Tag Archives: davepoobond

#74: Beetle -> davepoobond

This entry is part 2 of 2 in the series Looking For a Slave

During and after the RhyDin SIave Cage this IM happened:

Beetle: now Im looking for a slave

davepoobond: great

Beetle: can you help me

Beetle: I’ve never bought one

davepoobond: yeah, ldy looks like a fiesty one

Beetle: Ldys a slave owner

Beetle: I asked her

davepoobond: kill him

Beetle: who?

davepoobond: the slave owner

davepoobond: duhh

Beetle: Thats a female

davepoobond: so

Beetle: well why

davepoobond: fine, dont

Beetle: well help me you said A pixy was a slave

Beetle: Pixey

davepoobond: no! you want a slave, you get one yourself

Beetle: man How?

davepoobond: you…ask….if anybody wants to be your slave and be forceful about it!

davepoobond: dont ask me

Beetle: man Isn’t there like a Manager

Beetle: cause I’ll hire you

davepoobond: no…

Beetle: well say 10million dollars to find me a slave

davepoobond: hire me what

davepoobond: i dont need money

Beetle: to find me one

davepoobond: brb

Beetle: okay

Beetle: ok

davepoobond: well, when you say 10 million dollars, do u mean US dollars, sent to my front porch, or just 10 million dollars just cuz you can give it to me and get a slave for free

Beetle: (this isn’t IRL ok)

davepoobond: ok

Beetle: so I’ll pay you 10million dollars

Beetle: to find me a slave

davepoobond: how do i know you have the money

Beetle: ::pulls his wallet out pulls out 10million bucks::

Beetle: see

davepoobond: …..now, that amazes me that any one wallet can have 10 million dollars in it at one time

Beetle: Im RICH

Beetle: 10 mil is nothing to me

Beetle: Its pocket change

davepoobond: but……HOW did it fit in your wallet

Beetle: so. do ya

Beetle: I have a very BIG wallet

davepoobond: thats insane, only a homicidal maniac would have a wallet that size

Beetle: WHATS THE POINT

Beetle: ITS 10 MILLION BUCKS

Beetle: fine

Beetle: :;cancel the wallet part::

davepoobond: …….who made the wallet? i oughtta write them a letter for using so much leather

Beetle: ::pulls out 2 bags of money::

Beetle: see 5million in each bag

davepoobond: …….

davepoobond: why would u need 2?

davepoobond: if it was in coins, you’d need at least 10

Beetle: 10million in one bag is 2 much

davepoobond: and if it was in bills, you’d only need one

davepoobond: no

Beetle: its BILLS

Beetle: so I wanted 2

davepoobond: THEY FIT 10 MIL IN A BRIEFCASE

Beetle: I know that

Beetle: I gave 2 cause

Beetle: :;hands him one bag::

davepoobond: yeehaw!

davepoobond: now…..what to do with it…..

Beetle: You get the other when you have a slave

davepoobond: i know!

davepoobond: ::bonks beetle on the head with it::

Beetle: You have 5million BUCKS

Beetle: I DUNNO

davepoobond: hahah! how does it feel to be hit with 5 million bucks

Beetle: GO BUY A CAR

Beetle: not bad

davepoobond: no need for a car in RhyDin

davepoobond: a mouse gives me a ride everywhere

Beetle: now will you be my manager

Beetle: a MOUSE?

davepoobond: ….actually, its a grizzly bear

Beetle: okay

davepoobond: he gets mad when i call him a mouse

Beetle: NYWAY YOUR MY MANAGER OK

Beetle: Oh so his names mouse

Beetle: and hes a bear

davepoobond: no

Beetle: no to what

davepoobond: his name is Joey the socially active grizzly bear

Beetle: oh ok

Beetle: Now are you my Manager in other word my slave finder

davepoobond: ……why

davepoobond: i’m just a dwarf

Beetle: so what

Beetle: you seem like a manager type

davepoobond: why dont you pay yourself to be your manager in other words slave finder guy and find a slave for yourself?

Beetle: I don’t know HOW

davepoobond: then find out how!

Beetle: :;takes 5million back::

Beetle: fine

davepoobond: do u really think i know how?

