I found this.

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My first time on an Apple computer! Today was sort of a lame day at work. Things are pretty much slow right now, almost no calls in the queue, so I decided to think differently and start learning Apple. I installed AOL on this old PowerPC crap box at work when XLGPx02134 decides to chime in. I lost the first few lines unfortunately, because I SUCK at Apple. Somehow I killed the IM, have NO idea what I clicked. The whole operating system makes NO sense whatsoever. Why only one button on the mouse? WTF is “Appletalk?” I’ve been managing networks now for about 5 years, and think the “Chooser” and Appletalk Zones are the most inefficient method of network organization. WOW! OSX has SMB!!! HOLY COW!!

Shit, sorry, I digress. He’s the shithead’s IM.

John170: I’m working right now, but I do enjoy being your focus

XLGPx02134: Say when.

John170: When!

John170: Now what?

XLGPx02134: You wanna kick my a$$, then do it.

John170: I said KISS. I’m into that today.

John170: Is it clean shaven?

XLGPx02134: You are immature .

XLGPx02134: P.S. She called you that first.

XLGPx02134: hOLD

John170: I feel so offended 🙂

XLGPx02134: Offer to go visit her at work.

XLGPx02134: You talk pretending to be me again and i WILL find you.

John170: I put your quote in my profile, I liked it

XLGPx02134: That’s expected.

XLGPx02134: You are either a girl or 18

John170: Oh you did NOT expect that

John170: Come on you sillyhead

XLGPx02134: Fess it up. WHICH chick are you?

John170: I’m yours!

XLGPx02134: Another one who says they are at work but sit here round the tick tock.

XLGPx02134: Live off your girlfriend?

XLGPx02134: Wait. She’s not employed either.

XLGPx02134: Med Leave this month.

John170: No, honest, I’m at work.

John170: I got a phone, a pen, a stapler, and a few puters here.

XLGPx02134: Offer to bring her lunch at work. They never heard of her.

XLGPx02134: Copy boy?

XLGPx02134: You are a PUP, bro.

XLGPx02134: PUP

John170: as in a little doggy?

XLGPx02134: You not embarrassed to talk with all that #$%^ website?

XLGPx02134: Desperado poster child

John170: Not at all, I’m happy with my dysfunctional personality.

XLGPx02134: Shell says this will go on your page. Im flattered dude. Im going to real work now.

XLGPx02134: anything needs to be said, say it to ME tough boy.

John170: I’m still wondering who Shell is. She must be someone very special.

XLGPx02134: I’ll find out which one you are.

XLGPx02134: Thought Linda, but I admit an error

XLGPx02134: Man here.

John170: It takes a man to admit his errors. Bravo!

XLGPx02134: I think your Mommy put Oreos in your lunchbox.

John170: Can we talk again? I like you.

XLGPx02134: Count on it.

XLGPx02134: You are infamous bro.

XLGPx02134: I bet you have a nice figure too like all the fat chicks.

John170: My coworkers are laughing at this. Can I print it out to show others?

XLGPx02134: Good luck finding a nice ‘woman’ here.

XLGPx02134: Coworkers? Nintendo buddies?

XLGPx02134: Seniors out of school already?

John170: They still make Nintendo?? I had one in college. Wow

John170: I had an Atari too

XLGPx02134: Your buddies need to come in and feel manly by harrassing women, too?

John170: The ones online or the ones in jail. Please specify.

XLGPx02134: I use the term ‘manly’ in i’s lightest form..

XLGPx02134: Jail wouldn’t surprise me.

John170: I’m sure you’re well adept at determining masculinity 🙂

XLGPx02134: Let’s meet and see what you say to face.

XLGPx02134: I don’t throw punches unless I need to.

John170: You’re gonna AOLbeatme?

XLGPx02134: Don’t be afraid, my MAN.

XLGPx02134: The more you say, the more you sound like a chick.

XLGPx02134: I bet you sit on a pillow at work.

John170: It’s a comfy chair. Gotta keep my bum bum soft.

XLGPx02134: Keep playing me. Im feeding off of this.

John170: Same here!

John170: As stated earlier, I like you

XLGPx02134: You are ‘immature, but fun’. She was honest there.

XLGPx02134: I know you are a chick.

John170: But thank GOD she has you now.

XLGPx02134: I will say 98% sure.

XLGPx02134: She had me, bro.

John170: How come you call me a chick, and then call me bro shortly after? Just curious.

XLGPx02134: A few of us.

XLGPx02134: Which do you prefer?

John170: Non gender specific. Call me “it”

XLGPx02134: If you are a MAN, I got some advice for you.

John170: I’m ready!

XLGPx02134: I’m man enough to help out the peons here.

XLGPx02134: When you fall for that AOL chick, or possibly ‘man’ in your capacity, hold tight.

XLGPx02134: You’ll need all the help you can get.

John170: And that’s your job, to help!

XLGPx02134: I have a heart for less fortunate

John170: Do you give to charity?

XLGPx02134: Is that your real name?

XLGPx02134: Maybe its Donna.

John170: Could be Sam too.

John170: Or … Pat

XLGPx02134: Go clean your locker.

John170: Can I leave my Erik Estrada pictures in it?

XLGPx02134: Now your making sense.

XLGPx02134: I will let you get back to your nails and hair now.

XLGPx02134: John.

John170: Sorry, busy for a sec. Anything else?

XLGPx02134: Oh yeh. Working.

XLGPx02134: Checks come in this time of the month. Opening an envelope isnt work.

XLGPx02134: Ciao, MANfriend.

John170: Can we talk later??? Please?

John170: I got to get lunch in a bit.

XLGPx02134: Bitter b$tch.

John170: Better or bitter? Pardon?

XLGPx02134: Your maturity shows me that you need the last word.

John170: What time do you have to work today? Can I schedule our next chat?

XLGPx02134: I go in at 3.

John170: Janitor?

John170: A fine profession

XLGPx02134: Keep dreaming and maybe you will be one someday.

John170: I practice cleaning my own urine and feces off the toilet every day.

XLGPx02134: My phone is ringing. You might want to stick around.

John170: Ok, I may be one when you get off of work. Hopefully we can chat then. If not, I’ll sign on again during the day. That ok?

XLGPx02134: Like I said. Time and place.

XLGPx02134: SAy it all to my face

XLGPx02134: We go from there.

John170: Ok. I’ll start practicing my man-kissing then. I cannot wait! You dress like the indian, I’ll be construction guy. Take care 🙂

XLGPx02134: Grow up kid. Or stand by the chicks.

John170: last word byeeeee 🙂 Lunch time