The whole Joke archive. Tons of jokes!
Upon returning from a field trip to the zoo, the principal asked Miss Dickinson how she enjoyed the outing.
“Oh, it was horrible,” said Miss Dickinson. “The snakes stuck their tongues out and the monkeys kept making faces.”
“Well, you know what they say,” replied the principal. “Boas will be boas, and gorillas will be gorillas.”
Q: What do you call assignments from a Chinese cooking class?
A: Home-wok.
No matter what happened in the classroom, Mrs. McGilicuddy was the kind of teacher who never got upset.
One day a 747 crash-landed in the classroom and she said, “Who threw that?”
TEACHER: “How can you do so many stupid things in one day?”
ANDREW: “I get up early.”
Q: Why did the autumn leaves have to stay after school?
A: Because they missed the gust.
Q: Why did the snake have to stay after school?
A: Because he hissed the bus.
Q: Why did the elephant have to stay after school?
A: Because he missed the bus.
STAN: “My nickname is Scissors.”
DAN: “Because you’re so sharp?”
STAN: “No, because I always cut class.”
TEACHER: “Why did you copy Larry’s test?”
SEYMOUR: “What gave me away?”
TEACHER: “His name on your paper.”
Q: How do athletes get to school?
A: They walk.
Q: How do bees get to school?
A: On a school buzz.
Q: How do bullies get to school?
A: On a cruel bus.
Q: How do lifeguards get to school?
A: On a pool bus.
Q: How do clowns get to school?
A: On a fool bus.
Q: How do Santa’s elves get to school?
A: On a Yule bus.