Beetle: yes I do

davepoobond: well, i dont bucko

Beetle: Okay

davepoobond: that was worth 5 million dollars to waste your time

Beetle: ::hits him on the head with the 5mil::

davepoobond: ouch!

Beetle: hows that feel

davepoobond: i feel like a rich man

Beetle: ::puts 10mil back up::

Beetle: I have the money

davepoobond: ::eats his 10 million dollars::

davepoobond: my stomach does now

Beetle: Oh well

RhyDin SIave Cages

This entry is part 1 of 2 in the series Looking For a Slave

OnlineHost: *** You are in “Arts and Entertainment – RhyDin SIave Cages”. ***

Andero: ::starts to walk to the door::

davepoobond: WE! ARE! VR!

Kaz: ((LOL))

Tymber: ::nods:: her hand outstretched to Raver

Waterdog: sir trobles you to day

davepoobond: insert key thingys into your wrist!

davepoobond: ::jams key thingy into my wrist::

Waterdog: ::smiles::

davepoobond: ouch!

Raverjay: want to go to my house for awhile

davepoobond: ::turns it::

davepoobond: AAAAAAAAHhhh!

Kaz: ::looks to her:: Oh nothing much…

davepoobond: it hurts to be a VR trooper….

Kenichirou: ::He glanced at Raverjay…:: …Silence human… I would like a word with this woman.

Andero: ::walks out::

OnlineHost: Andero has left the room.

davepoobond: ::slides over to yuuki::

davepoobond: hey!

Raverjay: (( clicks ths button gnore on Kenichirou ))

Yuuki: ((::blinks:: VR….Trooper?…..I haven’t heard of that for years))

Kaz: ::his attention is ccaught by keni’s words:

davepoobond: ((i’m surprised none of you remember them))

Yuuki: ::watchit, she’s a bit pregnant::

Kenichirou: ::He casually tossed Tymber the katana:: …Catch..

davepoobond: i see you’re a bit pregnant!

Tymber: ::catches::

davepoobond: IS YOUR WATER GONNA BREAK SOOOOOOON?

davepoobond: I’M REALLY THIRST

davepoobond: Y

Kenichirou: ::He stepped back a foot and folded his arms acrossed his breast-plate:: …Let me see

Kenichirou: what you are capable of.

davepoobond: ((::sips some of my water juice::))

davepoobond: ok, i’m not thirsty anymore

Tymber: ::stares::

davepoobond: ::stares back::

Yuuki: um….Bond…..how old are you?

davepoobond: hm

davepoobond: last time i checked

davepoobond: i was

Kaz: ::he watches keni, and Tymber, intrigued::

Kenichirou: You will either show me your combative skill or waste none of my time any further.

davepoobond: 500 minus 496 plus 10

Kaz: ((EVeryone still there?))

Kenichirou: ::He tapped his left foot impatiently… it was obvious he wasn’t like the typical Rhydin

Kenichirou: male after a sex slave…::

Yuuki: 14…….ya act like it

davepoobond: ((i’m just waiting for a response))

davepoobond: heh, took you that long to do the math, eh?

davepoobond: mwahah!

Kaz: ((LOL))

Yuuki: ::would make a good sex slave in about 3 months::

Tymber: ::smiles and hands him his Katana:: I do not fight….i am a sexslave…

Raverjay: :: stares and laughs slightly trying to see what is going on ::

davepoobond: ::raises a brow::

Kenichirou: ::He grabbed the sword back from her harshly:: Then you are useless.

Raverjay: :: looks at the man calling him a mere mortal ::

davepoobond: geez, you’re in the weirdest places raist

Kaz: ((yup lol))

Kenichirou: ::He swiftly sheathed the katana back into its saya and turned away, glancing at the others

Kenichirou: around::

Kaz: ::leans on the cage smirking::

davepoobond: ok!

davepoobond: who wants to eat some of my poop

Kenichirou: ((*cough* Raverjay-mun, Kamui called him HUMAN, not mortal… and mortal/immortal doesn’t

Kenichirou: matter since most people don’t realize beign immortal just means you don’t age… you can die just

Kenichirou: as easily.))

davepoobond: well? any takers?!

davepoobond: ::fart::

davepoobond: they’re stirring up, nice and hot

Raverjay: (( thats nice it dont make a diffrence to me ))

davepoobond: i can smell it right now

davepoobond: oooooooohhhhhhweee!

