If p, then q
p implies q
p only if q
q if p
If p, then q
If not p, then not q
if not q, then not p
q if p
Oh, Curse Your Dreadful Poo
u gonna stay online while poo-ing?
i was thinking about wayyy back when on Prodigy
i used to have all these friends.
tons of’em!
years ago. all gone.
probably dead.
probably.
curse your poo-ing.
Poopy Poem
poopy poopy
everyone has to poopy
poopy here
poopy there
even poopy in your hair
everyone poopys,
dogs poopy
cats poopy
giraffes poopy
even rinos poopy
poopy everywhere, poopy everywhere.
where does it all come from?
everything eats, and everything poops
that’s just the way things are
when it comes to poopy
Roll Jordan Roll
My brother sitting on the tree of life,
and he heard when Jordan roll,
Roll, Jordan, roll, Jordan!
Roll, Jordan, roll!
What a Navaho Indian Talks About When He’s Stoned
The voice that beautifies the land
The voice above
The voice of the grasshopper,
Among the plants,
Again and again it sound, –
The voice that beautifies the land
dear fucker…
you are my fuckin friend.
and i hope you know thats fuckin true.
no matter what the fuck happens.
i will stand the fuck by you.
i will fuckin be here for you.
whenever the fuck you need me.
to lend a fuckin hand.
to do a fuckin good deed.
so just fuckin call on me.
whenever the fuck you need anything.
fuck i will always be there.
even to the bitter fuckin end.
forward this promise to all your fuckin friends
to show your fuckin friendship
and watch who sends it the fuck back to you.
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Joke #9311: Fresh Popped Colonel
A lieutenant was brilliant in military matters, but lacked a few social graces. One day he called a soldier in to the office and said “Kramer, your grandmother died.”
The soldier fell apart. After he left, the colonel told the lieutenant, “You could have been a little more tactful. I have some books at home that could help you.”
The lieutenant read the half-dozen books lent him by the colonel and was ready for the next crisis. Private Taylor’s grandfather had passed away.
The next morning, at reveille, the lieutenant said, “Men, how many of you have a grandfather still living? Not so fast, Private Taylor!”
Joke #9310: Sam’s Explosive Secret
A game warden noticed how a particular fellow named Sam consistently caught more fish than anyone else, whereas the other guys would only catch three or four a day. Sam would come in off the lake with a boat full. Stringer after stringer was always packed with freshly caught trout. The warden, curious, asked Sam his secret. The successful fisherman invited the game warden to accompany him and observe.
So the next morning the two met at the dock and took off in Sam’s boat. When they got to the middle of the lake, Sam stopped the boat, and the warden sat back to see how it was done.
Sam’s approach was simple. He took out a stick of dynamite, lit it, and threw it in the air. The explosion rocked the lake with such a force that dead fish immediately began to surface. Sam took out a net and started scooping them up.
Well, you can imagine the reaction of the game warden. When he recovered from the shock of it all, he began yelling at Sam. “You can’t do this! I’ll put you in jail, buddy! You will be paying every fine there is in the book!”
Sam, meanwhile, set his net down and took out another stick of dynamite. He lit it and tossed it in the lap of the game warden with these words, “Are you going to sit there all day complaining, or are you going to fish?”
Joke #9309: The Judge Shows No Class
In the traffic court of a large Midwestern city, a young lady was brought before the judge to answer for a ticket given her for driving through a red light. She explained to his honor that she was a schoolteacher and requested an immediate disposal of her case so she could get to the school on time.
A wild gleam came into the judge’s eyes. “You’re a schoolteacher, eh?” he said. “Madam, I shall realize my lifelong ambition. I’ve waited years to have a schoolteacher in this court. Now sit down at that table and write ‘I will not drive through red lights’ 500 times!”