Q: What’s the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
A: Anyone can roast beef.
Tag Archives: food
pickled feet
pickled feet – n. a food delicacy that even a pig wouldn’t eat
Joke #11153
Q: How is talking to someone with food stuck in his teeth like washing dishes?
A: You can guess what people had for lunch.
Gross-Out Top 5 Lists
Always…
1) Look both ways before crossing the street. (Road kill should always be small animals.)
2) Eat your cereal before it gets soggy. (Gag me with the spoon.)
3) Drink your milk before it gets hot. (Barf, anyone?)
4) Clean those crusty things out of your eyes before you try to walk around in the morning.
5) Give your teacher an apple; just check for worm holes and rotten parts.
–
Never…
1) Eat greasy food before going on a roller coaster. (Sometimes what goes down does come up.)
2) Pick your nose and park it on the bedpost. (Who wants to see that later?)
3) Have Doritos before going on anything resembling a date. (Breath with a bad attitude.)
4) Drink anything anybody hands you. (Lugey alert!)
5) Wet the bed if you’re on the top bunk.
carrot+ (carrot plus)
carrot+ – n. an ice cream flavor that is made by genetically altering carrots to taste like Oreo cookies, smashing and grinding it up into little pieces for the flavoring.
Joke #11069
Q: What happened to Garth from Wayne’s World when he had too much Hamburger Helper with horseradish?
A: He heavily hurled the Hamburger Helper with horseradish.
Joke #11068
Q: In Wayne’s World, what happened to Wayne when he had too much spaghetti with special spicy sauce?
A: He spontaneously spewed the spaghetti with special spicy sauce.
Joke #11050
Q: What happened to the kid who ate too much junk food?
A: He tossed his cookies.
Joke #11037
Q: What do you call a hamburger restaurant where kids pick their noses?
A: Booger King.
Joke #11036
Q: Why is toejam served on a toenail considered a delicacy in some countries?
A: Because it resembles a clam on the half-shell.
Joke #10984
Q: What do you have left after a pig eats a watermelon?
A: Pork rinds.
Joke #10982
Q: Why do burn victims hate hospital food?
A: It makes their skin crawl.
Joke #10824
Q: What’s the difference between an old pair of shoes and a school lunch?
A: In an emergency, you can always eat the shoes.
Joke #10822
Q: Why do vultures like the road kill on country roads?
A: They prefer home cooking.
Joke #10772
Q: What do you call a dish featuring meat from pigs and people?
A: Pork and beings.