Category Archives: Poetry and Songs

Poetry and songs. Funny and serious.

Poetry and Songs, (C) Song Parodies

The Real Saddam Hussein

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Parody of “The Real Slim Shady” by Eminem

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May I have your attention please……

May I have your attention please…..

Will the real Saddam Hussein please stand up

I repeat, will the real Saddam Hussein please stand up

Where not gonna have a resolution here

 

You act like youve never seen a terrorist before

Start kicking his ass

First for the guns

Second spanking his ass over the furniture

 

Its the return of a regiem

No way

You kidding?

Did he say what I think he did

Did he?

And Bin Laden said?

Nothing you idiot,

Bin Laden’s dead

Bush blew his head off in the basement

 

Dont terrorist just love Saddam

Sa, sa, sa, sa, sa, Sadam Im sick of him

Look at himblowing up countries, wanking over Arafat and you know who

But his mostache is so cute though

 

Yeah I probably got a few bombs in my pants

But no worse than what goes on in Blairs bedroom

Sometimes when I go on tv I want to shoot one of my doubles

But I cant caus Id get found out

 

Bin Ladens on my lips, Bin Ladens on my lips

And maybe, I might blow him a lil kiss

 

And the message we deliver to Iraq

To go into restaurants and blow themselves up

 

Caus I Saddam Hussein yes Im the real Saddam Hussein

Yo you other 8 doubles are just imitating

So wont the real Saddam Hussein please stand up

Please stand up

Please stand up

 

Cause I’m Saddam Hussein yes I’m the real Saddam Hussein

Yo you other 8 doubles are just imitating

So wont the real Saddam Hussein please stand up

Please stand up

Please stand up.

Poetry and Songs, (C) Song Parodies

STORY BOUT A GRILL

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Parody of “Absolutely,” by Nine Days

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THIS IS A STORY BOUT A GRILL

 

HAD A GAS LEAK AND BURNT THE WHOLE WORLD

 

BUT WHILE LOOKED SO SAD THROUGH ALL THE SMOKE I ABSOLUTLY LOVE HIM

 

WHEN HE COOKS

 

HOW MANY DAYS OF THE YEAR DO YOU WAKE UP WITH HOPE BUT ONLY FINE THAT THE SMOKE HASN’T CLEARED

 

BUT EACH TIME HE SITS THERE WEARIN HOLES IN THE SOULS OF HIS WHEELS

 

NOW YOOUR CHARCOLE NEVER LAYS IN QUIT THE SAME WAY

 

ANDYOU NEVER SEEM TO RUN OUT OF RECIPES

Poetry and Songs, (C) Funny Songs

Poop on My Finger

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I got pooop on my finger

I got poop poop on my finger

I got poop poop poop on my finger

I got poop poop poop poop on my finger

I got poop poop poop poop poop on my finger

 

I got pooop on my finger

I got poop poop on my finger

I got poop poop poop on my finger

I got poop poop poop poop on my finger

I got poop poop poop poop poop on my finger

 

What the hell! I got poop on my finger!

Poetry and Songs, (C) Funny Songs, (C) Song Parodies

Doggie Wonderland: Marking Up My Winter Wonder Land

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Parody of “Winter Wonderland”

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Dog tags ring, are you listening?

In the lane, snow is glistening.

It’s yellow, not white, I’ve been there tonight,

marking up my winter wonder land.

Smell that tree? That’s my fragrance.

It’s a sign for wondering vagrants.

Aviod where I pee, it’s my prop-er-ty!

Marking up my winter wonderland.

In the meadow Mom will build a snowman,

following the classical design.

Then I’ll left my leg and let it go, man,

so all the world will know that it’s mine-mine-mine!

Straight from me to the fence post,

flows my natural incense boast,

stay off my turf, this small piece of earth,

I marked it as my winter wonderland!

Poetry and Songs, (C) Funny Songs

Lyrics for a Beautiful Song (make up your own tune)

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I think I shall never see, a poem lovely as a shit.

A tree whose hungry tit is pressed against the Earth’s sweet hairy breast,

A tree that looks at Steve Fish all day and lifts her cute girls to pray.

A tree that may in summer wear, a nest of fingers in her glasses.

Upon whose scare snow has lain.

Who intimately lives with balls.

Teeth are made by fools like me, but only toes can make a toe.

Poetry and Songs, (F) Theme Songs, (C) Funny Songs

The Poo Plux Plan SING ‘A LONG

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Sung to the Beverly Hillbillies theme song.

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BROUGHT TO YOU BY: SLEEP TRAIN MATRESS CENTER. (not really)

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Come on ‘n listen to my story ’bout a man named Wilson

A little scary baby, hardley had any friends

And then one day, he was chewin’ on some poo

And up through his butt popped a can of Mountain Dewwwwww.

Poo, that is, brown gold, smelly mud

 

Well, the first thing you know, old Wilson’s eyes glowed

Lil’ Sherwood said,”Wilson, Like I give a care!”

Said, Poo Plux Plan is the place you oughta be

So they cleaned out their butts and they moved to the Pluuuuux

Poo Plux, that is, gigglesticks’, ::Veronica:: ‘s

 

Well, now it’s time to say goodbye to Wilson and all his friends

They would like to spank you folks for humpin’ their hens

You’re all invited back again to their cool new Clan

Do I have ta remeind you, it’s tha Poo Plux Plaaaaan!?

Wilson’s Plan, that is, it isn’t ‘Ku-Ku’, it deals with a boo-boo.

 

Y’all Check it out, hear?

(C) Funny Songs, Poetry and Songs

Ode to a Smurf

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Davey, Davey, Dave

Dave Davey Dayve Day Da Day

Davey Day da Day

Day Day Day Da Davey

Dave Da Davey Dave, ::back round singers:: Davey Dave Davey

Davey Da Dave Da Dave Day ::back ups:: Da Dave Dave Day

Davey Dayve Day Da::back ups:: Da Day Day Day

Da Day Day Day

Davey Davey Dave Dave Davey Dave Day Da Day Dave Da Dave Da Daay ayy ayyyyy…. Smurf.