“This frosting isn’t water soluble!”
– davepoobond
Tag Archives: davepoobond
Titan Shops Commercial – Return of Titan Bob
Titan Shops Commercial – The Savings Professor Strikes Back!
Quote #22657
“This store at my school is like a fucking mall. There’s so much fun shit here! I could spend so much money…”
– customer on the phone walking by davepoobond
#22656: sunny_girl -> davepoobond
sunny_girl: hey how are you? i love Donnie Darko! every time i hear that song from the movie i can’t help but sing along and think of frank!!!
davepoobond: yeah the song instantly reminds me of that movie too. i’ve probably seen it about 10 or 15 times all together. did you read much into the conclusion of the story that much? which interpretation did you prescribe to?
sunny_girl: there are all kinds of things…telling the future, he’s posesed, its a dream, they go back in time, its a relfection of the past, he has schizophrenia…there are so many things. i get something new each time i watch it
davepoobond: well, i know that, i was just wondering which one you believed it was
sunny_girl: lol i think its a dream which do you think
davepoobond: i think it had more to do with the universe needing to explain to itself where the airplane jet engine came from, so it created the alternate path to show what would happen had donnie lived. i thought it was the more believable explanation rather than the religious one or just it being a dream, which I suppose is the less complex explanation.
sunny_girl: That is pretty complex.
#22655: DizzyLizzy -> davepoobond
DizzyLizzy: Hi,
I noticed you looked at the profile and saw I am in Oregon. Sorry about that, I lived in your city before here, and I think I was just messing around, and missing home a little bit, so I was looking at people near there. I didn’t really need to explain all that, but I guess I did anyway. It is sad what being away from home does to a person.
Elizabeth
Quote #22651
A guy in a normal, not very interesting-looking denim long sleeve shirt is walking by davepoobond. One of the employees of the store is walking behind him, sort of chasing him a little.
Employee: “Hey, that’s a nice shirt.”
Guy doesn’t hear him or ignores him.
Employee: “Hey that’s a nice shirt, man!”
Guy stops and turns around.
Guy: “Huh?”
Employee: “I said that’s a nice shirt.”
Guy: “Oh. Thanks…”
Guy walks off.
– at davepoobond’s job
Quote #22650
“The air is getting to my butt!”
– a girl customer at davepoobond’s job
Quote #22649
“Whoa… iPods have FaceTime! …. Some iPods can’t even play music loudly!”
– some loser customer at davepoobond’s job
Squacklecast Episode 15 – “Crappy Movies Under the Stars”
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Hey folks! We’re back after a mini-hiatus. We failed at coaxing our only previous guest from attending this podcast, so we catch up with the freelancing gig I’m doing tomorrow instead.
And it looks like its going to be a disaster! Just like the rest of this week’s episode… full of technical problems! Technically the problem is davepoobond. (Get it?)
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Billy watched The Dark Knight Returns, Part 2.
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Total Recall (the new one) sucked balls. I didn’t see it yet, but its just an example of dumbing down and mainstreaming the source content for no apparent reason.
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Len Wiseman is a terrible director. Fuck that guy. He’s going to ruin the Mummy reboot, just like he ruined Total Recall.
The new Mummy should be in space.
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Guess I know what’s going on my shelf in the near future!
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Wouldn’t you do Red Sonja back in the day?
What about Maria Shriver?
I think I know which Arnold Schwarzenegger movie counterpart I’d do. And that would be the predator — that mouth is so sexy.
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Deep Space Nine introduces a character named Vic Fontaine halfway through Season 6. There is… A LOT of singing. For no apparent reason. They just hang out there a lot for no particular reason.
They couldn’t think of anything better?
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iPhone 5 came out this past week. Did I get one? No. Will I get one? Maybe. The maps suck on it though.
Who woulda thought upgrading to iOS 6 Maps would be about as useful as that Fox News app?
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Who’s going to make the world’s first nutritional supplement replicator? Apple or Google?
I say Apple.
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First thing I’m going to do with that new Replicator thinger is replicate some alcohol to put in my piss and sell it.