Raverjay: (( kepep in ic please bye ))

Kenichirou: ::He glanced at Kaz:: <q> My my, such a cocky little visage you have…

OnlineHost: Luscanon has entered the room.

OnlineHost: Luscanon has left the room.

Tymber: ::she looks around::

OnlineHost: Ldy has entered the room.

Yuuki: ((I get the feeling Bond doesn’t have many friends….))

Kaz: ((LOL!))

Raverjay: :: looks at tymber again :: that was interesting

davepoobond: ((ha! what are you talking about))

OnlineHost: Beetle has entered the room.

Kenichirou: ::He pointed at Kaz…:: …Come here, boy.

Beetle: :;appears in::

davepoobond: ((true, i may scare a few people now and then))

Beetle: Hello whos in charge

Kaz: Oh… Me?

Beetle: of this place

Kenichirou: …indeed, you.

davepoobond: yeah! i’d like to know that

Ldy: ::she walked in slowly, her silver and gold wolf shaped eyes look around as she moved inward

davepoobond: too

Beetle: Whos in charge

Ldy: her firery red hair fell about her shoulders as she watched::

Kaz: ::he gets up and strides to him quietly::

Beetle: :;appears by Ldy::

Kenichirou: ::He swiftly grabbed Kaz by the neck, his thumb feeling the boy’s jawline::

Beetle: No females

davepoobond: ::looks over to ldy:: ………MOMMA!

Kenichirou: …Can you fight…?

Beetle: BOND

davepoobond: ::runs over to her and hugs her leg reallly tight::

Beetle: I remember you

davepoobond: ya do?

Beetle: davepoobond

Tymber: ::looks to Jay::

Beetle: from tifas bar

davepoobond: i dont remember you

Kaz: Yes.

Beetle: member

Ldy: ::raises a brow::

davepoobond: no, i dont member

Beetle: you explained a slave

Kaz: ::he remains calm and passive::

Beetle: oh well I want one

Ldy: get off me kid!

Beetle: Can I have one

Kenichirou: ::He grinned and whispered into the boy’s ear:: <q> …poor child… so innocent… yet

Kenichirou: already a slave at such a young age…

davepoobond: boohoo

davepoobond: rejected by my own momma

Raverjay: would you like to leave here now

Kenichirou: <q> …and humans enslaved you more than likely, didn’t they…?

Ldy: i am not your mom

Beetle: davepoobond

Kaz: ::his eyes widen:: …

davepoobond: now i’m gonna cry and wipe my booger all over your leg

OnlineHost: Jay Moon has entered the room.

Jay Moon: ::toddles up, lookin around with his greenish-blue eyes::

Ldy: ::picks up the kid and opens a cage door and tosses him inside locking it::

Raverjay: im tired of people :: looks at keni::

Ldy: thats for being anoying

Kenichirou: <q> …how would you like to pay those humans back for what they did… how would you

Kenichirou: like to see the fear in their eyes as you bleed them to death…?

Jay Moon: ::me?::

Ldy: (no))

Beetle: Ldy

Jay Moon: ((k))

Kaz: ::he looks down::

Beetle: are you a slave owner

Beetle: or a slave

OnlineHost: Waterdog has left the room.

Jay Moon: ::looks to ldy::

Kenichirou: ::He laughed darkly and straightened his posture::

Kenichirou: …I can give you that opportunity, boy.

Ldy: ::smiles at jay::;

Beetle: ldy:

Jay Moon: ::smiles up at her, extends his arm, wavin up at her::

Kaz: Is that so…?

Kenichirou: ::He licked his lips slowly:: <q> …I can train you. Perfect you. Turn you into a killer.

Ldy: ::waves back:::

davepoobond: ::gets out of the cage and slams a bucket of grapes on top of ldy’s head::

davepoobond: MWAHAH! THE BUCKET OF GRAPES STRIKES AGAIN!

Jay Moon: ::smiles::

Beetle: BAD LDY

Raverjay: :: looks into her eyes :: are you ok tymber

Kaz: ::he keeps looking down, not making direct eye contact::

Beetle: :;goes Chibi::

Beetle: SCUSE ME

Ldy: ((::throws an ignore dagger at davepoobond:::))

Beetle: I NEED A SLAVE

Kenichirou: <q> You can join my army… take your freedom back… purify and bathe this land in the

Kenichirou: blood of humans… the ones that ruined your short-lived life.

