“the person in the tree is a woman!”
– davepoobond
Tag Archives: woman
Quote #16378
“that one woman does like everyone…”
– from somewhere around davepoobond’s high school
Quote #16306
“the impudent woman was very forward about her next door neighbor’s appearence”
– from somewhere around davepoobond’s high school
Quote #15594
“That’s about as likely as me being surrounded by naked 300 pound woman on the set of Frasier while I’m eating a bowl of onions and bugs with my feet cut off and placed on a serving tray for a long dead egyptian king”
– Nose
Quote #15487
“when you get into a gay relationship, you become a woman”
– from the Radio
Quote #14085
“Big bee Big bee, marries an albino woman…”
– Mrs. Biology Bitch
Quote #13845
“a woman is a grown-up girl. This sounds good”
– from a book
Quote #13400
“Andrew? The alcoholic womanizer? What’s HE doing here?”
– From a video game
Joke #13213
A woman patient sitting in the dentist chair opened her mouth as wide as she could. The dentist said, “You don’t have to open that wide. I don’t plan to stand inside.”
Joke #13012
A woman on a local bus was making a real pest of herself by asking the driver every few minutes, “Have we come to Walnut Drive yet?” After twenty minutes, she finally said, “Tell me, how will I know when we get to Walnut Drive?”
The driver turned to her and answered, “By the big smile on my face, lady!”
Joke #12923
DOCTOR: “How’s the woman who swallowed the spoon?”
NURSE: “She hasn’t stirred at all.”
Joke #12903
Did you hear about the bow-legged man who married a knock-kneed woman? When they stand together they spell out the word, “OX.”
Joke #12881
EXPLAIN THIS: A man who takes money out of a man’s pocket without permission is a pickpocket. A woman who takes money out of a man’s pockets without permission is a wife.
Joke #12855
A man should never marry a pretty woman. He should always marry an ugly woman. If a man marries a pretty woman and in a few months she gets tired of him and she runs off, he’s heartbroken. An ugly woman might run away too, but who cares?
Joke #12849
A drunk stumbled out of a bar, bumped into a telephone pole, knocked into a trash can, and then fell flat on the sidewalk right in front of an uppity old spinster.
“Sir,” scolded the woman coldly, “if I were in your condition, I’d shoot myself.”
“Lady,” stammered the man, “if you were in my condition, you’d miss.”