erospin – n. a car that has a massager in the seats
Tag Archives: car
blomquist
blomquist – n. a car that has strobe lights instead of headlights, playing the village people, and you see everything in frames when it comes near. Its painted like a disco tile floor all neon colors like orange, pink and yellow and the guy driving it looks like Elvis, and theres a disco ball in the car, which gives off the strobe lights off everywhere. It has the liscense plate “DISCOKNG” and on the front hood it says “DISCO IS NOT DEAD”
ramismo
ramismo – n. a car that has strobe lights instead of headlights
constinide
constinide – n. the strange phenomena when 3 people try to jack the same car at the same time, and they aren’t working together
kyuregyan
kyuregyan – v. to find a 1978 Cutlass Supreme buried in the dirt
sh’bo
sh’bo – n. a vine that eats cars
fueerz
fueerz – n. a 4 and a half wheel drive car
orihuela
orihuela – n. a 1 wheel drive car
cowin
cowin – n. a 3 wheel drive car
adru
adru – n. an electric car that says “rent me”
linakrbcsfr
linakrbcsfr – n. car keys with a notebook on the ring
ovoelvleve
ovoelvleve – v. to love cars for their fast and reckless nature
Intersections: Phenomena or Conspiracy?
Stupid intersections.
For example, you’re walking down the street, toward an intersection of 2 streets. As you walk toward it, not a car is there, but…as you get closer and you’re about to go across the street, the cars come from all ways, making your crossing all the more difficult, not to mention all the people driving the cars are usually idiots, almost running you over and such. Or if they don’t see you and cut in front of you, smiling and waving.
CROCK OF SHIT THAT’LL DO FOR YOU, THEY ALMOST RAN ME THE FUCK OVER, WHY SHOULD I BE SMILING AND WAVING BACK TO THEM? “THANKS FOR ALMOST RUNNING ME OVER, YOU GOT LUCKY THIS TIME!”
Then, as soon as you go across, they’re gone. No more cars. Its all bullshit really, its like all those people plan to go into the intersection at the same time as you.
Is it a conspiracy? Maybe.
Is it a phenomena? I don’t give a shit.
I’m just pissed off at intersections, and you should hate them too.
Joke #9306: Lantern of Events
In a terrible accident at a railroad crossing, a train smashed into a car and pushed it nearly four hundred yards down the track. Though no one was killed, the driver took the train company to court.
At the trial, the engineer insisted that he had given the driver ample warning by waving his lantern back and forth for nearly a minute. He even stood and convincingly demonstrated how he’d done it. The court believed his story, and the suit was dismissed.
“Congratulations,” the lawyer said to the engineer when it was over. “You did superbly under cross-examination.”
“Thanks,” he said, “but he sure had me worried.”
“How’s that?” the lawyer asked.
“I was afraid he was going to ask if the damned lantern was lit!”
Joke #9284: Rolling Back the Years
A blonde was trying to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems selling it, because the car had almost 230,000 miles on it.
One day, she told her problem to a brunette she worked with at a salon. The brunette told her, “There is a possibility to make the car easier to sell, but it’s not legal.”
“That doesn’t matter,” replied the blonde, “if I can only sell the car.”
“Okay,” said the brunette. “Here is the address of a friend of mine. He owns a car repair shop. Tell him I sent you and he will ‘fix it’. Then you shouldn’t have a problem anymore trying to sell your car.”
The following weekend, the blonde made the trip to the mechanic. About one month after that, the brunette asked the blonde, “Did you sell your car?”
“No,” replied the blonde, “Why should I? It only has 50,000 miles on it!”