ettrramufnideaasbi – v. to sleep in a bed with a sledgehammer that does not have any sheets, so you are sleeping right on the mattress itself.
Speed Racer: What a crappy day. I think I’ll go back inside. (Walks inside.)
Mr. Game & Watch: Hey bud, you’re walking like me.
Speed Racer: So?
Mr. Game & Watch: That’s my bit! That’s how I walk in Super Smash Bros. Melee!
(Mr. Game & Watch hits the B Button and flips bacon in Speed Racer’s face)
Speed Racer: Ouch! That’s greasy!
(Speed Racer gets in his Mach 5 car)
Speed Racer: IT’S ON!
(Meanwhile, in Hell…)
One-legged Squirrel: Another play with a car? I’ll sit this one out.
Satan: Hey, I’m not slave-driving you to talk.
(Meanwhile, back in the unspecified setting…)
Mr. Game & Watch: You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry!
(Mr. Game & Watch turns red by hitting the Y button before the match.)
John Tesh: This calls for some quality fightin’ music. You two just get it on, and I’ll take care of the tunes.
(Speed Racer and Mr. Game & Watch stare one another down.)
Speed Racer: Are you ready?
Mr. Game & Watch: Let’s get this over with.
(Speed Racer runs over John Tesh. Mr. Game & Watch makes John Tesh fly off the screen with his smash hammer [B Button].)
Speed Racer: That felt good. Now, I must leave. I have a race.
Mr. Game & Watch: And I’m a guest on Carson Daly’s show.
Q: What would you get if you crossed a sledgehammer with a Valentine?
A: A real heartbreaker.
“He’s got a hammer! Go!”
– from the TV
“The old anvil laughs at many broken hammers. There are men who can’t be bought”
– Carl Sandburg
BOSS: “Smith has a fractured skull. How did the accident happen?”
JONES: “Well, Smith said to me, ‘I’ll hold this spike and when I nod my head, hit it with the sledgehammer.”
PRISONER: “I’ve got a complaint. The judge sentenced me to prison for the rest of my life.”
WARDEN: “So what’s your complaint?”
PRISONER: “Breaking rocks with a sledgehammer is not my idea of a rest.”
Mother: Why are you taking that hammer to bed?
Bob: I want to hit the hay!
Q: Why did the man take a hammer to bed?
A: He wanted to hit the sack.
gavel – n. the hammer a judge uses in a court room, and to bash people’s head with. Verrry speical. Made out of wood!