A taxi was slowly creeping along a packed New York City street during rush hour. The passenger in the back seat cried, “Can’t you go any faster?”
The cab driver turned around and quipped, “Yes, I can, but I’m not allowed to get out of the taxi.”
All posts by davepoobond
Joke #13054
Bank teller to man at his window in bank: “I’m sorry, Mr. Page, but your wife beat you to the draw.”
Joke #13053
A boss was interviewing a man for a job in the factory. The boss said, “You’re asking a lot of money for a man with no experience.”
The man answered, “I know, but it’s much harder to do work when you don’t know anything about it.”
Joke #13052
A man rushed into a restaurant one morning and said to the waitress behind the counter, “Will the pancakes be long?”
The waitress replied, “Nope! They’re always round.”
Joke #13051
I feel as unhappy as a fly on a frog’s tongue.
Joke #13050
I feel as uncomfortable as a polar bear under a sun lamp.
Joke #13049
I feel as uncomfortable as a whale in a sardine can.
Joke #13048
I feel as out of place as a tailor in a nudist colony.
Joke #13047
I feel as out of place as a hockey player in the Sahara Desert.
Joke #13046
Nobody likes me. Even birds ignore my feeder.
Joke #13045
I’m so frail that the last time someone kicked sand in my face, the grains knocked me out cold.
Joke #13044
I’m a man who can live by bread alone. I can’t even afford butter.
Joke #13043
If I decided to write a novel about all the exciting things that happened to me during my life I’d end up with a short story.
Joke #13042
I would never get cloned. I wouldn’t want to make another fool of myself.
Joke #13041
Nobody cares what happens to me. I’m the only pedestrian in New York with a license to jaywalk.