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sadauerasg

May 29th, 2015 Posted in Dictionary | No Comments »

sadauerasg – n. a long list of made up words you keep for years until you are able to define them arbitrarily

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rellevse

May 29th, 2015 Posted in Dictionary | No Comments »

rellevse – n. a rip in the material of your bed sheets.  Can also apply to a fart you make underneath your bed sheets.

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agerado

May 29th, 2015 Posted in Dictionary | No Comments »

agerado – n. a 71 minute lunch break

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argilm

May 29th, 2015 Posted in Dictionary | No Comments »

argilm – n. a list of passwords you stick on your monitor or under your keyboard

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enga

May 29th, 2015 Posted in Dictionary | No Comments »

enga – n. your favorite bathroom stall

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odicen

May 29th, 2015 Posted in Dictionary | No Comments »

odicen – v. to hold your piss in for so long you start leaking.  It is used in the situation where you don’t have any abnormalities/medical conditions, and you’re just procrastinating in taking care of business

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stila

May 29th, 2015 Posted in Dictionary | No Comments »

stila – n. an old man with a bagel

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Quote #23856

May 27th, 2015 Posted in Quotes | No Comments »

“The cause of the explosion happened, because the president of the U.S. didn’t want to take the insults in anymore.”

– davepoobond, for a 7th grade writing assignment

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Quote #23855

May 27th, 2015 Posted in Quotes | No Comments »

“It was obvious that the oblivious child had jumped off the cliff.”

– davepoobond, for a 7th grade writing assignment

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Quote #23853

May 27th, 2015 Posted in Quotes | No Comments »

“‘Whether or not the weather will be sunny or not we will have rain,’ the weather reporter said.”

– davepoobond, for a 7th grade writing assignment

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Quote #23852

May 27th, 2015 Posted in Quotes | No Comments »

“The affect of the explosion caused the side effect of a nuclear winter.”

– davepoobond, for a 7th grade writing assignment

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Quote #23851

May 27th, 2015 Posted in Quotes | No Comments »

“‘The role of the person lying on the street is to roll out of the way before the car runs over him so that the car would swerve to the right and blow up to try not to hit him,’ said the drama teacher.”

– davepoobond, for a 7th grade writing assignment

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Quote #23850

May 27th, 2015 Posted in Quotes | No Comments »

“The most exciting part of the show was when we were exiting from the theatre.”

– davepoobond, for a 7th grade writing assignment

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Quote #23849

May 27th, 2015 Posted in Quotes | No Comments »

“I have a suit in the suite in the hotel, and there are sweets on the table that you may help yourself to also.”

– davepoobond, for a 7th grade writing assignment

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Letter to Scott the Naturalist

May 27th, 2015 Posted in Dave's Kingdom, Screwed Up Chronicles | No Comments »

I wrote this as a “thank you” note to Scott, who was a Naturalist at a school camp I was forced to go to in 6th grade.

March 16, 1998

Dear Scott,

My name is davepoobond, and I was in your group (duh, I wouldn’t be writing to you then). My favorite activities were eating and sleeping.

One special thing I learned was to never ever climb up a mountain more than 3 inches tall. I learned this from OUCHY-OUCHY Mountain and going up the “Check This Out” trail. It should’ve had a big sign that said, “ABANDON ALL HOPE YE WHO ENTER HERE!!!!!” and it should’ve been called, “ The Freaky Trail from HECK!!!!!”

Sincerely,
davepoobond

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