OVERHEARD: “My wife doesn’t like to play with fire. That’s why we haven’t had a hot meal in our house for months.”
Category Archives: (C) Misogyny Jokes
Joke #13150
MALE GUEST: “Where is your wife?”
HUSBAND: “She’s in the kitchen fixing dinner. But in my opinion, it’s beyond repair.”
Joke #13149
I have the only wife in the world who has to pay her beautician combat pay.
Joke #13146
I think my wife is trying to tell me something. Last night she tied my tie for me… in a hangman’s noose!
Joke #13144
My wife never cleans up our house. When company comes, she just puts drop cloths all over the mess and tells everyone we’re painting.
Joke #13143
My wife drove cross country in our car last summer and hit every small town from New York to Los Angeles. The accidents cost me a fortune.
Joke #13142
Did you hear about the man who had four teenaged daughters? He called the phone company to complain about an obscene phone bill.
Joke #13139
MR. WHITE: “My wife is an angel!”
MR. BLACK: “Gosh! You are lucky. Mine is still living.”
Joke #13138
He’s so strong, he can life one hundred pounds with one hand. He has to be that strong. One of his wife’s dumplings weighs that much.
Joke #13137
My wife makes the only meat loaf in town that has to be cut with a hack saw.
Joke #13136
I’m not fussy. I’ll eat anything my wife puts on the table, as long as she didn’t cook it.
Joke #13135
My wife claims that her credit cards give her E.S.P. – Extra Spending Power.
Joke #13132
My mother-in-law is a real drip. You can hear her, but you can’t turn her off.
Joke #13131
There’s only one thing about my mother-in-law that I don’t like. She’s still breathing!
Joke #13130
The other day a wife said to her husband, “We’ve been married ten years and it’s been five years since you put your arms around me and gave me a hug.”
Looking her right in the eye, the man replied, “Don’t blame me. Blame your eating habits! It’s been five years since I could get my arms around you!”