Tymber: ::Yeah….

Beetle: Ldy

Beetle: :;appears by her::

Kaz: I dont know…

Ldy: i dont have one you would want!

Ldy: ::looksing at him:::

Beetle: Are you a slave owner or trader

Tymber: ::her eyes narrow, as she raises her voice:: I’m a Human…

Ldy: owner

Beetle: Or are you a alsve

Beetle: oh ok

Xiniji Shaiko Temple

OnlineHost: *** You are in “Arts and Entertainment – Xiniji Shaiko Temple”. ***

Hotaru: ::kicks Dragiita in the face::

Dragiita: ::::block kick::

davepoobond: ::takes a bucket of grapes and slams it on top of darkangel’s head::

Kaz: (brb))

Dragiita: hey ::flips back::

davepoobond: ((ok))

davepoobond: mwaha!

Hotaru: ::collapses::

Dragiita: what are u guys doing

davepoobond: ::eats grapes::

DarkRaven: ::looks to Hotaru::

davepoobond: …..hmm?

Kaz: ((back))

Dragiita: its just a girl

davepoobond: well, i just picked a random person, and she was the lucky contestant

Dragiita: no need to get mindevil

Kaz: Shes not JUST a girl…

Kaz: ::scowls::

davepoobond: on

davepoobond: the

davepoobond: PRICE IS RIGHT

Dragiita: ::::raise brow::

davepoobond: ::a crowd of weirdos cheers::

davepoobond: yay!

davepoobond: that’s right! the price is right!

Kaz: ((LOLOLOL!!!))

Hotaru: your lucky to get off scot-free ::a strange light surrrounds her::

davepoobond: eh?

davepoobond: scott free?

davepoobond: i wonder who that is

Kaz: ::sighs relieved::

davepoobond: he must have a FREE life

Kaz: ((LLOL))|

davepoobond: AHAHAHA!

davepoobond: bob barker, you’re so funny!

Kaz: ((whoever he is I’m off of him now…))

Kaz: ((And not a moment too soon…))

Hotaru: ((put him on ignore then))

davepoobond: ((…….?))

Dragiita: ok

Kaz: ::limps to hotaru::

davepoobond: ………

davepoobond: poof!

Kaz: Are you ok?

Hotaru: ::Struggles to get up::

Kaz: That Jester defeated your dark side…

davepoobond: ::turns into a weird mexican man named Ricky Ricardo::

davepoobond: ahahah!

Kaz: ((LOL!))

davepoobond: bong bong bongo!

davepoobond: ya ya ya!

davepoobond: sing with me!

davepoobond: bong bong bongo!

Hotaru: huh?

davepoobond: bong bong bongo

OnlineHost: Dragiita has left the room.

davepoobond: bongo bongo bongo

davepoobond: olay@

davepoobond: !

davepoobond: ::tap dance solo::

Kaz: ((LOL))

Kaz: ((::dies:: x_x))

Kaz: ((XD))

Kaz: Ugh… I need a vacation..

Kaz: ::collapses blood spreding on the floor::

Kaz: And a band-aid..

Kaz: In fact I need the band aid more.

Kaz: 1. Band aid

Kaz: 2. Vacation

Kaz: ::is delirious from blood loss::

davepoobond: hey hey!

DarkRaven: ::looks to the person dying on the ground::

davepoobond: dont die! you need to fight in a tournament

OnlineHost: DarkRaven has left the room.

OnlineHost: Hotaru has left the room.

Kaz: I dunno why all them Nixons are dancin there but Ive had it up to HERE with his farmer.

Kaz: Ima gonna punt them all!

Kaz: :: suddenly gets up chases a group of pigeons::

Kaz: feild goal time!

Kaz: Field*

Kaz: ::trips and falls::

davepoobond: heh

davepoobond: we scared them off

Kaz: Aww they missed my nixon xcomment

davepoobond: heh

Annoying a Chat Room

davepoobond: ::picks up a piece of poop off the floor and puts it on the guy i was biting his hair on his head::

Raye: trust me..

