“Somebody, Push me on a #dick, please !”
– Blankenship Lily, spammer on Twitter
Tag Archives: spam
Quote #25121
“I wan to #fondle me?”
– Blankenship Lily, spammer on Twitter
Quote #25120
“I want to feel the cock inside your self !”
– Blankenship Lily, spammer on Twitter
Ridiculous Spam Mail #24501
Nice to meet you, my name is Ella. My boyfriend dumped me today in the morning.
I got so sad, that I first wanted to get drunk, but later I realized that finding a fuck buddy will be a better medicine for me.
Can you heal my broken heart with your magic cock? Get it out of your first aid kit and inject it through my vagina.
Quote #24393
“I really like your profile. I think that we have many common interests. I am good at Ping-pong, cooking fish and yoga.”
– a spam e-mail
Quote #23704
“Hello there :). Im Carmen 😀
Well here’s the dealio LOL. Umm Im kinda in a messed up situation right now and I really need some help and well lets just say I can return the favor… Sort off. LOL.
Anyways, here’s whats happening right now in my life. I moved here for college and I’m going into business and I didn’t really have a place to stay. I had a couple hundred dollars so I ended up leasing an apartment and I never knew that If I didn’t pay the monthly rent I’d be screwed financially. I’ve actually been looking around for a job and right now I can’t really find one anywhere and my friend gave me the idea to sell my nudes that I took for my BF for his birthday and he’s not getting them for obvious reasons ;)!.
I have about 600+ pics and a video I made for him but he’s not getting them anymore LOL. He left me for this fat chick and I guess thats too bad for him. Anyways so I set up this online shop place where you can get my stuff, Its actually right here: <spam URL here>”
– a spammer’s profile on a dating site pretending to be a hot girl
#23306: davepoobond -> Return of the Dragon
davepoobond: whoa i got an email from jesus
davepoobond: it was spam though
Return of the Dragon: hahahaha
Quote #22628
“You could definitely see your enthusiasm within the paintings you write.”
– a spam comment
Ridiculous Spam Mail #22447
Subject: Is that you?
Hello.
I know that every woman want to have a gentle, caring,honest and self confident man. I realy want to love. I am loyal, energetic and friendly person. Family and friends are big part of my life.
My hobby is collecting toys. When I enter the room where lot of toys are on the arm-chair and sofa my mood and condition becomes much better.
Do you wish to know more about me? Just write me: <insert spam link> Yours Evgenija.
The Nicest Spam Mail Ever
From: Chris
Subject: Hello
Hi. How are things? We may be getting down there to your neck of the bay soon so maybe we can all go get a bite to eat or something. I’ll keep you messaged. See you later. Chris
Ridiculous Spam Mail #22174
Subject: Why?
Hi.
Are you looking for a bride? Maybe I’m the that interest you!
My name is Karina and last name is Kuzmina. I live in Kaluga. I am a nice “kitten” with an interesting personality. You can see for yourself in my photos. I am 23 years. I have a good education and a profession favorite. I adore to go skating. I like communicating with my friends, discussing all aspects of living.
I have light hair and brown eyes and would love to write letters with good man. Oh, I can speak for hours about my ideal match and how I see relations with my true love. If you dream you meet me then contact me communicating with me is easy and fun and you will never be bored with me.
Facebook Message #21483: davepoobond -> Abegail
davepoobond gets a friend request from some random person named Abegail. davepoobond sends a message to this person to figure out if he knows her (which he knows he doesn’t.)
–
davepoobond: do i know you?
Abegail: im sorry about ur ask im not do
–
And, not surprisingly, their profile was deleted since it was probably a spammer.
Congratualation (You’ve Won!) Email Conversation
Ok, there was this stupid piece of junk mail that was sent to 28 people. Out of those 28 people, I was included, but there were 2 other people that were stupid enough to open it and RESPOND to it. This is what they said:
–
1st guy: eh… who r u ppl?
–
2nd guy: REALLY BUDDY, I DOUBT ANY OF US ARE THAT STUPID…BECAUSE I WENT TO THE SITE AND IT SAID FILL OUT SN AND PASSWORD…BUT THERE IS SOMETHING I REMEMBERD…
REMINDER…AOL WILL NEVER ASK YOU FOR YOUR PASSWORD OR ANY OTHER BILLING INFORMATION!
YOU ARE BEING REPORTED
–
I mean, these guys are stupid dumbasses. They act like they think we really care what they have to say, and reply all. Moral of the story is: Don’t reply all on spam mail.
Quote #21055
“You’ll Be Glad to Made it!”
– from a spam e-mail
Quote #21054
“P.S. If you prefer, you can also call the special toll-free number set up just for you: 1-888-FREESHIT!”
– from a spam e-mail
Note: Don’t try calling this number unless you are at a pay phone.