Category Archives: Stupid IMs

These are the Stupid IMs. They’re stupid, duh. 1 to 1 messaging.

#23070: alediayaojou -> davepoobond

alediayaojou: hi cutie pie

davepoobond: hi

alediayaojou: heeey ~! how are you today …

davepoobond: hi

alediayaojou: well im home ..not much to do .. are you busy? ? πŸ™‚

davepoobond: im jackin off

davepoobond: to pictures of you

alediayaojou: oohh well wanted to see if you wanted to chat in private right now ?? if your alone of course πŸ˜‰ … i am πŸ˜‰

davepoobond: that i found before you IMd me

davepoobond: i stalk you

davepoobond: did you know that

alediayaojou: ok well πŸ˜‰ ..just go here babe , just click on the accept the invite GREEN button … hurry my cam is on already …

davepoobond: did you know

davepoobond: that i knew who you are already

davepoobond: and that i have a video camera that you dont know about

davepoobond: from across the street

davepoobond: on your house

alediayaojou: can you see ME??? … πŸ˜‰ very sexy huh …lol well this site is soo cool .. we can chat with other girls in a big chat room … its like a big orgy lol plus its free with my friend pass PLEASE DONT GIVE IT OUT!lol

davepoobond: but why would i need to go there, i have my own feed

alediayaojou: k papi rico i cant hear you or see wut your wrighting till you sign in soo ill be waiting just fill out the info for your account and the cc is just for age verification ok… here it is just in case you didnt get it πŸ™‚

davepoobond: are you retarded

alediayaojou: ok babe im ready, were are you?? you sign up ???im wet and waiting lol literly lol

davepoobond: why are you wet

davepoobond: did you run through the sprinklers again

alediayaojou: mhhm nice and wet lol

alediayaojou: K bye , ill be waiting …xoxo

davepoobond: wait

davepoobond: where are you going

davepoobond: never mind, i can see where you’re going

davepoobond: mwahahahah

davepoobond: hahahahahah

alediayaojou: k

davepoobond: yeah

davepoobond: you know it

davepoobond: hi

#22656: sunny_girl -> davepoobond

sunny_girl: hey how are you? i love Donnie Darko! every time i hear that song from the movie i can’t help but sing along and think of frank!!!

davepoobond: yeah the song instantly reminds me of that movie too. i’ve probably seen it about 10 or 15 times all together. did you read much into the conclusion of the story that much? which interpretation did you prescribe to?

sunny_girl: there are all kinds of things…telling the future, he’s posesed, its a dream, they go back in time, its a relfection of the past, he has schizophrenia…there are so many things. i get something new each time i watch it

davepoobond: well, i know that, i was just wondering which one you believed it was

sunny_girl: lol i think its a dream which do you think

davepoobond: i think it had more to do with the universe needing to explain to itself where the airplane jet engine came from, so it created the alternate path to show what would happen had donnie lived. i thought it was the more believable explanation rather than the religious one or just it being a dream, which I suppose is the less complex explanation.

sunny_girl: That is pretty complex.

#22655: DizzyLizzy -> davepoobond

DizzyLizzy: Hi,
I noticed you looked at the profile and saw I am in Oregon. Sorry about that, I lived in your city before here, and I think I was just messing around, and missing home a little bit, so I was looking at people near there. I didn’t really need to explain all that, but I guess I did anyway. It is sad what being away from home does to a person.
Elizabeth

#22575: Mrs. Whooty -> davepoobond

Mrs. Whooty: Yoyo

davepoobond: who be this

Mrs. Whooty: Hello there.. My name is Mrs Whooty.. Got ur ID through Messenger Directory πŸ™‚

davepoobond: why did you im me

Mrs. Whooty: I love chatting with new people.. Would you like to chat today? Where are you from?

davepoobond: Tajikistan

Mrs. Whooty: Can i ask you a quest?

davepoobond: do i get 1000 xp after

Mrs. Whooty: Do you like big booty girls with big tits? lol seriously cuz thats what i am/have..Is that too much for you to handle?

davepoobond: do you like to drive a camaro or a tricycle

Mrs. Whooty: Do you know what a whooty is? Would you like to see me i’ll show you my Whooty….

davepoobond: loooool

Mrs. Whooty: lol Whooty is a White Girl with a BOOTY! i wanna show u mine…

davepoobond: looooool

davepoobond: loooool

davepoobond: loool

Mrs. Whooty: ok let me set up my camera for you honey..

Lovely Text Message #22560: ZeeHu -> davepoobond

It should be noted there was a long period of no communication between myself and ZeeHu before this text message appeared:

ZeeHu: Hey! How r u!?! Question…u know how to hack an acct? =D lol

davepoobond: ummm no I don’t. Β Kind of a weird question =p. I’m doing ok otherwise how about you

ZeeHu: Lol ur the internet person I know so I thought I would ask lol thanks πŸ™‚ I’m good too…and no I wasn’t trying to hack urs πŸ˜‰

davepoobond: Haha ok then

#22517: davepoobond -> CoolArcade

davepoobond: hey

CoolArcade: hi

davepoobond: do you wanna watch bi, curious guys hook up with bi curious transvestites and watch them suck each other off for hours on end with me?

CoolArcade: umm.no

davepoobond: why the fuck not

CoolArcade: cuz

CoolArcade: no

davepoobond: cuz no why

Previous message was not received by CoolArcade because of error: User CoolArcade is not available.

#22511: Phoenix -> Hotkid05

Phoenix: Hey

Phoenix: You into Yaoi?

Hotkid05: whos this

Phoenix: Adam

Phoenix: You know me.

