“That’s a very, very nice walkie talkie you have there”
– Chill Factor (1999)
also known as “That movie with Cuba Gooding Jr. being an ice cream truck delivery guy”
Tag Archives: ice cream
Joke #13282
A kid runs into his house and says to his mother, “Can I have a quarter for a man who’s outside crying?”
The mother asks, “What is he crying?”
The youngster answers, “‘Ice cream, 25 cents!'”
Joke #12469
The price of milk is so high, it’s almost cheaper to buy ice cream and melt it down.
Joke #12164
CUSTOMER: “Waiter, what is this fly doing in my ice cream?”
WAITER: “Maybe he likes winter sports.”
Joke #11612
A space creature walked into a drugstore and ordered a sundae that cost fifty cents. He put down a ten dollar bill to pay for it. The clerk thought, “What does a space creature know about money?” So he handed him back a single dollar in change.
As he did, he said, “You know, we don’t get many space creatures in here.”
“No wonder,” answered the creature, “at nine dollars a sundae!”
Joke #11551
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Ice cream.
Ice cream who?
Ice cream ’cause I’m a cheerleader.
carrot+ (carrot plus)
carrot+ – n. an ice cream flavor that is made by genetically altering carrots to taste like Oreo cookies, smashing and grinding it up into little pieces for the flavoring.
halejew
halejew – adj. to like ice cream, scented candles, and tennis. You also believe your parents love you and you value honesty and truth.
chalabi
chalabi – n. tar-flavored ice cream
choump
choump – n. an ice cream and espresso discount
Joke #9179
An 80 year old couple were having problems remembering things, so they decided to go to their doctor to get checked out to make sure nothing was wrong with them.
When they arrived at the doctors, they explained to the doctor about the problems they were having with their memory. After checking the couple out, the doctor told them that they were physically okay but might want to start writing things down and make notes to help them remember things. The couple thanked the doctor and left.
Later that night while watching TV, the man got up from his chair and his wife asked, “Where are you going?”
He replied, “To the kitchen.”
She asked, “Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?”
He replied, “Sure.”
She then asked him, “Don’t you think you should write it down so you can remember it?”
He said, “No, I can remember that.”
She then said, “Well I would also like some strawberries on top. You had better write that down because I know you’ll forget that.”
He said, “I can remember that, you want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries.” She replied, “Well I also would like whipped cream on top. I know you will forget that so you better write it down.”
With irritation in his voice, he said, “I don’t need to write that down! I can remember that.” He then fumes into the kitchen.
After about 20 minutes he returned from the kitchen and handed her a plate of bacon and eggs. She stared at the plate for a moment and said angrily:
“I TOLD you to write it down! You forgot my toast!”
Church Bulletins
– Our next song is “Angels We Have Heard Get High”.
– Don’t let worry kill you–let the church help.
– Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community.
– For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
– Weight Watchers will meet a 7 p.m. at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.
– Jean will be leading a weight-management series Wednesday nights. She’s used the program herself and has been growing like crazy!
– The rosebud on the altar this morning is to announce the birth of David Alan Belzer, the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Julius Belzer.
– This afternoon there will be a meeting in the South and North ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.
– Tuesday at 4:00 p.m. there will be an ice cream social. All ladies giving milk will please come early.
– This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and lay an egg on the altar.
– The service will close with Little Drops of Water. One of the ladies will start quietly and the rest of the congregation will join in.
– Next Sunday a special collection will be taken to defray the cost of the new carpet. All those wishing to do something on the carpet should come forward and do so.
– The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind. They can be seen in the church basement Saturday.
– Thursday night–Potluck supper. Prayer and medication to follow.
– Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
– The senior choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir.
– At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be “What is Hell?” Come early and listen to our choir practice.
– During the absence of our pastor, we enjoyed the rare privilege of hearing a good sermon when A. B. Doe supplied our pulpit.
– The Rev. Adams spoke briefly, much to the delight of his audience.
– The church is glad to have with us today as our guest minister the Rev. Shirley Green, who has Mrs. Green with him. After the service we request that all remain in the sanctuary for the Hanging of the Greens.
– The eighth graders will be presenting Shakespeare’s Hamlet” in the church basement on Friday at 7 p.m. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.
– The 1991 Spring Council Retreat will be hell May 10 and 11.
– Pastor is on vacation. Massages can be given to church secretary.
– Please join us as we show our support for Amy and Alan in preparing for the girth of their first child.
– Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
udresbet
udresbet – v. to push someone with an ice cream into a lake
junkinboy
junkinboy – n. Healthy choice ice cream (bad)
fubstud
fubstud – n. a burger with ice cream on top