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GHIJKL

September 21st, 2013 Posted in (C) Mathematical Poems, Poetry and Songs No Comments »

always sometimes never
always sometimes
sometimes sometimes
always sometimes
sometimes

Given
because
yes

-~-

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In Class -1

September 21st, 2013 Posted in (C) Mathematical Poems, Poetry and Songs No Comments »

no yes yes
no yes no

no yes yes
yes no no

no no no
yes

yes yes yes
yes

proof

-~-

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Fuk yo bitch Ass mom

August 29th, 2013 Posted in (C) Funny Songs, Poetry and Songs No Comments »

Written for the movie Grandpa’s Town Pleasing Sweets.

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1st off fuk ur bitch n yo fat ass mom

i fn’ed fuken her but caz of her lose pussy i couldn’t cum

yea i no dats wrong

but tryin to battle against me

you won’t last long

like the weed in ma glass bong

they call me long shlong

-~-

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The tea is too cold…

August 3rd, 2013 Posted in (C) Funny Poem, Poetry and Songs No Comments »

I found this at school.

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The tea is too cold

The tea is too hot.  I can’t drink it.

I can’t put my dictionary in my pocket.  My dictionary is too big.

An elephant is too big.  A mouse is too small.

I can’t buy a boat because it’s too expensive, but Anita can buy one if she wants to.

We went to the Rocky Mountains for our vacation.  The mountains are too beautiful.

I can’t eat this food because it’s too salty.

Amanda doesn’t like her room in the dorm.  She thinks it’s too small.

I lost your dictionary.  I’m too sorry.  I’ll buy you a new one.

A: Do you like your math course?

B: Yes.  It’s too difficult, but I enjoy it.

-~-

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The Number Poem

August 3rd, 2013 Posted in (C) Funny Poem, Poetry and Songs No Comments »

1776
1492
1865
1964
1975
2001
1984
1898
1945
1918
1229
1812

-~-

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The Grand Spa

July 30th, 2013 Posted in (C) Serious Poems, Poetry and Songs No Comments »

Physical.

Mental.

Spiritual.

 

The Grand Spa
awaits you at the end of the Studio Walk
just before
the Grand Pool

Dust of yesterdays,
Leave me now and let me breathe.
I am water — yes.

Come vist,
The Grand Spa
Haven’t you waited for
this long enough?

-~-

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Elements of Display

July 21st, 2013 Posted in (C) Serious Poems, Poetry and Songs No Comments »

Props, chairs, furniture

Lighting lights

Color different shades

Texture rough, smooth

-~-

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With dry eyes

July 4th, 2013 Posted in (C) Funny Poem, Poetry and Songs No Comments »

With dry eyes
I cries
I drink your tears
So that I may eat your fears

-~-

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A Complimentary Poem

July 2nd, 2013 Posted in (C) Funny Poem, Poetry and Songs No Comments »

Your eyes are like the rolling winds

You sweep me off my feet

And throw me into the ocean

Where I drown in your loveliness

Until you kill me with your X-Ray Eyes…

-~-

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Extended “Birthday Song” Lyrics

May 20th, 2013 Posted in (C) Funny Songs, Poetry and Songs 1 Comment »

Everyone knows the birthday song, and quite frankly it sucks.  The only reason you want to sing it is to get to the fun part at the end where you just go on forever making up stupid shit.

I don’t know why you start singing about what’s on television, though.

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And many more, on Channel 4

And Scooby Doo, on Channel 2

And Frankenstein, on Channel 9

And a naked lady, on Channel 80

-~-

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First the Worst

May 20th, 2013 Posted in (C) Funny Songs, Poetry and Songs No Comments »

This is the version of the playground rhyme that I remember from my elementary school.  There are obviously a lot of variations.

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First the worst

Second the best

Third the nerd

Fourth the one with the hairy chest

Fifth the bitch

Sixth the snitch

Seventh goes to heaven

Eighth goes naked

-~-

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Anti-Barney the Dinosaur Song #23007

May 1st, 2013 Posted in (F) Anti-Barney the Dinosaur Songs, Poetry and Songs No Comments »

I love you

You love me

Can you spell bestiality?

With a  b-e-a-s-t-i-a-l-t and y

That will get you three to five.

-~-

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Anti-Barney the Dinosaur Song #23005

May 1st, 2013 Posted in (F) Anti-Barney the Dinosaur Songs, Poetry and Songs 1 Comment »

I hate you

You hate me

Barney is the cause of World War Three

With some shotguns on our backs

And something with infrared

Let’s go blow off Barney’s head!

-~-

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Anti-Barney the Dinosaur Song #23004

May 1st, 2013 Posted in (F) Anti-Barney the Dinosaur Songs, Poetry and Songs No Comments »

It happened one day in the studio

Dancing around in a do-si-do

Knocked over a candle and he starts to burn

Uh-oh Barneys on fire

It’s what we’ve always desired

We’ll watch the flames get higher

Just don’t try to put him out!

-~-

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Anti-Barney the Dinosaur Song #22921

March 30th, 2013 Posted in (F) Anti-Barney the Dinosaur Songs, Poetry and Songs No Comments »

I hate you

You hate me

Let’s hang Barney in a tree

With a stick up his butt,

And a bullet in his wiener.

-~-

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