In the future many years ago,
you farted pee and poop could glow.
Scrambled headphones, Watermelon butt,
POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Category Archives: (C) Funny Poem
Are You a Good Sport?
Really bad sport!
Chill out grumpy!
Keep working on it!
Almost there!
GOOD SPORT!
Almost too good a sport!
Don’t be so nice!
Spell Chequer
Eye halve a spelling chequer
It came with my pea sea
It plainly marques four my revue
Miss steaks eye kin knot sea.
Eye strike a key and type a word
And weight four it two say
Weather eye am wrong oar write
It shows me strait a weigh.
As soon as a mist ache is maid
It nose bee fore two long
And eye can put the error rite
Its rare lea ever wrong.
Eye have run this poem threw it
I am shore your pleased two no
Its letter perfect awl the weigh
My chequer tolled me sew.
Ha ha
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha go smoke a guinea pig
giggly fresh
You know…
I don’t feel keeping tigers as pets is as cool as it seems
with the meat
and the fur
and the nails
and the teeth…
Is that corn between that tigers teeth?
That tiger has corn between his teeth.
How was that tiger eating corn?
What the hell’s going on here?
It’s not corn?
What it is then?
…pieces of a raincoat?
I’m sorry…I didn’t know.
An Ode To King Mongkut
I smoked a fire hydrant
I smoked a fire hydrant
I smoked a fire hydrant
WHO SMOKED MY PINBALL MACHINE
Why did I smoke the dishwasher
When all I did was eat?
Maybe my speaker blew up
But who knows
Who died
Who died
Who died
Go smoke a Sesame Street
Who died
Who died
Who died
Go shove a paper clip in the computer monitor
The Truth About my Family
My brother is a woman
My sister is a man
My parents are the messed up ones
They are the taliban!
Oh my God!
Oh my god!
Dacky is my god!
D.I.M.G! D.I.M.G!
He should be yours too,
So go and take a poo!
Everyone loves poo,
Especially ones that are blue!
I think it’s time
I’m running out of rhymes,
To end this poem.
Remember kids,
ALL HAIL DACKY!
The Rain in Bahrain
The rain
in Bahrain
is insane
in the membrane.
It causes me pain
to see the rain
in Bahrain.
I fly in my plane
to the plains
of Maine
to escape the rain
in Bahrain.
The plains of Maine
are plain,
but they are not nearly as inane
as the rain
in Bahrain.
I’d like to go to Spain
to escape the rain
in Bahrain.
THE RAIN
IN BAHRAIN
DRIVES ME INSAAAAAAAAAANE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
A Man from Nam
There once was a man from ‘Nam
who took tablets to keep him calm
one day he ran out
his legs turned to gout
and now he walks with his arm
The Ghetto Gremlin
For a gremlin like me pimpin’ ain’t easy
a life in the fruitbat g r -shEeezy
im a grem-pimp, money comes hard to even buy clothes
the closest I get to gremlin love is when im bangin my hoes
it’s a good thing cuz I dont even pay for those
they give me gremlin love, they give me gremlin blows
for a green man livin in tha cave life is ubsurd
I am holgin it down eat other animals dried turd
my gromeboys say turtle is good but I say bird
i spoke to him in gremluage and he was like word
put my ghetto prescription lenses on and fly in the sky
im a pimp by night so my gremgirls ride by
i go to the salon to get my sharp nails done
understand we can die if we go out in the sun
its over, this is the end of my rap
a legendary grempimp ill always be good at that!
Those People
She is different
She is scary
You are frightening
He is large
He is fat
You are humongous
She has pride
She is haughty
You are conceited
He has glasses
He has seeing problems
You are a four eyes
He likes beer
He drinks beer a lot
You are an alcoholic
She is thin
She is skinny
You are punny
He is smart
He is gifted
You are a nerd
She is strong
She is burly
Your are a man
He is average
He isn’t smart
You’re dumb
He likes to work
He works too much
You are a workaholic
I am….assertive
You are…outspoken
He is….agressive
Hi Dacky!
hmm…
HI DACKY!!!
HI HI HI HI!!
HOW ARE YOU?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!!?!?!?
HIHIHIHIHHIHI!!!
hi dacky mister sir mam…
how are you doing?!
Weeeeeeeee
Ponderous Poop…
I have a ponderouses poop,
Like dr suess.
When ever it ponderizez,
I say the word droop.
It is a smart ass,
Like bad billy bass,
If it messes with me,
I will never go pee.
That is my story of the ponderouses poop….DROOP!
My Uncle The Turd Chaser
He works in waste water and thinks it is cool
I ask him a question, “whats really in that pool?”
His nickname is “Turd Chaser” but he dont know it,
His wifes a ding-bat, but she dont “blow-it”.
He owns a hot tub, and thinks his poopie dont stink,
But I got news for him, I crapped in his kitchen sink!
I am so jealous cuz his tities are bigger than mine.
I really want to kick him in his behind!
Go chase your turds you you freak!
No body likes you but your big turds!
Eat your turds!!!
Eat your turds and Die!
Die from turditis!!!
Happy 40th Birthday!!!