Tag Archives: clothing

Am I Confident?

Are you confident?  Answer the next 5 questions, and tally up your results at the end to see your fate.

Before a test you have studied for, you:

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When shopping for clothes, you:

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When you're at a restaurant, you:

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Would you say your friends in general are:

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What do you think are the realistic chances of achieving what deep in your heart you want to do when you are an adult?

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If you scored 12-15, fuck you.  No one likes a liar.

A score between 8-11 means you’re probably normal, but who are you really fooling?

If you score between 5-7, you’re low on the confidence scale.  Don’t worry, it’ll only get worse from here on out.  I could tell you all this sanctimonious bullshit about how it could get better, but really, you’re probably depressed and the only thing that will make you better are drugs.  And lots of them.

If you scored less than 5, you’re probably already doing drugs.

Joke #18569

I heard my wife mention one morning while getting ready for Church, “I sure need some new stockings.”

When she went into the bakery on the way home that afternoon, I spied a clothing store next door. So, I thought I would surprise her and went in to buy her some new stockings…

“Can I help you,” the saleslady asked.

“Yes, I would like to get some stockings for me wife please.”

“Sheer?” she asked.

“No, she’s not here,” I replied. “She’s next door at the bakery.”

Joke #18465

My husband is always complaining about my inability to stay on a budget and about the costs of running the house in general. This has become worse since we have had the twins.

Everything is double, clothes, food, pediatrician bills.  Lately, he has even been complaining about the amount of baby powder I have been using on the twins to prevent them from getting diaper rashes. I’ve had to remind him that…

talc is cheap.