Two rabbis walk into a bank.
While waiting in line, bank robbers storm inside, not only robbing the bank but also forcing the customers to hand over their own money and jewelry.
One rabbi slips something into the hand of the other rabbi.
“What is this?” the rabbi whispered.
The other rabbi replied, “It’s the fifty bucks I owe you.”
A priest and a rabbi were walking down the side walk.
On the other side of the street they see a 12 year old boy.
The priest says “Lets go fuck him.”
The rabbi looks for a minute and then says “Out of what?”
A priest and a rabbi operated a church and a synagogue across the street from each other. Since their schedules intertwined, they decided to go in together to buy a car.
After the purchase, they drove it home and parked it on the street between them.
A few minutes later, the rabbi looked out and saw the priest sprinkling water on their new car. It didn’t need a wash, so he hurried out and asked the priest what he was doing. “I’m blessing it,” the priest replied.
The rabbi considered this a moment, then went back inside the synagogue. He reappeared a moment later with a hacksaw, walked over to the back of the car and cut off two inches of the tailpipe.