Joke #18694

Hospital regulations require a wheelchair for patients being discharged.

However, while working as a medical student, I found one elderly gentleman — already dressed and sitting on the bed with a suitcase at his feet — who insisted he didn’t need my help to leave the hospital.

After a chat about rules being rules, he reluctantly let me wheel him to the elevator. On the way down I asked him if his wife was meeting him.

“I don’t know,” he said. “She’s still upstairs in the bathroom changing out of her hospital gown.”


Joke #13222

A man frantically rushed into a hospital emergency room with two broken arms.  He ran up to the nurse at the desk and shouted, “I need a doctor!”

The nurse calmly nodded and said, “Before we treat you, I have to know one vital fact.”

“I’m not allergic to penicillin,” cried the man.  “My heart is fine and I’m not on any medication.”

“That’s good,” said the nurse, “but that’s not the information I need.”

“What is it then?” shouted the man, grimacing in pain.

The nurse replied, “Do you have medical coverage or will you pay cash?”