A fighter’s manager said to his beat-up boxer between rounds, “he’s killing you, Rocky!”
Rocky answered, “I know. I should have belted him before the fight when there was only one of him!”
All posts by davepoobond
Joke #12611
Two gals were in a restaurant when one said, “How was your date with that hockey player last night?”
The other gasped, “It was for the birds. I won’t say he was ugly, but his hockey mask looked better than he did.”
Joke #12610
The reporter was interviewing the seven-foot-tall basketball player for his newspaper. He asked, “What is the hardest thing you have to do each day?”
The basketball star replied, “I guess it’s tying my shoes.”
Joke #12609
MAN: “How many slopes did they have at the ski resort you went to?”
WOMAN: “Three… Beginners, Intermediate and Call-An-Ambulance!”
Joke #12608
We read in the newspaper about a baseball player who’s so rich, he hired a guy to warm up for him before a game.
Joke #12607
GOLFER: “Tell me, caddy, are you good at finding lost golf balls?”
CADDY: “You bet I am.”
GOLFER: “Great! Now go find me one so we can start this game.”
Joke #12606
A guy took his girl to a college football practice and pointed towards the players. “See that big guy over there, Number 15?” he said. “I think he’s going to be our best man next year.”
The coed said, “Golly! This is so sudden!”
Joke #12605
HARRY: “These are my golf socks?”
GARRY: “What do you mean golf socks?”
HARRY: “They have 18 holes.”
Joke #12604
MIKE: “Every morning I jog 5 miles. What do you do to keep in shape?”
SPIKE: “Every morning I turn off the alarm clock, bat my eyelashes 20 times, and then I slowly walk around the bed and jump back in.”
Joke #12603
Why is that the kids who claimed to hate school the most always end up as teachers?
Joke #12602
MAN: “I’ll have you know that I’m a captain of industry.”
STUDENT: “So, big deal! I outrank you. I’m a business major.”
Joke #12601
I didn’t graduate form high school because I got a zero in one subject — attendance.
Joke #12600
“Did the music teacher actually say your voice was heavenly?”
“Well, she did say it was unearthly.”
Joke #12599
TEACHER: “Morgan, when will you be ready to give me the answer to today’s addition problem?”
STUDENT: “Sum time, teacher, sum time.”
Joke #12598
MAN: “My son is sure learning a lot at business school.”
FRIEND: “Like what?”
MAN: “Well, he never writes home asking for money anymore. He just bills us for a loan.”