Subway: Eat Shit!

Jared is sitting in a subway eating some shitty Subway sandwich. Some hot HOT girls walk up to him in slutty outfits.

Slut #1: “hey Jared, is that sub the size of your dick or did you loose all of your dick on that diet?”

Jared: “ha Ha you girls are so funny. I’m just eating this delicious subway sandwich. It only has 6 grams of fat, 0 calories and 0 taste! It’s like i’m so cool again!”

Slut #2: “Dayumn boy, you suck more dick then I do, don’t you?”

Jared: “girls, girls, please. I’m trying to enjoy my dinner and not about my sexual preferences.”

Suddenly the manager of subway walks over to Jared.

Manager: “I’m sorry sir, but your credit card was rejected. Apparently you went bankrupt from buying all our sandwiches. Were going to have to ask you to leave.”

Jared: “But…but…I’m your best customer…how can you do this to me!” He busts out in tears. “God please don’t let me die! I want my mommy! I LOVE YOU SUBWAY!”

Subway security is called over by the manager and the security guys tackle Jared. Jared wiggles while crying “SUBWAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYY” at the top of his lungs and he gets thrown out onto the streets. The security people throw a sandwich full of shit at him and it hits him in the face. He just continues crying. The sluts come outside.

Slut #1: “Well hot shit, you might as well come home with us”


Slut #2: We’ll show you a REAL subway!”

They take Jared to there crack shack and show him there “subway” all night long. A few months go by and Jared ends up a crack head and alcoholic who weighs 524 pounds and has 2 wives who are the biggest sluts. One day when he’s actually sober and not beatin his bitches, he talks to his wives.

Jared: “I wanna go and see subway. get me mah ramp”

The girls put a ramp up to the couch he’s laying on. He just rolls off the couch onto a stretcher on the floor. The bitches then pick his heavy ass up and walk on over to subway. They roll him inside. Security tries to stop him but he just rolls them over. He then gargles all the food in the store, including the employees.

Jared: “Mhhmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmHhhhhhmmmmmmHhmmmm” Munch Munch Munch.

Jared became the subway robber until all subways went bankrupt. he then was arrested and rolled into the ocean where he can float to another far way country…like Canada. The 2 bitches fucked some more guys, then fucked women and each other. They retired at age 101 when they finally died. Subway went out of business because everyone was afraid of “the roller” (Jared’s criminal nickname” robbing them. The manager of subway who asked jared to leave was eaten and put in Jared’s stomach and slowly but painfully died of the digestion acid in Jared’s stomach. She was released from this hellhole through a hole in the form, of a brown substance. The person who wrote this story clicked the send button so it could be put on Squackle. The fuckin end.

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