Q: Where does pasta go to lose weight?

A: Spa-ghettis.

Tags: fat, pasta, spaghetti

Q: What would you get if you crossed linguine with a boa constrictor?

A: Spaghetti that winds itself.

Tags: snake, spaghetti

Q: How do you learn to eat spaghetti?

A: By using your noodle!

Tags: brain, pasta, spaghetti

The following is a menu offered at the Unfriendly Restaurhant and Coffin Shop Moan-U.

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A die-ning delight that will lift your spirits!

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SAND-WITCHES

Boo-loney

Boo-gels and Scream Cheese

Hallow-weenies

Liver-worst

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BOO-VERAGES

Milk Shaaaakes

Ice Scream Floats

Orange Crrrush

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HEX-TRAS

Clammy on the Half Shell

Chilllled Tomb-ato Juice

Deviled Eggs

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SOUPS AND SALADS

L-eeek! Soup

Cream of Asparaghost

Arti-Choke Hearts

Lettuce Alone Salad

Marinated Brussel Shouts

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SIGHED DISHES

Baked Beings

Cre-mated Spinach

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DESS-HURTS

Creep Suzettes

Banana Scream Pie

Sheet Cake

Key Slime Pie

Hot Sludge Shun-dae

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TODAY’S SPE-CHILLS

Spook-ghetti

Souther Fright Chicken

Ghoul-lash

Turkey with Grave-y

Pasta-way

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Breakfast Served from Midnight to 3 A.M. Daily

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CEREALS

Ghost Toasties with Evaporated Milk

Shrouded Wheat

Scream of Wheat

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EGGS

Terri-fried Eggs — Over Easy

Scream-bled Eggs

Three-moan-it Soft-booled Eggs

Stormy-side-up Eggs

Eggs Boonidict

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Cust-tomb-ers: We accept Die-ners Club, Monster Card, and American Hex-press Credit Cards

Tags: artichoke, asparagus, bagel, banana, beans, bologna, cake, cereal, cheese, chicken, clam, customer, dessert, devil, dish, egg, food, fudge, grave, gravy, Halloween, heart, hot dog, ice cream, juice, lettuce, lime, liver, milkshake, orange, pasta, pie, salad, sandwich, soup, spaghetti, spinach, tomato, turkey, wheat

Tagged People: American Express, MasterCard

Q: What do you get if you cross a telephone with an Italian dinner?

A: Spaghetti and meat bells!

Tags: bell, dinner, Italy, meat, spaghetti