Q: What is the definition of a farmer?
A: Someone who is outstanding in his field.
Q: What is the definition of a farmer?
A: Someone who is outstanding in his field.
Q: Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?
A: Because he was outstanding in his field.
When a farmer returned home from a vacation in Hawaii, his neighbor asked him to describe what a hula dance was like. Naturally the farmer explained the exotic dance in his own simple way. “The dancers put a crop of hay in the front field,” he said, “and they put another crop of hay in the back field. Then when the music starts, they rotate the crops.”
A man had been kept prisoner aboard a flying saucer for thirty years. When it finally returned to Earth, he escaped and ran across an open field yelling, “I’m free! I’m free!”
A small boy standing nearby said, “So what? I’m four!”
Q: What book concerns a body snatcher chasing a girl through a grain field?
A: Catch Her in the Rye.
Q: What’s warm, fresh, and full of grain?
A: A cow-pie in a wheat field.
hazunvia – v. to get married in a grassy meadow in the middle of nowhere
aguacate – v. to play guitar in a flower field
A blonde was sitting in the middle of a corn field, fishing. Another blonde pulls up in her car next to the corn field and says, “What the hell are you doing?” The blonde in the rowboat says, “I’m fishing.” The blonde in the car says, “I would come in there and fish too, but I can’t swim.”
A guy walks into a bar with his pet dog. The bartender says, ‘No pets allowed.’
The man replies, ‘This is a special dog. Turn on the Cowboys game and you’ll see.’
The bartender, anxious to see what will happen, turns on the game.
The guy says, ‘Watch. Whenever the Cowboys score, my dog does flips.’The Cowboys keep scoring field goals and the dog keeps flipping and jumping.
‘Wow! That’s one hekuva dog you got there! What happens when the Cowboys score a touchdown?’
The man replies, ‘I don’t know. I’ve only had him for 2 years.’
A father and son went hunting together for the first time.
The father said, “Stay here and be very QUIET. I’ll be across the field.” A few minutes later, the father heard a blood curdling scream and ran back to his son.
“What’s wrong?” the father asked. “I told you to be quiet.”
The son answered, “Look, I was quiet when the snake slithered across my feet. I was quiet when the bear breathed down my neck. But when the two squirrels crawled up my pant legs and said, ‘Should we eat them here or take them with us?’
“I guess I just panicked….”
belcmac – n. a field of claws