#23308: davepoobond -> stimpyismyname

davepoobond: what can you use it for

stimpyismyname: stuff

davepoobond: that’s alwasy good

stimpyismyname: alwasy

stimpyismyname: you big fagget

davepoobond: yes

davepoobond: alwasy

davepoobond: it means “stimpyismyname is a faggot”

davepoobond: and the continuation

davepoobond: always

davepoobond: which means “stimpyismyname is a faggot cause he spells faggot with an e instead of an o”

stimpyismyname: yeah shut up

stimpyismyname: i can

stimpyismyname: if i want it to sound like that

stimpyismyname: it was bostonian

davepoobond: like what?

davepoobond: fajet?

davepoobond: fajeet

stimpyismyname: right…

 

#23304: Yonseixryu -> Soup Nazi

Yonseixryu: so it’s like the navy with the dont ask dont tell thinng

Yonseixryu: that’s gay

Soup Nazi: Nope

Yonseixryu: hahaha rofl

Yonseixryu: i just made a funny

Yonseixryu: ]lol rofl rofl rofl

Soup Nazi: Not really.

Yonseixryu: You’r not laughing

Yonseixryu: You’r not laughing

Yonseixryu: join in on the festivity

Yonseixryu: lol

Yonseixryu: lol

Yonseixryu: lol lol lol lol lol lol lol

Yonseixryu: lol with me

 

#22517: davepoobond -> CoolArcade

davepoobond: hey

CoolArcade: hi

davepoobond: do you wanna watch bi, curious guys hook up with bi curious transvestites and watch them suck each other off for hours on end with me?

CoolArcade: umm.no

davepoobond: why the fuck not

CoolArcade: cuz

CoolArcade: no

davepoobond: cuz no why

Previous message was not received by CoolArcade because of error: User CoolArcade is not available.

 

#22511: Phoenix -> Hotkid05

Phoenix: Hey

Phoenix: You into Yaoi?

Hotkid05: whos this

Phoenix: Adam

Phoenix: You know me.

Hotkid05: adam who

Phoenix: Don’t fuck around man, you KNOW who this is.

Hotkid05: im serious adam who

Phoenix: So whats up? We havn’t talked for a while.

Hotkid05: nm

Phoenix: How you been?

Hotkid05: where u from

Hotkid05: good u

Phoenix: Alright

Hotkid05: where do u live at

Phoenix: …

Phoenix: You still acting like you don’t know me bro?

Hotkid05: where

Phoenix: Fine, fuck you too.

Phoenix: We talked for months!

Hotkid05: im drunk as hell

Phoenix: Now I’m not your boy? Now you act like I’m nothing?

Phoenix: Go fuckyourself man, I don’t need you.

Hotkid05: im sorry

Phoenix: ….alright, alright.

Phoenix: But stop playin man,you know I don’t like that shit

Hotkid05: do u know my name??

Phoenix: No, we only talked online.

Hotkid05: r u straight??

Phoenix: The hell? You a moron or something? Can’t you remember anything?

Hotkid05: yea im sorry

Hotkid05: how r u

Phoenix: Fine, annoyed at you asking all this stupid shit though.

Hotkid05: my bad

Phoenix: It’s alright holmes, it’s fine.

Hotkid05: do u have a girl now

Phoenix: Hell ya boy, you know me. I can get em whenever I try.

Phoenix: Broke up with that other girl though, ya remember Faith?

Phoenix: Oh, of course you don’t, lol.

Hotkid05: yea

Phoenix: How bout you?

Hotkid05: no kidding

Hotkid05: no

Phoenix: Man, that sucks.

Hotkid05: i need 2 get laid

Phoenix: Heh, I hear that.

Phoenix: Course, it must be hard.

Hotkid05: why u say that

Phoenix: I mean you don’t remember shit, you act dumb all the time.

Hotkid05: thanx

Phoenix: Like this shit you were pulling with me.

Hotkid05: my bad man

Phoenix: If I was a girl I woulda called you a fag, man.

Phoenix: Course you are a fuckin fag.

Phoenix: I mean you act all quire and dainty.

Phoenix: Plus all that sick porn you look at?

Phoenix: That’s fucked up man.

Phoenix: I mean, all those links you were sending me…

Phoenix: “Big booty ass sucking” God, sick shit.

Phoenix: No wonder you pretend you don’t know me, I’d be embarrased too.

Phoenix: Course you were drunk but still…

Phoenix: You there, holmes?

