That Scary Hand
Tag Archives: hand
Quote #22148
::Stephen looks at a closed case of cologne.::
Stephen: Oh, Gucci?
::Stephen reaches forward to grab the cologne but his hand is blocked by the plastic locked door.::
Stephen: Oh, what? I thought it was open! It looked like it ended right above!
::Stephen proceeds to cover up how dumb he was to do that, but Ely and I just keep laughing at him.::
– at davepoobond’s job, 5/30/2007
Joke #21856
Q: What qualifies as good behavior in a ghetto school?
A: Raising your hand before you pop a cap in the teacher.
komustadoz
komustadoz – v. to try and put a pen back in its cap but you end up just stabbing your hand instead.
Quote #21103
Guy 1: “you pussy! raise your hand!”
::Guy 1 throws a pen at Guy 2::
Guy 1: “you pussy! raise your hand!”
::Guy 2 picks up pen::
Guy 2: “my pen”
– from davepoobond’s high school
Am I an Introvert or an Extrovert?
Are you an introvert or an extrovert? Answer the next 10 questions, and tally up your results at the end to see your fate.
Loading ...–
Loading ...–
Loading ...–
Loading ...–
Loading ...–
Loading ...–
Loading ...–
Loading ...–
Loading ...–
Loading ...
Total up how many of each Introvert and Extrovert answers you’ve selected.
If you’ve chosen more answers that are marked as Introvert, then you’re a loner. Get some friends. Or play volleyball.
If you selected more answers that are marked as Extrovert, then you’re an asshole. You might want to keep yourself a little contained, you try-hard.
If you chose more of the third answer in this quiz, then you are either extremely lame or really really crazy.
Quote #20262
::writing with his left hand::
“Left hand. I can’t write well with it. Look at this shitty writing. Relationship between race, intelligence, and personality.”
– davepoobond
Quote #20252
“i woke up with no boxers on, after losing my digi camera, and my hand hurts to the point that i cant really move it that well”
– from the internet
Masturbata
Parody of Los Del Rio – Macarena
by Adam Sandler
–
Sitting in my house, and I know that I’m alone,
Feeling kinda horny, got a jingle in my bone
Go and grab a Penthouse it’s the one with Sharon Stone
Hey Masturbata!
I go a little faster and its feeling kind of nice,
Once ain’t enough so I have to do it twice
If you wanna spank the monkey I can give you good advice
Hey Masturbata!
I use some baby oil or a little Vaseline,
Laying down a towel so I keep my carpet clean
Never shake my hand cause you don’t know where its been
Hey Masturbata!
I do it in the car when I’m driving down the street,
One hand on the wheel and the other on my meat
I can’t get out the car cause I’m sticking to the seat
Hey Masturbata!
Since I was a kid I have been a masturbater,
Choke the chicken; hum the knob, squeezing the tomato
I’ve looked at Ms. November now I’m gonna decorate her
Hey, Masturbata!
Buffing the banana, Mr. Lizard shaking bacon,
Pounding on the flounder and its mayonnaise I’m makin’.
Spank the frank, wax the carrot, god my hand is achin’.
Hey, Masturbata!
Joke #18277
CANNIBAL TEACHER: “Why should hands be washed before eating?”
CANNIBAL STUDENT: “Who wants to eat dirty hands?”
Joke #18257
Q: Why did Captain Hook go to the thrift shop?
A: He wanted to find a second-hand bargain.
Quote #17122
“Someone smacked me with a ruler and cut my hand open, it is my intent to put a band-aid on now”
– davepoobond
Quote #16782
“my hands are craving your neck right now!”
– Mrs. Stickums
Quote #16772
“raise your hand if you have coupons!”
– Mrs. Stickums
Quote #16709
“When the big hands on two”
– Mrs. Stickums