Merlin: i also have another symbol on my head..::pushes his silver hair back revieling a black moon

PrinceMercury: o.o

nacto: :::lunges at First:::

Merlin: than what does this mean?

davepoobond: yeah, thats a pretty nice symbol

MGRex: No one can steal my heart, Ami already did

davepoobond: keekee

Raye: I’ve goten my heart snatched alot lately..

Merlin: ::is ignoring First::

Mercury: ::smiles::

Merlin: ??

davepoobond: mwahaha

Raye: its a black moon symbol..

Merlin: princess what is this symbol mean than?

davepoobond: ::teleports to the back of nacto::

davepoobond: hey, there mr. you trying to lunge at me?

Raye: meaning…your evil in pyhical..but not in emotions or mind

Merlin: ???

PrinceMercury: Your from Nemisis Tenchu

Merlin: what!?

nacto: :::puts sword through chest:::

PrinceMercury: A planet

Raye: trust me tenchu..

Merlin: ::is now completely confused::

davepoobond: ouch, that must hurt

davepoobond: i dont know why you put a sword through your own chest

Xenawar: I`m gone ::walks out with hands beside::

OnlineHost: Xenawar has left the room.

Raye: its meaning you were born evil..

MGRex: I love Ami, I love Ami, I love Ami, I love Ami

OnlineHost: Skitch has entered the room.

Merlin: ….

Mercury: ::blushes::

OnlineHost: Skitch has left the room.

nacto: it makes the hunger die down lol

davepoobond: right

Merlin: prince merlin also has this symbol…

Kaz: ((ami is sooooo hot *_*))

davepoobond: everybody does that now a days, dont they?

Merlin: ((…))

nacto: screwed up on the typing

nacto: (sorrry)

davepoobond: just stick their sword into their chest

davepoobond: “cuz they cant eat”

OnlineHost: nacto has left the room.

PrinceMercury: ((Your soooo right Kaz))

davepoobond: mwaha

Merlin: ::shakes his head::

davepoobond: made him leave

Merlin: ((….))

davepoobond: ::dances around the room::

Raye: davepoobond…leave him alone would ya?!

Kaz: (( *_* ))

davepoobond: nyah nyah nyah

davepoobond: why?

davepoobond: he’s gone?

davepoobond: yes

davepoobond: he is

Merlin: so princess what does this make me?

OnlineHost: IceEmpress has left the room.

Raye: evil…but that doesn’t mean you have to be..

Merlin: …

davepoobond: thats me in the corner!

davepoobond: thats me in the spotlight!

davepoobond: losing my religion

Merlin: i am evil?

davepoobond: trying to keep out

davepoobond: and i dont know if i can do it

davepoobond: oh no, i said toooo much!

davepoobond: ::grabs raye by the shirt collar::

davepoobond: i thought that i heard you laughing!

PrinceMercury: You don’t have to be evil, but you could if you wanted to.

Merlin: but how can i be evil i do nothing wrong…

davepoobond: I THOUGHT THAT I HEARD YOU SING!

Raye: ah!

davepoobond: EVERY WHISPER

davepoobond: EVERY WAKING HOUR

Merlin: doesnt everyone have that posablity?

davepoobond: I’M CHOOSING MY CONFESSIONS

davepoobond: ::jumps on raye’s head::

PrinceMercury: Not like you do.

Raye: let me be davepoobond!

davepoobond: like a wildabeast in honey!

davepoobond: i thought i heard you laughing!

Merlin: davepoobond please leave the princess alone

davepoobond: i thought i heard you gripe!

Raye: I wasn’t!

davepoobond: brought me to my knees

Raye: ack! go away!

davepoobond: now i said

davepoobond: i said too much!

davepoobond: I THOUGHT THAT I HEARD YOU LAUGHING

Merlin: ::grabs First::

davepoobond: ::jumps off raye::

davepoobond: i think i got a song tooo try!?

Merlin: ::lets go::

Kaz: ::agrees with First::

Merlin: doc what has happened to you?

Raye: I’m not understanding what your saying to me davepoobond

Kaz: WHats happened to me?

Kaz: HAH

davepoobond: i thought i heard you laughing!

davepoobond: ::pants merlin::

davepoobond: that was just a dream

davepoobond: just a dream!

