Tag Archives: sink

hwonhee

hwonhee – n. someone who is so poor that they have to use a combination of a toilet and a sink to wash their clothes because they don’t want to buy laundry detergent.  This causes them to flush the toilet three times and leave the sink on for five minutes straight.

Ex. I think my roommate is a hwonhee because no one can shit so much they have to flush three times.  What the fuck is he doing in there???

Dream #23036: The Baseball Dream

I wrote this in 2002.

I had a dream that I was the best pitcher on a baseball team, but I knew I wasn’t any good.

So this big championship game or something was there, but I didn’t get dressed, because when I put on my shoes, they caught on fire, then I put the fire out by blowing on it, but it relit, so I put it under the sink and it went out.

But it relit again and I just let it burn.

So the scene changed to the baseball game, and when I wasn’t there, they had a 2 foot tall 10 year old pitch for them instead.

They were losing pretty badly, when the assistant coach finally found me at home, and he said “we’re losing, you have to get dressed and play!” But I said, “no, I don’t want to get dressed!”

Then I woke up.

Quote #22368

As part of an experiment, KyleBurn, who is davepoobond’s and Quesogrande’s roommate was supposed to dehydrate himself.  KyleBurn was complaining all day about it and Quesogrande came home from work after a good hour or so of KyleBurn’s complaining.  Quesogrande didn’t know anything about the experiment or about the complaining KyleBurn had been doing.

Later, on the couch, Quesogrande, davepoobond, and KyleBurn are all in the living room.

KyleBurn:  “OH GOD, I’M SO THIRSTY!  AND I CAN’T HAVE ANY WATER!”

Quesogrande looked at KyleBurn for a couple seconds.

Quesogrande: “Why can’t you have water?  There’s water in the sink!”

KyleBurn gets pissed, and davepoobond laughs for five minutes straight.

– at davepoobond’s house.

Joke #9281: Shades of Grey

One day, a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast to her brunette hair.

The little girl looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, “Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?”

Her mother replied, “Well, every time you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white.”

The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then asked, “Momma, how come all of grandma’s hairs are white?”