Getting married is like joining the Army. If you don’t go in on the buddy system the battles will be pure hell.
Category Archives: Jokes
The whole Joke archive. Tons of jokes!
Joke #13158
Whenever my wife and I have an argument, I always listen to both sides of the story — my wife’s and my mother-in-law’s.
Joke #13157
A teenaged girl came home and complained to her mother, “Not only has Danny broken my heart and spoiled my entire life, but he’s wrecked my whole evening too!”
Joke #13156
WIFE: “I hear your Uncle Harry is now doing settlement work.”
HUSBAND: “Yep! His creditors finally caught up with him.”
Joke #13155
Two young brothers were in their backyard. The first boy asked, “Did Dad promise you something if you took out the garbage?”
His brother replied, “No, but he promised me something if I didn’t.”
Joke #13154
A teenaged girl said, “I’ll tell you this, a lot of men are going to be sick when I marry.”
Her brother put down his school book and asked, “Gosh! How many are you going to marry?”
Joke #13153
OVERHEARD: “My wife doesn’t like to play with fire. That’s why we haven’t had a hot meal in our house for months.”
Joke #13152
MRS. BROWN: “Today I broke a very expensive dish.”
MRS. GREEN: “What did your husband say?”
MRS. BROWN: “Ouch! What hit me?”
Joke #13151
A son asked her father, Hey, Pop, can I have 10 bucks to buy a skateboard?”
The father replied, “No! Look, Johnny, you should try to use your brains to raise the 10 dollars yourself.”
About five minutes later the lad returned and said, “Well, I raised the 10 dollars.”
The father asked, “How?”
The youngster smiled and said, “I asked Mom for it.”
Joke #13150
MALE GUEST: “Where is your wife?”
HUSBAND: “She’s in the kitchen fixing dinner. But in my opinion, it’s beyond repair.”
Joke #13149
I have the only wife in the world who has to pay her beautician combat pay.
Joke #13148
Your momma is like a TV, even a two-year-old can turn her on.
Joke #13147
My mother-in-law is so old that when she was in school, history was called current events.
Joke #13146
I think my wife is trying to tell me something. Last night she tied my tie for me… in a hangman’s noose!
Joke #13145
I know our marriage is no longer meaningful to my husband. The other day he made a paper airplane out of our marriage certificate and sailed it out the window.