Q: What is another name for a sleeping skeleton?
A: Lazy bones.
Joke #13307
Q: Why did Dracula’s mom give him cough syrup?
A: Because Dracula was coffin.
Joke #13306
Q: When is homework not homework?
A: When it is turned into the teacher.
Joke #13305
Q: What does a ship say when it is cold?
A: Shiver me timbers!
Joke #13304
Q: How do you fix a monkey?
A: With a monkey wrench.
Joke #13303
Q: What do you do if a rhino charges you?
A: Give him your credit card.
Joke #13302
Q: Why was the boy covered in gift wrap?
A: His mom told him to “live in the present.”
Joke #13301
Q: How do you get the water into watermelon?
A: Plant it in the spring.
Joke #13300
Q: What did the horse say when he tripped?
A: Help! I’ve fallen and I can’t giddy up!
Joke #13299
Q: Which city do people who talk a lot live?
A: Babylon.
Joke #13298
Q: What is a sea monster’s favorite snack?
A: Ships and dip.
Joke #13297
Q: What kind of tea is sometimes hard to swallow?
A: Reality.
Joke #13296
Q: What does a chicken and a band have in common?
A: They both have drum sticks.
Joke #13295
Q: Why didn’t the duck cross the grill?
A: He didn’t want to be a roast duck.
Joke #13294
New York City is so polluted that yesterday the mayor tried to sell Manhattan Island back to the Indians for about twenty-four dollars. The Indians didn’t want any part of the deal.