Hokemon Theme Song

Parody of Pokemon Theme Song.

Fun Fact: The “Hokemon” are a group of fucked up animals that I made to parody Pokemon.  They can be found on SquackleWiki.

Today is the day, to be blown away

Like no one ever had…

I will get them on my balls, and be their masters till they die…

The Hokemon have to understand, the power that I put inside them…

Hokemon…!  Gotta fuck ’em all!!

It’s you and me Hokemon…

I know it’s our destiny!

Hokemon…Oh…you’re my best weapon,

in a battle we must wiiiiiin…

Hokemon…!  Gotta fuck ’em all!!

A fart so true — our courage will jerk me off!

You teach me and I’ll give you a gun!

Hokemon!

Gotta Fuck ‘Em All!

Gotta get ‘Em All!

HO-GAY-MONNNNNNNNN!

 

Ghetto Dreidel Song

Parody of the actual Dreidel song.


Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel
I made it outta wood

Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel
I played it in the ‘hood

Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel
I made it outta glass

Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel
I’m gonna kick yo……..

Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel
I made it outta dough

Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel
I wanna pimp a ho!

Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel
I made it with my stash

Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel
Yo mama is white trash!

Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel
I make it while I sing

Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel
I got the madd bling bling!

Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel
I don’t got yo present

Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel
From projects, represent!

 

Oops I Bit It Again

Parody of Britney Spears – Oops I Did It Again

Some people just blow..

Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

I think I bit it again..
I gave you relief, my braces are bent-

Oh babay-

It might seem like a crush-
But it doesn’t mean,
That I’m tearing up… (no tears no)
‘Cause to remove my dentures-
Would be so frightful to see…

Oops I bit it again
I grated your parts,
Then flossed all the same..
Oh babay, babay
Oops, you think that I love
This hint of a shove–
I’m not that into it.

You need to wobble like this-
And screaming I say:
“I wish this here nose,
Didn’t look like this..”
I try watching your ways..
Can’t you see that I drool
Endlessly for days..
But to lose my dentures,
That’s just too frightful to see..
Babay-

Oops I bit it again
I grated your parts,
Then flossed all the same..
Oh babay, babay
Oops,you think that I love
This hint of a shove–
I’m not that into it.

“On all fours!”

“Spitney,
Before you go,
There’s something I want you to have..”
“Oh, a noodle toy!! But I’m late for dinner..Isn’t this?”
“Yeah,with extra fizz..”
“But I thought that ‘Old Faithful’ stopped with
No lotion or gin”
“Well baby, I went down &,popped it for you..”
“Oh you shouldn’t have..”

Oh babay
Oops I bit it again
I grated your parts,
Then flossed all the same..
Oh baby, baby
Oops, you think that I love
This hint of a shove–
I’m not that into it.

Oops I bit it again
I grated your parts,
Then flossed all the same
Oh baby, baby
Oops, you think that I love
This hint of a shove–
I’m not that into it.

 

You Give Stink a Bad Name

Parody of Bon Jovi – You Give Love a Bad Name

C’mon, be honest…it stinks, doesn’t it?

Angel hair pasta is what I smell
I promised you noodles but just gave you shells..
Grains of corn and Cream Of Wheat
Are racking your body and trying to break free..

Oh..
You’re a loaded gun..
Oh..
There’s nowhere to run,
Gas-X can’t save you-
The damage is done..

I smell a fart, and you’re to blame
You give stink a bad name… (damn shame)
You eat Pop Tarts
And then you aim my way
You give stink a bad name… (bad name)

I’m turning pink..

Oh..

Pepto-Bismol on your lips
Beanos fall from your fingertips..
Boston cream & apple pie,
Your very first rip
Blew a whole through your thigh..

Oh..
Youre a loaded gun..
Oh..
Theres nowhere to run-
Maalox can’t save you
The damage is done..

I smell a fart,and you’re to blame hurlin’
You give stink a bad name.. (damn shame)
You eat pop tarts
And then you aim my way
You give stink a bad name… (bad name)

Oh you give stink….

A bad name.

 

The Clutch In My Van

Parody of Britney Spears – Touch Of My Hand

She learned to drive at an early age….

I’m not ashamed
To use the high beam,
I find myself parking
When the light is green…

When my tires are blown
I practice my show,
And ride my clutch
With the curtains closed…

And I know my poor brain ain’t right…
When I’m standing by your side…
I’m thinking about
My van all the time..
Motor oil is on my mind.
And where & how it will apply
I love my shelves
Covered in sheep skin
I can’t control this van I’m in…

Cause I’ve just discovered,
My van’s taking over…
I’ll have to hide it from my mother-
The more I come
To understand
The clutch in my van…
And where it’s at
In between my seat
Lately Ive been noticing,
The blisters on me..
The wrinkled up skin
When I’m oily & gray,
I’m learning to drive
In a most serious way..