Phoenix: Meh, you’re probably wanking it to some of that weird gay cartoon guy shit again, may you fucked up

 

The Not So Returned Rental Book

This entry is part 23 of 26 in the series The Retail Report

On April 11, I had a customer today call me after talking to another co-worker of mine who was just finishing up with her shift.  He was calling regarding his rental textbook that he has but also “returned.”

Earlier when he was talking to my co-worker, he had said that he had the book still and wanted to return it but did not want to pay for the replacement fee.  She wrote his information down and said he would be coming in later this week to pay for the book.

So then, he called during the beginning of my shift and explained how he had actually returned said book, which is the Intro to Statistics, a non-serialized rental, which is a book without a specific number attached to it.

I explained to him that our system had shown that the book was not returned and that it would need to be paid for at the replacement price.  He went on to talk about how that is penalizing him for incompetence on our part because he is saying that he was not given a receipt and when he returned it to “the guy” who had said that he did not need a receipt.  I told him we were telling all of our cashiers to give receipts for any rentals returned.  I asked him if he knew who the cashier was and he said he didn’t know.  He kept repeating the same stuff over and over again, and I kept saying the same things, too.  I told him that the only way I can personally help is if he had a receipt, and otherwise I would have to have him talk to my manager about it.

He was not satisfied with that, and kept saying how it was a bureaucratic answer and basically didn’t see why he had to be penalized and kept saying the same thing over and over.  He kept saying he wasn’t given a receipt, when I told him that was the only way we’d be able to release the hold on his account, and kept repeating that asking if “it was sticking” to what I had been considering talking to him about it, to which I said, yes, but it was to not going to alleviate anything.  I asked if he had returned any other rentals along with the Intro to Statistics and said that he had returned some health book.  I told him that there would be no way that only one book from a transaction would show as returned if they were both returned, but then he spouted out more about bureaucracy again.

So, anyway, I tell him again if he would like to speak to my manager, he is able to and I gave him my manager’s extension as well as transferred him over to his voice mail once he was done talking to me.  He finally accepted the proposition and I did so.

He then proceeded to call about 5 or so minutes later, after I was telling my supervisor about the call.  I answered it, knowing that it was the same guy, but pretending like I didn’t know what just happened.  The guy asked specifically to see if my manager was in and I asked what it was regarding and if I could take a message since he was not going to be in until the next day.  He didn’t tell me his name that time, and he simply said he was a disgruntled student and was given “bad customer service” and “terrible answers” by two employees who work here and that he wanted to complain about “them” (which would most likely be my co-worker and myself) regarding his book situation, and to also solve the situation regarding his rental.

So, he came in on that Thursday and instead of dealing with anymore of his bull shit, my manager let him off the hook for the book.  I really wanted that guy to pay for being an asshole.  Turns out he was gay and said to apologize to me for being “a bitch.”

Okay, then.  Fuck you, you bitch.

 

Squacklecast Episode 4 – “DJ Honey, Drop It!”

This entry is part 4 of 31 in the series The Squacklecast

DJ HONEY, DROP IT!

Now onto what we actually talk about.

This week we talk about The Lucky One, starring Zac Efron, and how dumb the premise sounds without actually watching the movie!

Zac Efron’s bra trick apparently makes him a super hero.

Dear John is a little more sensible than The Lucky One, wouldn’t you say?

Don’t you get it?  I FORGOT what THE VOW was which was ABOUT AMNESIA?!??!

Rachel McAdams is apparently in movies.

Channing Tatum wasn’t the standout figure in the first GI Joe.

GI Joe Retaliation can’t be worse than the first one… right?

EVERYBODY’S DEAD!!!

Rachel Nichols is so beautiful…

She was in P2

With Wes Bentley

Jonathan Pryce as “U.S. President” in GI Joe 2?  NOT BELIEVABLE

Zac Efron and Channing Tatum in a gay romance movie?  It’s gonna happen.  DAT BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN MARKET.

Charlie St. Cloud is a movie about Zac Efron getting dating tips from his dead younger brother’s ghost.  And something about sailing?

Pretty In Pink, I like that shit.

Theres about 100 more GI Joe characters to kill off before they reboot the franchise.

Everything you need to know about the ThunderCats.

I hate musicals.  And just because its a gay-themed one doesn’t mean I’m going to be guilted into liking it!

And this BearCity movie looks pretty gross.  Lots of hair.  I get enough of that in the mirror.

The Sound of Music is gay in the happy way.

“Video Team” is an amazing name for a company.

Edward Penishands???

Thanks for listening this week.  Maybe next week we’ll talk about more porn.