How to Avoid Long Phone Calls by Xavier Breath
Can You Dial Direct? by Fred I. Kant
Is This Phone Call Over? by Midas Wellby
Calling the Barnyard by Tobias A. Pigg
Midnight Phone Calls by Eliza Wake Now
How to Avoid Long Phone Calls by Xavier Breath
Can You Dial Direct? by Fred I. Kant
Is This Phone Call Over? by Midas Wellby
Calling the Barnyard by Tobias A. Pigg
Midnight Phone Calls by Eliza Wake Now
Two space creatures attacked Earth and were in the process of devouring Hollywood.
They found a storage vault filled with movie film and began chomping away on a reel of film, each at a different end, working toward each other.
When they met at the middle, the first space creature said, “How’d you like it?”
“Not bad,” said the other. “But I liked the book better.”
Strike Three – by U.R. Out
Last-Inning Cliffhangers – by D. Bases, R. Loaded
Last-Second Touchdown – by Justin Time
Interception – by E. Bluitt
The Referee Is Always Right – by R.U. Nuts
Sports Medicine – by Frank N. Stein
The Washington Redskins – by T.P. Dweller
Great Basketball Plays – by Jim Shoes
Improve Your Foul Shooting – by Mr. Completely
Basketball Bloopers – by Dub L. Dribble
Calisthenics – by Stan Dupp and Neil Down
Skateboard Hotdogging – by Frank Furter
Ice Hockey for Beginners – by I.M. Freezin
Hockey Plays – by I.C. Tose
Bowling Strikes – by M.T. Lane
Boxing Knockouts – by Seymour Stars
Q: What book tells the tale of an astronomer with a hernia?
A: The Andromeda Strain.
Q: What book concerns a body snatcher chasing a girl through a grain field?
A: Catch Her in the Rye.
Q: What’s the difference between a book and a Mexican?
A: A book has papers.
Q: Where do books sleep?
A: Under their covers.
pagueane – v. to wear a book on your head
So, there was some stupid lady customer at work today.
She got a package of books that was 124.90 or somethin, and said that it was supposed to be like 90 something. So she brought down the book she bought along with another package that encased similar books (but not the exact same books) that was "in the same stack."
She has already bought the more expensive package and wanted a price adjustment to make the more expensive one into the lower-priced one.
I could tell right away when I looked at both of the packages, I told her, "these are different books."
She wouldn’t have it. She was stubborn in that she should still get a price adjustment, since the shelf tag said that the book she bought was supposed to be lower than what she paid.
To make matters worse, one of the textbook reps said it was okay to do the price adjustment. They probably didn’t notice that there were different books in the packages.
It just so happened that the book manager was there, so she asked what was happening, just as I was about to call her. After explaining the situation again, the customer went off on the manager saying "well, they said I could do it upstairs!" to which the book manager said "I don’t know why they did that, since *I* am the manager."
To explain the situation more plainly, the customer wanted to buy a completely different package of books priced at its own price for a completely different package of books priced lower than the one she bought, seemingly regardless of which package she actually needed.
Eventually the customer accused us of price fraud because we charged her more than the "advertised price" and wouldn’t adjust the price, saying "OH OK SO ITS MY FAULT THAT THEY PLACED BOOKS IN THE WRONG STACK."
She eventually stormed off after accusing us after accusing us of price fraud like 3 times, but wouldn’t even go with the book manager to look at the prices for the books. The shelf tags say right on them which ISBN is at which price, as well.
Not to mention it was painfully obvious that the included books were different from each other, she obviously didn’t even know which one she actually needed since she thought both packages were the same.
funbook – n. a book that gives the false intention that it is actually fun, but its really not
noptu – n. a book with great offers and unbelievable deals
lulr – n. a designated reader
euam – n. an overdue book overdue for 15 years
smuppu – n. a really really really overdue book
pmnp – n. a book so overdue its dusty