap i gtg
Bklynzballer: yo holmes giv me your #
Holmes: 232-6797
Bklynzballer: l8er
Bklynzballer: area code
Holmes: l8ter
Holmes: dumb ass! how do you not know our area code?
Bklynzballer: lol..i cant remeber
Holmes: you should have stayed back in 9th grade
Holmes: 860
Holmes: jeeze
Bklynzballer: lol im gunna call you kno3
Holmes: i will bitch slap you tommorow
Bklynzballer: is your mom home?
Holmes: k call me in 30 minutes
Holmes: nah
Holmes: working
Bklynzballer: im gunna be like yo is holmes there
Holmes: aiight
Bklynzballer: where state do i liv in?
Bklynzballer: lol hehehehe
Holmes: seriously dude, do you have amnesia?
Bklynzballer: im so dumb
Bklynzballer: nah im just playing
Holmes: about to say
Holmes: well see ya later
Bklynzballer: what state you live in?
Holmes: ugh dude conn.
Holmes: BYE
Bklynzballer: lol
Dacky Flipbook
All pictures but 3 made by Adman. Original Dacky made by Fajita Bum.