I read in the newspaper about a French cat burglar who’s doing great. So far, he’s gotten away with twenty-five cats.
Tag Archives: France
Joke #11485
Ken: I’m glad I wasn’t born in France.
Debby: Why?
Ken: Because I can’t speak French!
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Debby: I’m glad I wasn’t born in Spain.
Ken: Why? Because you don’t speak Spanish?
Debby: That’s right! How’d you guess?
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Ken: I’m glad I wasn’t born in Urehatt.
Debby: Urehatt? Where’s Urehatt?
Ken: It’s on my head! Ha ha! Gotcha that time!
Joke #11274
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Venice.
Venice who?
Venice your boyfriend coming over?
Joke #11262
Q: How do you say chocolate in French?
A: Chocolate in French.
Joke #11119
Q: What did the suicidal Frenchman say when St. Peter asked how he died?
A: “Eifel (off the) Tower”
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Note: I actually made this one.
Joke #10462
Q: What is in the middle of nowhere?
A: H.
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Another version of this joke:
Q: What is in the middle of Paris?
A: The letter R.
konyon
konyon – n. a big French guy with dollar signs in his eyes and a pink diagonal striped shirt
Joke #9254: Genesister Act
A Brit, a Frenchman and a Russian are viewing a painting of Adam and Eve frolicking in the Garden of Eden.
“Look at their reserve, their calm,” muses the Brit. “They must be British.”
“Nonsense,” the Frenchman disagrees. “They’re naked, and so beautiful. Clearly, they are French.”
“No clothes, no shelter,” the Russian points out, “they have only an apple to eat, and they’re being told this is paradise. Clearly, they are Russian.”
Joke #9082
Q: Why did the tunnel in Paris get so red?
A: Because they got Di all over it.
Joke #8963
Q: Why did the French Police confiscate Paparazzi pictures taken at the crash scene of Princess Diana?
A: They were too cheap to buy a copy of the Enquirer for themselves.
Joke #8961
Q: What was Princess Diana’s final hairstyle?
A: A French twist.
The G8 Summit Meeting: The Truth Behind the Closed Doors
In case you forogt, this is the “Group of 8” Meetings that happened a while ago.
———————————–
First, lets talk about how much George W. Bush sucks at being president. My pinky could run the U.S. better than that prick! At least my pinky never touched cocaine………or so I think….. and HE’S GONNA PUT US INTO WW3 because of his fuckin ballistic missile shit! We should launch HIM into the air and blow HIM up like a ballistic missile! That’s the only goodness we’d get out of that system! Here’s a little reenactment of Bush. Sr. talking to his son about the Ballistic Missiles:
Bush, Sr.: “Bush, Jr. WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!”
Bush, Jr.: “I’m….getting ready for Desert Storm!”
Bush, Sr.: “You stupid idiot!!!! ::smacks him in the balls::”
Bush, Jr.: “Not my sack daddy, please stop smacking them around”
Bush, Sr.: “I TOLD you that i won that war a long time ago! Haven’t you seen that fancy pancy movie Three Kings?”
Bush, Jr.: “Ballistic missiles are fun to watch blow up Russia with! even though i had gay sex with the leader of Russia- ooooopss!”
Mrs. Bush, Jr.: “George! how DARE you! and without ME! I told you to not do anything sexual with any of the foreign leaders unless i was with you!”
Anyway. onto the G8 Summit…These are random things that could have happened during the meetings….
(Bush, Jr. plays with 2 missiles, making them fly in the air, and then have them crash into each other, throwing the pieces at the members of the G8 Summit committee)
Bush, Jr.: “…and so ends my explanation on the Ballistic Missiles”
(end)
Bush, Jr.: ::nudges the President of France next to him:: hey, sugar….wanna come back to my place?
President of France: ::bites Bush’s shoulder::
Bush, Jr.: AHHH! SON OF A BITCHHH
(end)
::Leader of Japan is talking about how Pokémon is good for the heart and soul, when….
A WHOLE GROUP OF MALE WHORES COME IN!!::
Bush, Jr.: ah! they’re finally here!
(end)
Bush, Jr.: AUHH! I’M A STUPID FACE POO MOM
(end)
Joke #7839
Q: What is a parasite?
A: Something you see in Paris.
pearé
pearé – n. a bernar with a French accent <see bernar>
opeorobn
opeorobn – n. a humid Mexican restaurant in France