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So, how much would you pay for the Crappy Movies Under the Stars Film Festival? HMMMMM???
Quote #22632
::davepoobond is watching Star Trek::
Roommate (as he is leaving): “May the force be with you!”
davepoobond: “ummmm…. wrong Star… thing…”
Roommate: “It’s alright.”
– at davepoobond’s house
The Sour Lemon Lady
A lady came and asked if there was a graduation tassel on hold for her and it was supposed to be at customer service for her. I said I didn’t have anything like that for her (asking her name and what kind it was supposed to be). She said that she talked to the manager directly about it and she had gotten a call from “some girl with a fancy name” last week and told them to hold it, even though she had gotten it months before. So I spent about 5 to 10 minutes trying to track down the manager (he wasn’t there), then asked if any of the gear representatives knew about any tassel on hold for this lady by the manager. No one knew.
I eventually asked the gear department supervisor if she knew where the manager would put something like that and she said she didn’t know, so she called him, left him a message, and we waited for him to call. In the mean time I went back and told the lady we don’t know anything about this item and I resumed to ask the lady for her number so we can call her back when we found out more info about it.
The manager calls during this time and says he didn’t know anything about it, so we ask the lady again who called her and asked her how she paid for it. She eventually says she did a phone order, which would still imply that a gear department rep would have helped her. The supervisor asked me if Web would have it, but I told her they would only have it if THEY did the web order, not if the lady had talked to the gear manager about it since they are COMPLETELY different departments with different procedures and managers. So the lady looked through her call log to see who called her, and it was the web department.
Once we found that out, I said I would call them, and then the lady accused me all of a sudden — “SEE YOU SHOULD HAVE CALLED THEM, SHE WAS TELLING YOU THAT WEB HAD DONE IT OVER AND OVER BUT YOU SAID NO NO NO NO”
All I could say was “Ummm…” I eventually called Web and they brought down her stupid tassel and she left.
LIKE ITS MY FUCKING FAULT SHE DIDN’T FUCKING KNOW WHO SHE TALKED TO AND SHE SAID THAT PETER KNEW ALL ABOUT IT BUT HE DIDN’T KNOW ANYTHING.
FUCK THAT LADY FUCK HER
Squacklecast Episode 14 – “An Eternity of Dog Food Commercials”
Podcast: Play in new window | Download
Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | RSS
Welcome to the “try-weekly” episode of the Squacklecast. This week we talk about this super sappy and emotional dog food commercial that will make anyone have a tear come to their eye because they’ve been puking their guts out at how much it makes you sick:
Another thing, is that they’re preparing Mac and Cheese for this asshole hours before he even gets home.
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Imagine getting out of your car one day, closing the door, and seeing a huge dog all of a sudden appear in front of you.
OH SHIT!
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Wouldn’t you like to live forever? It would give you enough time to finish off all of the Star Trek series before passing onto the next world, after all.
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If there’s one, two, or three movies you need to see before you die, it would be the 3 Ninjas series, with High Noon at Mega Mountain being the best.
It features a dangerous course full of fire built by a decrepit old man for his grandsons. I think that constitutes as child endangerment. Good thing he dies. Whoops, spoiler.
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Surf Ninjas was pretty awesome too. Here’s the others we were talking about:
Next Squacklecast, we’ll talk about more movies on our Netflix queues…
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What I learned from World of Warcraft is: “You don’t have something until you have it.” It’s a life lesson. Or something.
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Ras Al Ghul from Batman Begins became an eco-terrorist with his eternity of time to live.
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Total Recall (the real one) foretells a time of three-titted babes on Mars. I can’t wait to live there during my fifth lifetime.
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Curiosity is just using Instagram filters to take its pictures of Mars. Behold.
Before Instagram (aka before being cool):
After Instagram (aka now its cool):
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Facebook City? Also known as Las Vegas…
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Jonathan Frakes kind of overacts during his “Riker-focused” episodes in Star Trek. Here’s a select few where he’s always trying to bang a chick, a job once reserved for a Captain, now given to the Second-in-Command.:
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See you guys next month!!! GET ITTTT???!?!?!?