Sister: Well, how are you doing with that electronic drum set that you got for Christmas?
Brother: Great. It’s the most wonderful present I ever got.
Sister: Why’s that?
Brother: Dad pays me two dollars a week not to play it.
Category Archives: Jokes
The whole Joke archive. Tons of jokes!
Joke #11427
April: Well, where’s your new guitar?
John: Oh, I had to throw it away.
April: You threw it away? Why?
John: It had a hole in the middle!
Joke #11426
Frank: I wish you’d only sing Christmas carols.
Megan: Why?
Frank: Because then you’d only have to sing once a year!
Joke #11425
Richard: Was that you singing as I came in?
Fran: Yes. I was killing time before my singing lesson.
Richard: Well, you’re sure using the right weapon.
Joke #11424
Sister: Well, how did you do on that math test yesterday?
Brother: I only got one problem wrong.
Sister: That’s great! How many problems were there?
Brother: Twenty.
Sister: So you got nineteen out of twenty right?
Brother: No. I couldn’t do the other nineteen!
Joke #11423
Sister: What’s the matter with you? Mom told you to watch when the soup boils!
Brother: I did! It boiled at exactly 6:25!
Joke #11422
Sister: Mom asked you to put salt in the salt shaker. Why didn’t you do it?
Brother: I tried, but I couldn’t get the salt through those tiny holes!
Joke #11421
Sister: Did you clean that fish before you put it in the frying pan?
Brother: Why should I clean it? It couldn’t get dirty in the water!
Sister: Well, what kind of fish is it?
Brother: Smelt.
Sister: I know it did. But what kind of fish is it?
Joke #11420
Sister: Mom and Dad just bought me a bird for a pet.
Brother: What kind of bird?
Sister: A keet.
Brother: Don’t you mean a parakeet?
Sister: No. They just bought me one.
Joke #11419
Sister: Why is it you get into more trouble than anyone else in the family?
Brother: I guess it’s because I get up first!
Joke #11418
Sister: Mom wants you to come in and help fix dinner.
Brother: Why? Is it broken?
Joke #11417
Brother: Do you know what I’m going to give Mom for her birthday? A beautiful cut-glass flower vase.
Sister: But she already has a beautiful cut-glass flower vase.
Brother: No, she doesn’t. I just dropped it!
Sister: Did you tell Mom you broke the vase?
Brother: Yes. I said, “Mom, do you remember that vase you always worried that I would break?” And she said, “Yes, what about it?” And I said, “Your worries are over!”
Joke #11416
Sister: Uh-oh. Dad’s really going to be mad when he sees the big hole you dug in the front yard. What are you going to do with all that dirt?
Brother: Don’t worry about it. I’m going to dig another big hole and bury it all!
Joke #11415
Sister: Aw, you’re a baby. You’re afraid to go upstairs in the dark by yourself!
Brother: I am not!
Sister: Yes, you are. Fraidy cat! Fraidy cat!
Brother: I am not afraid. You come up with me and see!
Joke #11414
Sister: Mom just cleaned your room. She says you’re not fit to live with pigs.
Brother: Oh yeah? And what did you say?
Sister: I stuck up for you. I said you were.