Hotkid05: adam who

Phoenix: Don’t fuck around man, you KNOW who this is.

Hotkid05: im serious adam who

Phoenix: So whats up? We havn’t talked for a while.

Hotkid05: nm

Phoenix: How you been?

Hotkid05: where u from

Hotkid05: good u

Phoenix: Alright

Hotkid05: where do u live at

Phoenix: …

Phoenix: You still acting like you don’t know me bro?

Hotkid05: where

Phoenix: Fine, fuck you too.

Phoenix: We talked for months!

Hotkid05: im drunk as hell

Phoenix: Now I’m not your boy? Now you act like I’m nothing?

Phoenix: Go fuckyourself man, I don’t need you.

Hotkid05: im sorry

Phoenix: ….alright, alright.

Phoenix: But stop playin man,you know I don’t like that shit

Hotkid05: do u know my name??

Phoenix: No, we only talked online.

Hotkid05: r u straight??

Phoenix: The hell? You a moron or something? Can’t you remember anything?

Hotkid05: yea im sorry

Hotkid05: how r u

Phoenix: Fine, annoyed at you asking all this stupid shit though.

Hotkid05: my bad

Phoenix: It’s alright holmes, it’s fine.

Hotkid05: do u have a girl now

Phoenix: Hell ya boy, you know me. I can get em whenever I try.

Phoenix: Broke up with that other girl though, ya remember Faith?

Phoenix: Oh, of course you don’t, lol.

Hotkid05: yea

Phoenix: How bout you?

Hotkid05: no kidding

Hotkid05: no

Phoenix: Man, that sucks.

Hotkid05: i need 2 get laid

Phoenix: Heh, I hear that.

Phoenix: Course, it must be hard.

Hotkid05: why u say that

Phoenix: I mean you don’t remember shit, you act dumb all the time.

Hotkid05: thanx

Phoenix: Like this shit you were pulling with me.

Hotkid05: my bad man

Phoenix: If I was a girl I woulda called you a fag, man.

Phoenix: Course you are a fuckin fag.

Phoenix: I mean you act all quire and dainty.

Phoenix: Plus all that sick porn you look at?

Phoenix: That’s fucked up man.

Phoenix: I mean, all those links you were sending me…

Phoenix: “Big booty ass sucking” God, sick shit.

Phoenix: No wonder you pretend you don’t know me, I’d be embarrased too.

Phoenix: Course you were drunk but still…

Phoenix: You there, holmes?

Phoenix: Meh, you’re probably wanking it to some of that weird gay cartoon guy shit again, may you fucked up

#22509: davepoobond -> Automatic Man

davepoobond: hot in. dun dunnn…………hot in HEEERRRREEEE

Automatic Man: ?

davepoobond: <>?

davepoobond: >^<

davepoobond: <^>

davepoobond: ^^>><<^^

davepoobond: ^^>><<>><<^^

Automatic Man: wtf?

davepoobond: >:o

Automatic Man: wtf are you doing

davepoobond: :-X

Automatic Man: how come i see ur messeges in a window, then i send em in a different 1?

davepoobond: me no no

davepoobond: πŸ˜›

#22507: davepoobond -> zackrat123

davepoobond: heyyy!!!

zackrat123: hey

davepoobond: been a while

zackrat123: who is this?

zackrat123: ya

davepoobond: you don’t remember?

zackrat123: nope

davepoobond: i’m your cousin, Richard

zackrat123: o hi richard

davepoobond: hi

zackrat123: i havent seen u in like 5 years

davepoobond: yeah i know

davepoobond: sucks don’t it

zackrat123: ya

davepoobond: so how’s life been treatin’ ya

zackrat123 signed off at 4:56:46 PM.

zackrat123 signed on at 4:56:52 PM.

davepoobond: how’s life been treatin’ ya

zackrat123: good

zackrat123: im jkin i no ur not my cousin richard i dont even have a cousin richard

davepoobond: =-O

davepoobond: you’ve been fuckin around with me

zackrat123: ya

davepoobond: here i am in my identity crisis

davepoobond: trying to find out who i am

davepoobond: and you fuck around with me

zackrat123: hehehe

davepoobond: by the way, hyundai makes civics

zackrat123: o

zackrat123: no honda civic

davepoobond: hyundai civic, you jackass

davepoobond: don’t fall in

zackrat123: dont fall in wat

davepoobond: your own shit

davepoobond: cause you’re just full of it

zackrat123: o

zackrat123: ok

zackrat123: but search for honda civic and it will show it

davepoobond: unh hunh..

davepoobond: tell me other funny jokes

zackrat123 wants to directly connect.

zackrat123: accept

zackrat123 is now directly connected.

davepoobond: dood

zackrat123: (shows a picture of a Honda civic)

zackrat123: honda civic

zackrat123: but y do u want to know

davepoobond: no reason

davepoobond: mwah

davepoobond: mwahahahah

davepoobond: nayway1@3!

zackrat123 direct connection is closed.

zackrat123: ok

davepoobond: have you been to my website

zackrat123: nope

davepoobond: g-g-g-g-g-g-go

zackrat123: wat is it

davepoobond: a humor site

zackrat123: wats the link

davepoobond: www.squackle.com

zackrat123: eeewwwwww

davepoobond: ?

zackrat123: i went to it

davepoobond: ok

davepoobond: what’s so ewwww about it

zackrat123: i didnt go to it but i dont want to

davepoobond: ok!

davepoobond: Why do you think you think that i think what?

zackrat123: ?

zackrat123 signed off at 5:07:41 PM.