And I know my poor brain ain’t right…
When I’m standing by your side.
I’m thinking about
My van all the time…
Motor oil is on my mind
And where & how it will apply

Cause I’ve just discovered,
My van’s taking over…
I’ll have to hide it from my mother-
The more I come
To understand
The clutch in my van…

 

Deck the Halls Parody #21903

Deck the halls with poison ivy!

Fa la la la la la la la la

Set the teacher’s hair on fire!

Fa la la la la la la la la

Break a window, pop a tire!

Fa la la la la la la la la

Tease the season to be naughty!

Fa la la la la la la la la!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

If You’re Happy And You Know It, Bomb Iraq

Parody of “If You’re Happy and You Know It.”

If You’re Happy And You Know It – Bomb Iraq
If you cannot find Osama, bomb Iraq.
If the terrorists are frisky,
Pakistan is looking shifty,
North Korea is too risky,
Bomb Iraq.

If we have no allies with us, bomb Iraq.
If we think that someone’s dissed us, bomb Iraq.
So to hell with the inspections,
Let’s look tough for the elections,
Close your mind and take directions,
Bomb Iraq.

It’s pre-emptive non-aggression, bomb Iraq.
To prevent this mass destruction, bomb Iraq.
They’ve got weapons we can’t see,
And that’s all the proof we need,
If they’re not there, they must be,
Bomb Iraq.

If you never were elected, bomb Iraq.
If your mood is quite dejected, bomb Iraq.
If you think Saddam’s gone mad,
With the weapons that he had,
And he tried to kill your dad,
Bomb Iraq.

If corporate fraud is growin’, bomb Iraq.
If your ties to it are showin’, bomb Iraq.
If your politics are sleazy,
And hiding that ain’t easy,
And your manhood’s getting queasy,
Bomb Iraq.

If your economy’s in repression, Bomb Iraq
If you fear a great depression, bomb Iraq
If you want lotsa oil,
Land on a countries soil,
Put the world in turmoil,
Bomb Iraq

Fall in line and follow orders, bomb Iraq.
For our might knows not our borders, bomb Iraq.
Disagree? We’ll call it treason,
Let’s make war not love this season,
Even if we have no reason,
Bomb Iraq

 

Get My Doctor On the Line

Parody of “Baby One More Time,” by Britney Spears.

There’s more than 1 way to “blow up”…

Oh baby baby
How was I supposed to grow?
Into this size 9 here..
Oh baby baby
The doc should have let me know..
And now my shirt’s too tight,yeah..
He asked me how many cc’s
of silicone that I could hold..

Now-

My Double D’s are killing me..
I must confess sometimes I leak..
My shirt’s see through you can see my spine,
Give me a dime..
Get my doctor on the line!

Oh baby baby-
I wheeze when I squeeze,it true.
I can feel the bones behind them..
Oh baby baby-
Can you cut each one in two..
Or maybe I could cram them..
Before-going on MTV..
Are they big enough for my new show..?

Because-

My Double D’s are killing me..(filling me)
I must confess sometimes I leak,(sometimes I leak)
My shirt’s see through,you can see my spine-
Give me a dime..
Get my doctor on the line!

Oh baby baby-
You know I’m suppose to blow
your money on my tight brassieres..
Oh baby baby
I shouldn’t have had the hose..
Go and fill them through my right ear..
You promised me an average c-
But these basketballs are hitting my nose..

And-

My Double D’s are killing me (spilling free)
I must confess sometimes I leak (sometimes I leak)
My shirt’s see through,you can see my spine-
Give me a dime..
Get my doctor on the line!

 

Say You’ll Grow Hair

Parody of “Say You’ll Be There” by the Spice Girls.

Say you’ll grow hair…
Say you’ll grow hair…

I’m getting a new hair piece
For this boy I see
This I swear…

Last time, you had an evaluation
I decided that I’d fix your split ends…yeah
But now I just twist them up in circles
Tell me when this growing bald spot will end…

Now you – tell me that you’re using a glove
Well the Velcro it should work easily…
This time, you gotta rake it easy, gently part it-
There’s just too much lotion for me…
Any fool can see that it’s falling,
Gotta take this hair to the can…. (Yes I do, yeah)

I’m getting a new hair piece
For this boy I see,this I swear…
And… all that I want from you,
Is a wig or two, to be there… (Say you’ll grow hair!)

If you, glue 2 more hairs together
Then we’ll see – what this hair spray is for…
If you – can’t fight this bald invasion…
I’ll just make you sweep the hair off the floor.
There is no weave, too frayed or ugly
It would be better left on your head. (Yes it would, yeah)

I’m getting a new hair piece
For this boy I see… this I swear (Say you’ll grow hair!)
And… all that I want from you,
Is a wig or two, to be there. (Yeah, toupees too)

I’m getting a new hair piece
For this boy I see ,this I swear… (Say you’ll grow hair!)
And… all that I want from you,
Is a wig or two to be there.