GAL (to office boy carrying a large stack of paper): “What’s all that, Charlie?”
CHARLIE: “These are memos from the boss telling us to cut down on using too much paper!”
Category Archives: Jokes
The whole Joke archive. Tons of jokes!
Joke #12893
PERSONNEL DIRECTOR: “I want you to know, Mr. Vummer, for this job we want someone who is responsible.”
MR. VUMMER: “That’s me. On my last job, whenever something went wrong, they said I was responsible.”
Joke #12892
FIRST WORKER: “You mean to say you lost your last job because the weather didn’t agree with you? What type of work did you do?”
SECOND WORKER: “I was a TV weather forecaster.”
Joke #12891
“What kind of work do you do?”
“My boss says it’s sloppy.”
Joke #12890
Gal at desk of fellow worker: “I’m taking up a collection to buy a larger collection box!”
Joke #12889
Overheard in a large office: “I have to ask for a raise. My take-home pay doesn’t even make it halfway home now!”
Joke #12888
CLERK #1: “Do you file your nails?”
CLERK #2: “No, I just throw them away!”
Joke #12887
My last girlfriend was so skinny, she could use a billiard cue case as a sleeping bag.
Joke #12886
If people always laugh at you when you’re a kid, it means one of two things. Either you’re going to grow up to be a comedian or you’re very funny-looking.
Joke #12885
Did you hear the one about the dumb politician who declined to run for Congress because he wasn’t into jogging?
Joke #12884
When it comes to people’s looks, beauty is only skin deep, but ugliness goes all the way to the bone.
Joke #12883
A gal looked her blind date up and down and said, “I’d like you better if you were tall, dark and handsome.”
The blind date looked her up and down and replied, “If I were tall, dark and handsome, I wouldn’t be out with you!”
Joke #12882
MILLIONAIRE: “Son, to make it in business you’ve got to live by two principles, honesty and wisdom.”
SON: “What do you mean by that, Dad?”
MILLIONAIRE: “Be honest in business. If you promise to do something, keep your word even if you have to go bankrupt to do it.”
SON: “And what about wisdom?”
MILLIONAIRE: “That’s simple to explain, son. Never make any promises.”
Joke #12881
EXPLAIN THIS: A man who takes money out of a man’s pocket without permission is a pickpocket. A woman who takes money out of a man’s pockets without permission is a wife.
Joke #12880
The minister looked at his congregation and said, “Brothers and sisters, today my sermon will be about liars. I refer to Matthew, chapter thirty, verse five. How many of you are familiar with it?”
As the minister looked around, half of the people before him raised their hands. “You are the people I want to address my sermon to,” announced the minister. “There is no Matthew, chapter thirty, verse five.”