Q: If Miss Issippi brought a New Jersey for Miss Ouri, what would Della Wear?
A: I don’t know, but Alaska (I’ll ask her).
Tag Archives: Alaska
Joke #18702
While standing watch in the Coast Guard station in Juneau, Alaska, I got a call from the Navy in the nearby city of Adak. They had lost contact with one of their planes and needed the Coast Guard to send an aircraft to find it.
I asked the man where the Navy aircraft had last been spotted so we would know where to search.
“I can’t tell you,” the Navy man said. “That’s classified.”
Joke #18701
Vacationing in Alaska, I couldn’t help but notice all the warnings about bears posted in campgrounds, visitors centers and rest areas advising people not to feed the bears, how to avoid bears, what to do if a bear sees you, what to do if a bear attacks, and so on.
My favorite, however, was a hand-lettered sign on the door of a small gas station in a remote area. It said: “Warning! If you are being chased by a bear, don’t come in here!”
Joke #17888
Q: How do Eskimos like to travel to Alaska?
A: On icicles built for two.
Beans and franks served for lunch
Loading ...Joke #13287
Did you hear about the Eskimo who struck oil in Alaska? The first thing he did was rush out and buy his wife a cloth coat.
Joke #9263: Bridge Over the River Quiet
JoAnn was a busy housewife with a demanding husband, six children and a large house. The only relief JoAnn got from her chores was the twice-a-week bridge game she shared with a dozen other women. The only flaw in the bridge club relationship was that JoAnn loved to tell off-color stories and the girls didn’t want to hear them.
To teach JoAnn a lesson, the other women decided that the next time she told an off-color story, they’d just get up, walk out, and meet at another home but without her.
Sure enough, at the next bridge club meeting, JoAnn started, “You know, girls, there’s a rumor going around that a busload of prostitutes will be leaving in the morning for that big gold find up in Alaska, and they say . . . ” Just then, the women all stood up and started for the door.
JoAnn was disconcerted, but only for a moment. Then she understood what was going on and said, “Hey! Girls! Hold on, hold on! There’s plenty of time because the bus doesn’t leave until morning!”
Oddly Named Towns
Here are some oddly named towns:
– Toad Suck, Arkansas
– Hot Coffee, Mississippi
– Spread Eagle, Wisconsin
– Frankenstein, Missouri
– Chicken, Alaska
– Fifty-Six, Arizona
– Knockemstiff, Ohio
– Rabbit Hash, Kentucky
– Happy Jack, Arizona
– Truth or Consequences, New Mexico
If you have one, feel free to leave a comment.
Joke #8854
Q: What do you get when you send a cow to Alaska?
A: Cold cream.
Eskimo Kiss
Eskimo Kiss – n. a kiss that isn’t really a kiss, just 2 people rubbing noses together. Eskimos kiss this way because its so cold where they live that they can’t kiss with their mouths or else they’d die. This is also why Eskimos have red noses, because they get very irritated after they have sex without taking their clothes off, and all they can do is use their noses to Eskimo kiss. Its sad.
Alaskan Malimooch
Alaskan Malimooch – n. a dog-like creature that lives in Alaska, but is not a dog…