Kaz: The one you know as raislin is gone…

davepoobond: ::what is your name then

davepoobond: ::

Merlin: wha???

Kaz: Now its EMERYK DA PIMP

Merlin: what do you mean he is gone?

PrinceMercury: ::laughs::

Kaz: ::breakdances::

Merlin: what have you done with him?

Raye: ::holds chest, panting, runs off::

Mercury: ::looks around::

davepoobond: heh

Kaz: hes gone bye bye

Kaz: ^_^

PrinceMercury: ::stops laughing:: Ahem…sorry

Kaz: U_U

Kaz: <_<

Merlin: whereis he?

Kaz: >_>

Raye: ::chest pain in heart is hurting, runing faster::

Merlin: ::runs after raye::

davepoobond: poOOp!

Mercury: ::runs after Raye::

Mercury: Raye?!

Kaz: POooPi

Merlin: ::his speed suddenly ecells hers n he runs past her::

Merlin: ack!

MGRex: ::Runs after Raye::

Raye: ::falls to her knees:: I’m…fine..

OnlineHost: Vampiro has entered the room.

Merlin: ::stops infront of her::

Mercury: ::stops::

MGRex: Raye, are you ok?

Merlin: you are not princess…

PrinceMercury: ::Follows Ami::

Mercury: No you’re not Raye i know it

Mercury: ::kneels beside her::

davepoobond: mwah!

Vampiro: ::he sits inside the dark shadows apearing slowly staying unseen::

Merlin: hmm…tell me whats wrong…

davepoobond: she must have found that little secret i left in her hair

Kaz: Ami you so hot!

Raye: my heart crystal has always had this crak in it…

Kaz: as something REALLY REALLY hot!

OnlineHost: Vampiro has left the room.

Merlin: …

davepoobond: why didnt u glue it together then?!

Merlin: stand back im gonna try something…’

UPDATE 08-04-07

Pick of August 4, 2007

davepoobond:  Its been recently unveiled to me that the web site is not, as they say, as popular as some of the bigger/more popular web sites out there.  Interesting hypothesis I said to myself.  Then I asked myself, “ARE there other humor sites out there?”  The simple answer to that, in my expert opinion, is no.  Thus, I have proven the hypothesis false.

August 04, 2007

Dictionary – 5000 words. SUBMIT A WORD

Stupid IMsdavepoobond IM 53, gUnsNRoses IM 2, davepoobond IM 54, Jasonishigh IM, davepoobond IM 55, Holmes IM 22, davepoobond IM 56, Phoenix IM 10, davepoobond IM 57, Phoenix IM 11, davepoobond IM 58, Evil Hell Cow IM 19, davepoobond IM 59, FutureTrunkxx IM, davepoobond IM 60, Solidussnake IM, davepoobond IM 61, Evil Hell Cow IM 20

#6070: stimpyismyname -> davepoobond

stimpyismyname: aa

davepoobond: bb

stimpyismyname: cc

davepoobond: dd

stimpyismyname: ee

davepoobond: ff

stimpyismyname: gg

davepoobond: hh

stimpyismyname: ii

davepoobond: jj

stimpyismyname: kk

davepoobond: ll

stimpyismyname: mm

davepoobond: nn

stimpyismyname: oo

davepoobond: pp

stimpyismyname: qq

davepoobond: rr

stimpyismyname: ss

davepoobond: tt

stimpyismyname: uu

davepoobond: vv

stimpyismyname: ww

davepoobond: xx

stimpyismyname: yy

davepoobond: zz

stimpyismyname: hooray

davepoobond: aa

stimpyismyname: thats a good dumb im

davepoobond: yeah it is

#6065: davepoobond -> stimpyismyname

davepoobond: did u finish the castlevania game

stimpyismyname: no

davepoobond: are you going to or are you still working on it

stimpyismyname: i sorta gave up on it

davepoobond: just put it up as v.1.0

stimpyismyname: no

davepoobond: y not

stimpyismyname: its not a game

davepoobond: so

stimpyismyname: not gonnan

davepoobond: fine, ass

stimpyismyname: ur the ass

stimpyismyname: DUMass

stimpyismyname: haha

stimpyismyname: dumb

davepoobond: k